I want to stop drowning

enthusiasticsaver

Good challenges. Writing every penny down makes you think twice about what and where you are spending. It is a shame for you to expend so much energy being careful but not making strides forward because of lapses. You are not alone though. Keeping within budget is hard especially with very little leeway. I honestly think for you cold turkey is best. No credit cards and a DMP.

debtaghh

I think I'm going to cut the credit cards up.

I really need to change things and fast.

enthusiasticsaver

Well done. Make sure you have some emergency savings. Holidays, Xmas and car bits can be saved for especially if you go down the DMP route.

Silver_Queen

Hi Debtaghh. To be completely honest with you, I think I agree that you have not properly had your LBM. I have no judgement for you because I don't think I truly have, either.

I think that enthusiasticsaver is right - drastic action is required but it sounds like you're getting on with it.

Good luck and hope you have a lovely Christmas.

Spendy_Spenderson

I agree, I don't think you had truly had your LBM. Not meaning to be harsh but I still don't think you've had it yet.


Setting challenges are great for motivation. Writing down every penny and shopping at Aldi will all help you keep costs down and budget. But with a +£500 deficit between what you are bringing in each month, and your basic monthly outgoings, I feel that even with all your hard work and endeavor, it will not be enough to balance the budget - let alone reduce debt.


I really hope you consider the dmp route as think this will be so much better for your mindset and will allow you to get rid of the cards, save for all the things you deserve to have and see the debt finally start to go down. Maybe food for thought in the New Year.


In the meantime I hope you get to enjoy some time off work celebrating with your family and wish you a very merry Christmas!

enthusiasticsaver

I agree with the comments above. I think you want to get the debt down but after a while you lose heart and loosen the purse strings again. Holidays seem to be your downfall I guess because you see them as an escape and want to make memories with your children. As I said you are not alone but it is more critical with you than others because of the shortfall and high level of debt. I just really don't want to see you struggling with this for the next 20 years or so and hope you can find your resolve (and your DH too as you did not get to this position alone) and really start to get control of your finances. This is no way to live with so much of your disposable income going on repaying debt every month and still it does not go down. Let 2019 be the year you start to make a difference.

sweetpea26

debtaghh wrote: »

I think I'm going to cut the credit cards up.

I really need to change things and fast.

You have now had your lightbulb moment Debtagh :T

You have been given some excellent advice above...please now act on it.

debtaghh

Instead of using the credit card I used cash for the food shop and went to Aldi... little progress better than none

enthusiasticsaver

Well done on not using the credit card.

Working_Mum

debtaghh wrote: »

Instead of using the credit card I used cash for the food shop and went to Aldi... little progress better than none

Exactly - this is how you chip away at poor behaviours and debt! Well done. I found I had to make it a fun thing to do so tracking my spends every day in a gorgeous notebook is a mindful practice and keeps me focussed. I regularly remind Myself it didn't take 5 minutes to get into debt and it will take time to get out.

I have set some time aside between Christmas and New Year to take stock of my debt reduction for 2018 and set some meaningful goals for 2019.