For the female workers.

theoretica

Some comments from management on looks are entirely appropriate and work relevant, assuming they want their staff to look smart and well presented, and I don't think this should just be negative comments when someone isn't.

xapprenticex

Detroit wrote: »

I must admit, I'm curious about the motivation of the boss here. I'd like to know what she actually said, as there's a big difference between a casual 'you look smart today xapprenticex' to a comment that implies she finds him attractive, and is flirting.
I assumed we were talking about the first, but it occurred to me it may be the latter, which would put a different slant on things.
If OP thinks she is flirting with him, this could become very awkward indeed!

No no, its totally professional, no funny business, and for the other person who commented, no wrong ends of sticks involved. I'm not saying she loves me and I love her (though she is very attractive), I'm JUST asking if its appropriate to compliment her should the situation arise (More so, how would you feel?).

Its a male dominated place and I dont want to give the impression I only see her looks, Something like, nice dress, nice hair etc, NOT oh you look hawt!!. Give me some credit guys hehe

mariposa687

I'd just leave it. Sometimes my colleagues have said 'Have you had your haircut? It looks nice' etc 'you look nice today' 'that's a nice dress' but it doesn't mean anything. People are just being friendly. Anything flirtatious would seriously creep me out!One of my colleagues once made some comment in the pub about how he could tell I went to the gym and I felt physically sick. This was in the pub, though, not the office.I now try to avoid him in the office I don't understand why you are so worried about complimenting her? Why risk creating an awkward atmosphere?

xapprenticex

mariposa687 wrote: »

I'd just leave it. Sometimes my colleagues have said 'Have you had your haircut? It looks nice' etc 'you look nice today' 'that's a nice dress' but it doesn't mean anything. People are just being friendly. Anything flirtatious would seriously creep me out!One of my colleagues once made some comment in the pub about how he could tell I went to the gym and I felt physically sick. This was in the pub, though, not the office.I now try to avoid him in the office I don't understand why you are so worried about complimenting her? Why risk creating an awkward atmosphere?

Yeah I've heard some funny horror stories about the antics at the pub where colleagues are involved, kind of glad i don't drink, put it that way.

Ill just leave it, you're quite right there, thanks.

gunsandbanjos

Callie22 wrote: »

Tbh, I think it's a bit odd for a senior boss to be complimenting more junior staff on their looks anyway, male or female.

Why? My senior (female) manager told me (also female) that she really liked my hair the other week.

It's what normal people do, we get on really well across the team and it didn't seem out of the ordinary at all.

Callie22

gunsandbanjos wrote: »

Why? My senior (female) manager told me (also female) that she really liked my hair the other week.

It's what normal people do, we get on really well across the team and it didn't seem out of the ordinary at all.

I took what the OP said to mean specifically 'looks' - so commenting on someone's 'attractiveness' iyswim. A comment on someone's new haircut or new dress is absolutely normal and all part of office life (yesterday I had a LOT of hair cut off and I'm completely expecting endless comments at work tomorrow ...) but there is a line - 'Sue, that's a really pretty dress' or 'Jane, your hair looks fab' is totally different from 'Sue, you look really attractive in that dress' or 'Jane, your new haircut is really sexy'. Obviously either of those could be said in an innocent, friendly way from colleague to colleague but if a senior person said either to a more junior member of staff then it'd be weird, imo.

robatwork

One of the most bottom-clenching threads I've read on these forums.

The rule is - don't dip your pen in the company ink.

cadon

I once had a senior member of staff compliment my outfit, which I took really positively because I think her sense of style is fantastic, and it meant something coming from her. I wouldn't have been offended had a man made the same comment, but it wouldn't have meant anything to me as none of them are my office fashion heroes!

If someone is wearing a new outfit or has had a new haircut, I don't think there's anything wrong with a sideways "that really suits you" before bringing the conversation back to something work related.

Ozzuk

I think it really depends what she actually said to you. She could be trying to bolster your confidence, bring you out of yourself. She could be doing it in a creepy predator type way (not as in the alien predator, though be careful if she starts clicking). She could have just liked your shirt or cut of your suit.

Either way, she's the boss, unless I had a very friendly open relationship with her I'd be keeping my pretty little mouth closed.

KiKi

I'd be fine with it, if it was friendly and appropriate, and it was acceptable in my workplace.