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Dilema....Would you do this?
Lucy1956
Posts: 2 Newbie
When I met my husband he was divorced and had two children..we married and my two step children have .been the two children I knew I could never have..I have never ever had any problems in bringing them up unlike some relationships but my husband is a mean miserable person soon found this out after a few years of marriage, however we toddled along fine.
If Im honest I dont love him any more, and stayed because of the kids who recognize him as a miserly devil .
I upped my hours at work 4 years ago to ..well basically pay there Uni fees so they didnt start there working life saddled with Student Loans etc he whining moaning grunting and screaming paid a miniscule amount towards this.
He has never received any financial support from his ex wife who has an excellent well paid job like myself and the kids never have seen her since the day she left despite lots and lots of attempts by myself and approaches from her own children she refused any contact so to all intents and purposes I am there mom and love them both equally as if I had given birth to them. and they both return my loves in millions of ways everyday.
My dilema, the kids have gotten new jobs and both have long term relationships with people my husband does not approve of and they have bought a house/flat
and are off to start there own lives which is fine I know they have bright futures in front of them. So now I consider it is my time now:j:T:j
My husbands best friend came round two days ago and said that his wife and my husband have been having an affair for 5 years and he had just found out, he isnt going to confront them till I have thought through what Im going to do....
Well I suppose its divorce yippee and splitting finances and boy will that be a battle and a half considering my husbands attitude to money.
So I have found myself a lovley 2 bedroomed cottage to rent with a small garden right by the seaside at a reasonable rent I can afford and need to furnish it and Ive done something totally out of character, I overheard my husband talking on his iPhone about moving some savings into our joint account and then transferring them to another new account..
So I have a few moments ago paid for my new flooring settee and chairs and everything from NEXT down to the teaspoons from our joint account and paid for it to be delivered Monday at my new place my sister will be there to let them in.
Tesco is delivering a huge shopping delivery to start off my new life, in a minute Im off to the hairdresser for a new short hairstyle, always have shoulder length hair, and having some ME time withe kids tonight at the theatre and a meal out all paid for by husband who would skin a banana if he though hed get 2p back on the skin.
Hes back in tommorow from his sojourn with his ladylove that was disguised as a working weekend of which there has been many more of in the past.
Lawyers appointment Tuesday 10.00am to sort out the financials after my confrontation with him when he comes home and then my new life begins.
Children are agahast at whats h es done, and told me I have made the right decision, and that whilst he is there father they consider me there mother and nothing will ever chamge there feelings for me.
So now folks hes decided to come home early as his credit card bounced lol, I cancelled his direct debit yesterday, I mean I wasnt there to enjoy his night out last week in London.
This worm has turned and shes finding it hard not screech down the phone to him about his shennanigans with my best friend, yep that makes it worse that I have chatted about him to her and still she did this ...TO BE CONTINUED just going to go have my hair cut the new moi emerges....
If Im honest I dont love him any more, and stayed because of the kids who recognize him as a miserly devil .
I upped my hours at work 4 years ago to ..well basically pay there Uni fees so they didnt start there working life saddled with Student Loans etc he whining moaning grunting and screaming paid a miniscule amount towards this.
He has never received any financial support from his ex wife who has an excellent well paid job like myself and the kids never have seen her since the day she left despite lots and lots of attempts by myself and approaches from her own children she refused any contact so to all intents and purposes I am there mom and love them both equally as if I had given birth to them. and they both return my loves in millions of ways everyday.
My dilema, the kids have gotten new jobs and both have long term relationships with people my husband does not approve of and they have bought a house/flat
and are off to start there own lives which is fine I know they have bright futures in front of them. So now I consider it is my time now:j:T:j
My husbands best friend came round two days ago and said that his wife and my husband have been having an affair for 5 years and he had just found out, he isnt going to confront them till I have thought through what Im going to do....
Well I suppose its divorce yippee and splitting finances and boy will that be a battle and a half considering my husbands attitude to money.
So I have found myself a lovley 2 bedroomed cottage to rent with a small garden right by the seaside at a reasonable rent I can afford and need to furnish it and Ive done something totally out of character, I overheard my husband talking on his iPhone about moving some savings into our joint account and then transferring them to another new account..
So I have a few moments ago paid for my new flooring settee and chairs and everything from NEXT down to the teaspoons from our joint account and paid for it to be delivered Monday at my new place my sister will be there to let them in.
