I want to stop drowning

debtaghh

Our shortfall is about £230 but will be more from next sep. although if we get the minimums down that will help. The shortfall isn't every month as my husband gets overtime.

My biggest issue is when we have spare money I never know whether I should save it or clear extra debt.

motivated

debtaghh wrote: »

Our shortfall is about £230 but will be more from next sep. although if we get the minimums down that will help. The shortfall isn't every month as my husband gets overtime.

My biggest issue is when we have spare money I never know whether I should save it or clear extra debt.

Hi debtaghh
With the extra money why don't you split it in two and pay half to the debt and save half. Kill two birds with one stone. Even if it's a small amount it will soon build up. When you have x amount treat you and hubby to a meal or a cinema or even a takeaway and a movie at home. You won't feel guilty when you do that then.

It could be a little challenge for you to aim towards.

Keep going onwards and downwards with the debt :A
M

debtaghh

Morning,

I had a bit of a cry yesterday with my dh about money. I've been up early trying to work things out. I really don't want to do a dmp etc due to several reasons. One thing that I do need to do is up my income. Even with cutting back the debt won't go as my income is still too low. From next Sep my dd will be in full time education and will have wrap around care available which would make it easier for me to work longer hours. From 1st Jan I will write every expense down and shop back at Aldi and not do top up shops. When I started to do this last year I really noticed a difference. I will re evaluate in six months and I'm writing it here that this is it, if things haven't improved significantly in six months then I will just have to accept a dmp is my only option. Please quote me on this! I will try and make the cheapest meals possible and not commit to as many social things. We haven't been given a pass for days out which I'm planning on using lots! We have also been given restaurant vouchers which we can use next year. I know some people might not agree and think I should do a dmp now but I have to do what I think is best and what I'm most comfortable with. But this is it. If by the end June we are no better then I will give up with this idea.

enthusiasticsaver

Only you know what will work for you. I just worry that your situation will not improve and at some point you will be forced into it anyway due to rising minimums, shortfall being too much, reduced income or no overtime for your DH. As you said though last year you were bringing the debt down by being more careful with your spending. Upping your income is a good idea if you can do it.

I suggest you cut the cards up or lock them away so you are not tempted to use them when you are short of money. Save the extra you get to tide you over the months when your DH has no overtime and you have a shortfall. Save for Xmas, holidays (if you have booked one) and a car maintenance fund.

Sorry this is causing you so much stress and I think the reason most of us are suggesting the DMP is because it will be less stressful for you in the long run.

debtaghh

I won't be using the credit cards and decided I will only do balance transfers if they are a minimum of a year and I'm paying interest on other cards and no more money transfers!

enthusiasticsaver

Please do remember though you have been battling this debt for years, read your first post again on this diary from 2016. I haven't looked at your old posts from when you joined MSE in 2009 but I would hazard a guess that these were about your debt situation too. Unless you really have had your LBM what has changed for you to be able to sort this out now without a DMP? Do you total the debt figures somewhere and record them? I know you used to find it depressing putting it on your signature but admitting how it has risen in the last 10 years may give you the jolt you need to stop booking holidays etc or whatever it is you are being tempted to spend on.

I wish all the luck and determination in the world though as I really want things to get better for you.

debtaghh

I have had a lot of changes since I started including more children and mental health issues. I still have some of these issues but hoping I'm on the mend hence being able to go back to work.

enthusiasticsaver

debtaghh wrote: »

I have had a lot of changes since I started including more children and mental health issues. I still have some of these issues but hoping I'm on the mend hence being able to go back to work.

:):) Best of luck. You deserve a pat on the back for going back to work.

debtaghh

Morning,

Hope you all had a lovely Christmas. My dh and I both got a text on Christmas Day from our credit card company saying we are near our limit! This was a stark reminder that I want this debt gone. I'm going to focus on one credit card at a time , I'll look at my spreadsheet to see which deal is ending first. I said this last year but then give up after a while.

Next year I need to:

Log all expenses
Focus on one debt at a time rather than stressing about the whole debt
Try and be as frugal as I can and think before I buy anything.

Not money related:

I need to lose more weight esp weight gained!
Spend more time with my family
Stop letting my mental health issue effect me so much.
Think before I speak more as it's gets me into trouble!

I need to make sure I do this all year and not just for a month or two.

debtaghh

Happy new year!

I have been thinking a lot about money and it's simple I need to earn more! Yes I have debt and of course I don't want it but likewise ( ppl may not agree) if I want to have the odd treat and a holiday then I feel that I should be able to. Our debt has come from lots of reasons including having our dd at a young age, moving out early due to family situations and yes maybe the odd UK holiday that we couldn't afford but if you look around our house we seriously have minimal clothing , technology that's over a decade old. My constant low income hasn't helped our situation. I read a diary yesterday and to be honest I feel the same as that person. People on here might disagree that I shouldn't go on holidays or go to the cinema twice a year etc but the fact is that our debt is going to take years to go and I'm not letting my kids grow up and then have regrets. Yes I will be savvy and yes I will shop around for a bargain but enough is enough with me kicking off because my friend spends £10 less on water a month than me or because they use less toilet paper then us! This is really affecting me mentally, I've allowed this money situation to take over my life. Yes I will look for a new job and still try and be careful but likewise I'm not going to be annoyed with myself if I buy something.

I know not everyone will agree but I have to do what works for me and my family x