Recipes NOT to be repeated!!

Nix143

Gawd, my disasters are too numerous to mention

I've stopped trying Jamie Oliver after two minging results from him - anyone tried the mozarella salad covered in creme frech (sp?)? Truly horribly hideous. It looked so lovely in the book. And Jamies Pukka Curry Sauce, the best curry sauce ever *pfffffffffffffffting* was rubbish, didnt really taste of anything.

Delia's gingernuts - I got these really wrong LOL - they spread all over the baking tray and became ginger thins

I've now learnt that no matter how expensive the ingredients or time consuming the process if you're hell bent on impressing someone with a new recipe try it first. There is nothing so depressing as the moment when you realise it has all gone horribly wrong and there is nothing you can do about it.

PurpleDuck

Curv wrote: »

Jamie Oliver's sesame seed caramel brittle - I couldn't even get the sugar to turn in the least bit golden. With hindsight, I think his proportions of water to sugar must've been out but I've never been bothered to go back and try again.

:rolleyes:

Same thing happened to me. It was vile :rolleyes:

freyasmum

cbsexec wrote: »

My main complaint is why do mine never look like the pictures in the books - their cakes are always 10ft high, beautiful colours etc Everythin just the right constituency - I think they write recipe books with just one thing not quite right so ordinary people think they can't cook as well as famous cooks!

Hiya, I'm not sure about recipe books, but I do now that when they do food shoots for food packaging, they don't always use what they are supposed to be promoting - think mashed potato ice cream :eek:

Lx

jennet1

Jamie Olivers poached chicken with veggies, should have realised simmering baby turnips and other small vegetables for 1.5 hours or so = waterey mush

Skint_Catt

My worst so far has been slimming world syn free mayonnaise. I was picturing Hellmans, and got....milk. YUCK! Was fromage frais, sweetener, white wine vinegar, mustard power. EUGH!

dronid

Re Nigella

Raspberry_Swirl wrote: »

i'm pretty certain that the type of red bus she was on is not even in service anymore so it had to be staged!!!

Just as an aside there still are a few Routemasters around in London and it did look like a proper TFL Bus Stop.

On the other hand it appeared to stop very close to the house... would she live next to a bus stop.:rolleyes:

I tend to like her opening approach of it's really easy.:D

She then tends to prove herself wrong.:rolleyes:

Which is a shame as cooking is really easy! I've trained up a number of people who insisted they couldn't cook and that they had nothing in.

A friend of mine said the only ingredient she realised she missed was imagination.

My failure has always been stir frys and salads. Which is a shame as I enjoy both. I just overdo the stir fry and make the salad look a mess. It's really annoying. My mother used to have a blind spot with ommeletes! Fine with everything else but them.

Oh yes - theres also breadmaker cakes - they never work for me!:rotfl:

filigree_2

There's a so-called "authentic Indian restaurant curry" recipe available all over the Net which I tried and it was disgusting. I bought the Kris Dillon book thinking it would solve the problem but the recipes were exactly the same - I'm not sure who copied who! Trouble is, all the recipes urge you to follow the instructions exactly and not panic if it looks funny, and promise it will be lovely in the end. It wasn't, it was Day Glo green gritty slime :mad: Flogged the book on Amazon to some other poor mug.

I haven't tried Slimming World mayonnaise, but I have tried the Weight Watchers No Count cake. Allegedly you can eat as much of this cake as you like - yippee! The main ingredients are polenta, eggs and bananas. The mixture looked revolting but I trusted that after cooking it would transform into the fluffy golden cake in the recipe book. It didn't, it was nasty hot grey slime that was so runny I couldn't put it in the bin, I had to flush it down the toilet :eek:

Best recipe disaster ever was on Richard&Judy's morning show years ago - their guest chef cooked eels in red wine sauce. If you've ever tried to cook white fish in red wine you'll know that the fish turns purply-grey. It was so disgusting that Judy spat hers out :rotfl:

Hardup_Hester

I find Mary Berry cakes are always a sucess, nothing of Jamie Oliver works for me, HFW fish pie tastes great, but cost £27 to make his way.
I never go by the cooking times in the books as my oven door doesn't fit, so the temperature is wildly erratic, I test using the 'prod & pray' method & it works for me.
H

LOOYATES

Hi, ive found over the years all those tv cookbooks dont really work for me , i go to cheap bookshops and buy those 101 pasta dish, or chinese/indian/things they only cost about 3.99 if it looks complicated or expensive i just try to ad lib a bit and that usually works out fine, lots of those fancy books ingriedients cost a bomb, maybe just to end up in the bin!!!! theres never a rubbish receipe on mse!!!!;)

lamplady

I once made a Keith Floyd curry that had 1/2 a pint of lemon juice in it. I made it as a leap of faith, rather intriguied how it would work. It didn't, and was totally inedible. Also, while I'm a good family cook, and pretty creative I cannot fry a decent steak..tried loads of tips and recipes, and very expensive steak and it's always really tough.