Tesco is delivering a huge shopping delivery to start off my new life, in a minute Im off to the hairdresser for a new short hairstyle, always have shoulder length hair, and having some ME time withe kids tonight at the theatre and a meal out all paid for by husband who would skin a banana if he though hed get 2p back on the skin.
Hes back in tommorow from his sojourn with his ladylove that was disguised as a working weekend of which there has been many more of in the past.
Lawyers appointment Tuesday 10.00am to sort out the financials after my confrontation with him when he comes home and then my new life begins.
Children are agahast at whats h es done, and told me I have made the right decision, and that whilst he is there father they consider me there mother and nothing will ever chamge there feelings for me.
So now folks hes decided to come home early as his credit card bounced lol, I cancelled his direct debit yesterday, I mean I wasnt there to enjoy his night out last week in London.
This worm has turned and shes finding it hard not screech down the phone to him about his shennanigans with my best friend, yep that makes it worse that I have chatted about him to her and still she did this ...TO BE CONTINUED just going to go have my hair cut the new moi emerges....
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Comments
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Love hath no fury, than a woman scorned.0
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What's the question? Or did you sign up just to tell a load of strangers that you're divorcing?' <-- See that? It's called an apostrophe. It does not mean "hey, look out, here comes an S".0
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Sorry OP, would we do what?
Leave an allegedly cheating partner? Stop his credit card? Have shoulder length hair cut short? Online shop at Tesco?
Or in the middle of all this whirlwind of high drama stop and post about the minutiae on a forum?
I think i'll go with: Yes. No. Depends on your face shape. No, Asda is better value, and No.
Put your hands up.0 -
Don't understand what you want to know as you have made all these life changing decisions within a few days.
Remember money doesn't buy you happiness nor peace of mind.0 -
Wait so you cancelled his credit card when he's on a weekend away with his best mates wife yet seem surprised that he's come home early?
High five for leaving his cheating !!!! behind but I'm confused!
Oh and no I wouldn't. Short haircuts make me look like a prepubertal boy. I learned my lesson0 -
I'll go with the spirit in which the post was offered.
Your OH sounds like a total peice of work (if we take your post at face value) so good on you, i'm sure there is many a woman who wished they'd have had the nerve.
By all means keep us updated, i for one will be interested,
And good luck in your new home. Enjoy.:T,Fully paid up member of the ignore button club.If it walks like a Duck, quacks like a Duck, it's a Duck.0 -
Go Lucy. Here's a message to us all from one very strong lady. May luck be with you, it's your turn to enjoy life.Please do not quote spam as this enables it to 'live on' once the spam post is removed.
If you quote me, don't forget the capital 'M'
Declutterers of the world - unite! :rotfl::rotfl:0 -
Actually it's:Thomas_The_Tank_Top wrote: »Love hath no fury, than a woman scorned.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Hell%20Hath%20No%20FuryAn abbreviated yet famous line coined by William Congreve (1670-1729),an English playwright and poet. The entire quote reads "Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned," spoken by Perez in Act 3, Scene 2, The Mourning Bride (1697).
Contemporary usage of the phrase "Hell Hath No Fury" refers to the pinnacle of anger that has been attained by a jilted broad.
but I wouldn't argue with the sentiment.
Not really sure why the OP has joined to post this.
She doesn't appear to have a dilemma, she's already planned her future.0 -
Sounds like you're finally getting the freedom and life you need.
If I had been in the situation, I probably would have done similar and a part of me is cheering that your husband is getting what it seems he deserves.
Are you able to keep your own money separate so he has no access? I'll be looking forward to reading your next installment...:happylove0 -
Don't understand what you want to know as you have made all these life changing decisions within a few days.
Remember money doesn't buy you happiness nor peace of mind.
Not only made life changing decisions, but implemented them too!
The OP found out about the cheating on Thursday, and by mid day Saturday has secured a tenancy in a seaside property, presumably being fast tracked through the referencing process, chosen and ordered all the furniture, presumably after visiting said new home, measuring up etc, ordered her first weeks food shop, booked London theatre tickets and a restaurant, sorted out her finances, and had a new haircut.
I have to say the timeframe for achieving all the above casts doubt for me on the authenticity of the post.
I have to book at least a week in advance to get my hair cut.
Put your hands up.0
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