Cash wedding present - how much?

Meepmeep

Be good to have some different opinions on how much should I give as a cash wedding gift for a wedding we are off to next month.
I'm the bride's friend and she / they've invited me and my other half (despite not knowing him which is very generous of them). There is no gift list as such (the couple already own their own place with it furnished. Already have a toaster :p). They have said that if people want to contribute to their honeymoon fund then they would happily receive cash.

I don't have a problem with the cash part, I'd probably struggle to think of something else they'd like. Issue is - how much?!?

I'm currently going through a bit of a particularly tight patch (just found out going to have to cough up for IVF and about to move). Plus, I am one of those people who is generally quite frugal. I don't go overboard with gifts etc. yes, in other words I'm tight

So how much you think is ok / what should I consider when trying to decide?

gettingtheresometime

However much you'd normally spend on a wedding present.

If she's your friend she'll know about the Ivf / move

baza52

If they are feeding you and providing drinks think of it like going out for a meal.
£50?

ybfe

I always give around £50 if I know them really really well but if its like a friend of the family £30

Mupette

I went to my friends wedding beginning of the month, I could of wrote what you did.

I gave her £50 she was very happy with that, she knows we are not well off.

Jamiesmum

50 is way too much surely? Why would you give someone so much money just for getting married?

I don't even give that to family at birthdays/christmas, let alone a friend being married.

baza52

Jamiesmum wrote: »

50 is way too much surely? Why would you give someone so much money just for getting married?

I don't even give that to family at birthdays/christmas, let alone a friend being married.

So if they paid to feed you and your partner and also paid for your drinks you think £50 is over the top?

gettingtheresometime

baza52 wrote: »

So if they paid to feed you and your partner and also paid for your drinks you think £50 is over the top?

But surely by taking your attitude, you're simply paying for your meal?

As I said before give what you give normally as a gift and don't think anymore of it

baza52

gettingtheresometime wrote: »

But surely by taking your attitude, you're simply paying for your meal?

As I said before give what you give normally as a gift and don't think anymore of it

Well the bride and groom have paid for your meal as well as the reception etc so in effect paying for a day out for you.

If you went out for dinner with them and the bill was £100 for 4 would you contribute your cost or just chuck in a tenner.

Torry_Quine

I don't like this idea that you should cover the cost, its two separate things to me. If a couple want to invite me to their wedding how much it costs is up to them. Likewise how much I spend on a gift is up to me. Personally I think £50 is a very generous gift but it depends on your circumstances

Meepmeep

Thanks for your replies.
Your points are all very valid and are in line with what I've been mulling over.
On one hand, yup I see the point of - they've invited you and paying for a meal so could view it as - cover that amount.
Then again - I wouldn't choose to spend £x on travel to wedding, and/or cost of over night stay, plus cost of hen do, plus meal. That's about 160 there already.

Thing is, I really don't like weddings generally. This one will be ok as I know a few people there and it's only a day. But I've been clenching my jaw a bit at the costs of other weddings we've forked out for. Yes it's great that x and x want to get married in Italy, but that weekend cost us 1k. I think I just don't get why people want to spend SO much on a day.

I know I'm going off on a tangent - but I guess what I mean is, I'm already coming from a mindset of feeling Grrrrrrrr about weddings, so wanted to make sure I wasn't being too stingy