Just can't wait toilet card.

iammumtoone

fed_up_and_stressed wrote: »

I was the person who raised about the kids in the disabled loos. I ask if they are disabled and are unable to use the non disabled loo and 9/10 times get told no. I was referring to people who admit they were just using them out of convenience actually in my original post about it - hence my stating about them saying they prefer to go in together - ie a choice to misuse the disabled loo not a need to use it.

I have a key for my son, I don't tend to use it as being a child I either take him in the ladies with me or if they are busy he is old enough to run to the mens, if they are busy then only then will we use the disabled (it is rare).

If on coming out of it someone asked me if he was disabled I would reply no. I certainly do not want him to think he is disabled that wouldn't do his confidence (which is already low regarding toileting issues) any good at all.

However he has been assessed by a doctor to be allowed a key so we are doing nothing wrong in using a disabled toilet if necessary.

Maybe the mothers in question feel the same no child wants to be labelled as 'disabled' and I am sure the mothers do not wish to go into a detailed explained why their child is entitled to use a disabled toilet to a stranger.

The amount of time taken is no indicator either maybe some people waiting for us would think we have both taken the time to go, but in fact the reason would be the fact my child is having to change himself and clean himself after an accident.

Sorry but it does bug me that people think only people with visible disabilities should be allowed to use the disabled toilets, especially when a mother and child come out.

fed_up_and_stressed

iammumtoone wrote: »

I have a key for my son, I don't tend to use it as being a child I either take him in the ladies with me or if they are busy he is old enough to run to the mens, if they are busy then only then will we use the disabled (it is rare).

If on coming out of it someone asked me if he was disabled I would reply no. I certainly do not want him to think he is disabled that wouldn't do his confidence (which is already low regarding toileting issues) any good at all.

However he has been assessed by a doctor to be allowed a key so we are doing nothing wrong in using a disabled toilet if necessary.

You obviously missed or glossed over my point where I also ask if it is necessary for the person to use the disabled toilet. It has bog all to do whether the disability is visible or not (excuse the pun).

Maybe the mothers in question feel the same no child wants to be labelled as 'disabled' and I am sure the mothers do not wish to go into a detailed explained why their child is entitled to use a disabled toilet to a stranger.

The amount of time taken is no indicator either maybe some people waiting for us would think we have both taken the time to go, but in fact the reason would be the fact my child is having to change himself and clean himself after an accident.

Sorry but it does bug me that people think only people with visible disabilities should be allowed to use the disabled toilets, especially when a mother and child come out.

Please stop being so judgmental. I have never said I accost based purely on time spent or if disabilties are visible. In fact it tends to be when I am sat there waiting when I can clearly hear the little bleeders using it as a defacto changing room to show off their purchases to their "mates" in a group setting.

You obviously missed or ignored my remark about asking whether there was a need to use the disabiled toilet. It has bog all to do with whether a disability is visible (excuse the pun).

iammumtoone

fed_up_and_stressed wrote: »

You obviously missed or ignored my remark about asking whether there was a need to use the disabiled toilet. It has bog all to do with whether a disability is visible (excuse the pun).

I didn't miss your remark about asking for the need, thats why I replied.

If you asked me that question I would lie and say we shouldn't have used it, there is no way I would explain my sons toileting problems or admit he has a need to use it to a stranger in front of him.

I do understand what you are saying, I am quite sure you do get parents that use the toilet for convenience and adults without children as well, there is no denying that must be very annoying/upsetting for you having to wait when you shouldn't have to.

I just wanted to make my point that asking the question if someone is entitled isn't always going to give you the correct answer so you are left thinking that, that person shouldn't have used it when in fact they were entitled.

Andypandyboy

I don't think anyone should be asked.

It is a very personal issue, just because the disability isn't visible doesn't mean it isn't there. It is very rude to so in my opinion, be they adult or child.

TheNickster

dekaspace wrote: »

Do you understand autism?

The autism part means I only go when I need to go, but I also have issues due to diet which mean I can feel fine all day then feel gas and have to rush to toilet, I was given tablets for it as doctor things its minor IBS.

And I mistinterpret the signs, I can feel like going (in the words they call for a tinkle) a lot but when I go to toilet nothing happens so I wait until I know for a fact I need to to.

And FYI I am not talking about going to a busy disablity toilet but lets say I am in a shopping centre and theres a long queue for the regular toilets and none for disability it would help me to go to the disability one.

And back to the autism side I can get distressed waiting to point my heart is beating so fast.

If I go to bar I am the opposite I keep going every few minutes and nothing happens so I can't tell when I need to go unless I really am ready to burst.

FYI I have also lost control of my body functions due to this but its rare only because I rarely leave the house and when I do its short distance so I don't go to large shopping centres much.

Are psychological conditions not valid?

If I were you I would ring the B&BF help line and ask them whether they consider your condition means you are eligible. I would take their opinion on whether you need a card, rather than some of those giving 'advice' on here who, to my mind, seem a bit pedantic. Helpline: 0845 345 0165

Ian011

TheNickster wrote: »

Helpline: 0845 345 0165

Beware the 0845 number is premium rate and their website fails to give the required call cost declaration.

theoretica

iammumtoone wrote: »

If you asked me that question I would lie and say we shouldn't have used it, there is no way I would explain my sons toileting problems or admit he has a need to use it to a stranger in front of him.

That surprises me as it would then seem to be telling your son it is OK to use special resources you don't need.

It is perfectly possible to answer the question without giving any details 'of course I/we don't monopolise things without need' - I would probably add very firmly 'and I don't discuss personal details in public'.

On the opposite side I find myself irritated by signs which say 'disabled entrance' when they mean level/ramp entrance - plenty of disabled people can climb stairs.

iammumtoone

theoretica wrote: »

That surprises me as it would then seem to be telling your son it is OK to use special resources you don't need.
.

A valid point to be honest I hadn't thought of that.

Of course this is all hypothetical as we have never been questioned when coming out of the disabled toilets (plenty of stares but nothing ever said).

cherry_o'neal

Oh no I really feel for' deskaspace', having to defend himself from the rather negative comments from some posters. I feel that the idea of such a card is a good one. Good luck with getting one. XX

Fluffybunny80

Kids and disabled loos - very often the changing table is also in with the disabled loo. So often us parents have no choice but to go in there, and it can take a while to change a screaming toddler especially when they've had an explosive poop and you have to clean them up, change them etc.

I use disabled loos anyhow as I need too due to my disabilities but also have to change my son in them often.

But must say M&S and John Lewis are very good and have separate baby changing/breast feeding rooms ��

Think the main point here is consideration for others and when a disability is 'invisible' obvious disabled resold