I want to stop drowning

debtaghh

enthusiasticsaver wrote: »

Ok so the offset amount when you take the money in savings and outstanding debt is lower than last year. That sounds like progress. I meant the new money transfer card you got in a panic last year, was it an old one? How about getting 0% deals to move cards over when the deals expire? Are you still able to do that or are you now paying interest?

Working out £400 a month towards all the above is good but sounds like a lot to find from your monthly budget along with minimum debt repayments and everyday living expenses. You already have some set aside in a savings account so perhaps deduct that from the £4800 you need over the year and divide by 12 to see if that is close to being doable within your income. You mentioned a shortfall last year on a basic month. Is this still the case?

I mentioned Brexit in particularly in relation to overseas holidays. If we go out with no deal as looks more likely now that could cause problems with air traffic restrictions, maybe visas and certainly delays with border controls until something is sorted out which could take a while. Our view is until we can see how it is working after the end of March it is safest to stick with UK breaks. Not everyone will agree but I tend to plan for worst possible scenario. Not a clue about food prices, fuel prices etc but general assumptions are being made that prices will go up.

Yes that was a card we already had that offered us a transfer.

Yes we would have a shortfall if my dh got no overtime.

I will have to sit and work all the figures out. We have three deals ending between June and October. We never seem to be eligible for new credit cards or loans.

I see what you mean about Brexit. Fingers crossed things don't increase too much.

enthusiasticsaver

debtaghh wrote: »

Thanks so much for your reply. I know what you mean as sometimes some messages do feel negative but I understand that people mean well.

I know we are in a complete mess and I change my mind daily with regards to what the best option is.

None of us mean to respond negatively debtaghh but perhaps some of the posts are abrupt so I hope I have not caused you more grief. That is not what the diaries section is for. I have counselled many people in a debt spiral though which is what I was concerned you were in. Now many I counselled had mortgages with arrears so my primary aim was to get them back on track with that to avoid them losing their home. You rent but that does not mean you are still not in a precarious position but I think you know that. Reading your posts and not suggesting ways to get your finances in order seems counter productive and to be fair you have taken on board much of the advice. You are now working, you are not using credit cards at the moment, you are working out a budget and being frugal with food shopping. Those are all good things so don't let us giving you grief about holidays etc detract from that

enthusiasticsaver

debtaghh wrote: »

Yes that was a card we already had that offered us a transfer.

Yes we would have a shortfall if my dh got no overtime.

I will have to sit and work all the figures out. We have three deals ending between June and October. We never seem to be eligible for new credit cards or loans.

I see what you mean about Brexit. Fingers crossed things don't increase too much.

There will also most certainly be currency fluctuations meaning everything overseas will be even more expensive as our pound won't buy as much foreign currency. Yes, fingers crossed.

debtaghh

Thanks for all the advice as I really do appreciate it.

I do think I need to sit down again and do some number crunching.

We were thinking of applying for a loan through my dh's employment, not sure if we would be eligible but it would be 6.9%apr and could clear the theee credit cards that we would then close. What do you think? The repayment would be pretty much what we pay now on the minimums for those three and be for 5 years.

enthusiasticsaver

It all seems very stressful for you with relying on overtime to make the budget balance, the general uncertainty of renting and family who are demanding repayment. I can see what silver queen means though in that if you are booking holidays but owe them money maybe they feel things aren't so bad. Unfortunately this is another downside of borrowing from relatives. They think it gives them carte Blanche to criticise and cause you upset. Is the reason that doing a DMP would not help is because they won't take the family debt into consideration? I think this must be awful for your anxiety issues and undoubtedly affecting your health.

You really must put it out of your head you are a failure. I think you had children young which will affect your living standards. My daughters were chatting about house prices during the Christmas get togethers and both expressed gratitude for our help in getting them on the housing ladder both in terms of financial help or letting them live at home rent free after uni so they could save. My eldest does not have children and is early 30s and my youngest was married and had bought her first house with her husband before having her children. They both said the friends of theirs who have managed to buy all had parental help of some sort and did not have children until after buying a home. The few couples they know who started a family early and had no family assistance have had to rent and probably will have to for a long time maybe forever. Childcare costs, high costs of rent mean sometimes debt is incurred to tide you over and before you know where you are it is going up bit by bit until it gets to a level you cannot ignore which I think is where you are. So much of your income is going on debt repayments it is making it difficult to live. No one wants to think having kids early is a mistake but it makes life harder no matter how much you love them. That does not make you a failure, just fallible as we all can be.

enthusiasticsaver

debtaghh wrote: »

Thanks for all the advice as I really do appreciate it.

I do think I need to sit down again and do some number crunching.

We were thinking of applying for a loan through my dh's employment, not sure if we would be eligible but it would be 6.9%apr and could clear the theee credit cards that we would then close. What do you think? The repayment would be pretty much what we pay now on the minimums for those three and be for 5 years.

Normally I would not recommend debt consolidation so I suppose it comes down to maths. If they are at 0% and you are able to get another 0% deal in June when the first comes up I would say no. If you cannot get a deal and the interest goes up very high then yes go for the loan. You must and I absolutely say must close the cards down though.

wishingthemortgaheaway

Long time lurker (possibly posted previously)

I'm not sure whether this is a good suggestion or not (some with more expertise than I please shoot me down in a hail of bullets if this is the case but...

If you can get a loan or if you use the 'savings' you have, would you be better paying off the family debts? These seem to be the cause of much emotional stress, and one of the things preventing you from going down the dmp route - as I'm sure people say family loans are not taken into consideration.

Wish.

debtaghh

Yes we did have children very young.

This is causing me a lot of stress, depression and anxiety.

Yes, the dmp wouldn't include family repayments. I tried to increase other areas as advised but it still wasn't adding up. I just remember thinking that we wouldn't be that much better off doing a dmp.

My barclaycard tend to offer me 0% deals so maybe we should wait until the other credit card deals are due to expire and see where we are at.

I will spend time looking at figures and trying to work a realistic plan out... if there is one.

Silver_Queen

I think it'll be hard for anyone to give you proper advice without knowing the ins and outs of all the % and balances. My one warning is that I wouldn't want you to take out a loan to consolidate and end up spending more - with a budget as tight as yours it'll be hard not to give into temptation of giving yourself a little more breathing space.

debtaghh

I think I'll wait and see how much we can clear before the deals end and see if we get any offers on our current cards.

I will work out some more figures not including any overtime and see where it stands.