SOA please offer advice.

Anoneemoose

I have just read the thread and whilst I haven't anything constructive to help OP with, I do want to say, I think you need to wind your neck in. How on Earth do you know OP's circumstances? How do you know that when she was with her ex, they weren't wealthy enough at the time to 'afford' 7 kids?? Before the ex's bankruptcy (which can happen for many reasons). Even if they weren't, you still don't know anything about OP, so if you're not going to post something helpful, you really should just jog on and keep on reading your Daily Mail.

kimplus8

FYI when I had my first 7 I was in a position to not need tax credits etc, we owned a beautiful home and I married a staunch Catholic. Like I said above my baby was not conceived on purpose.
To answer your other question, my kids may not grow up to be scientists or Olympic medalists but maybe they will be the nurse or doctor that treats you in old age, or the checkout person being polite to you or even the bin person that takes your trash but..... They will have a strong work ethic just like myself, pay tax like myself and be empathetic and courteous unlike yourself.
Good day

Time_to_face_the_music

kimplus8 wrote: »

Water rates............................. 60

Hi kimplus8 :hello:

Have you got a water meter? If not you should definitely have one fitted as you would be eligible for the WaterSure scheme which would cap your water rates considerably lower than you are paying now.

Take on board the good advice already given re DRO, bulk cooking, packed lunches, yellow sticker bargains etc and ignore the Daily Fail readers, these forums are great when you manage to just laugh at their comments :rotfl:

Some fantastic advice on Old Style forum about cheap meal planning and saving money on cleaning products etc.

Good luck, you sound determined to sort this.

TTFTM x

meer53

Jon_B wrote: »

This is a real toughie.

I think it's clear that 8 kids is what is making this inherently difficult.

It may seem a bit radical, but is there no possibility half your kids could live with their Dad?

Are you living alone? You state you split with your ex 2 years ago, yet you have your eighth child due imminently. I know a bit about the birds and bees, but there has to be someone else involved and who can therefore either be living with you/helping.

The OP has posted asking for help. Of course it's going to be difficult with 8 children. But thats not going to change, the children are here, the OP needs sensible advice, not suggestions that "half" the children live somewhere else ! How would that help ?

mumtoomany

With regard to school trips, I was always led to believe ( while working in a school until two years ago) that if a trip takes place during school hours, then the money asked for is a voluntary contribution. Schools do not advertise this. Try speaking to someone at the school and ask. Can the children using the bus get free passes? It used to be if you lived more than two miles I think. Keep up the good work, M2m.

Jon_B_2

meer53 wrote: »

The OP has posted asking for help. Of course it's going to be difficult with 8 children. But thats not going to change, the children are here, the OP needs sensible advice, not suggestions that "half" the children live somewhere else ! How would that help ?

Is that a deliberately stupid question? Less children, less cost.

I'm not asking if sending them off to a remote island in the Pacific would be a good idea. It takes two to make a baby - if the dad were able it would be helpful if they could take custody (temporary or otherwise) of some of the children to reduce some financial burden.

Commenting on a SOA on a thread like this is futile and pointless. We can sit here and pretend that 8 children isn't the problem, but the fundamentals are that even with a DRO wiping the debt away, day to day life won't be any easier.

Apologies I can't be all fluffy and whimsical offering pie in the sky solutions, but when I spend more in childcare a month for my one child than the OP earns looking after 8, expect a frank and honest answer.

missbiggles1

mumtoomany wrote: »

With regard to school trips, I was always led to believe ( while working in a school until two years ago) that if a trip takes place during school hours, then the money asked for is a voluntary contribution. Schools do not advertise this. Try speaking to someone at the school and ask. Can the children using the bus get free passes? It used to be if you lived more than two miles I think. Keep up the good work, M2m.

The OP already receives a large amount of state support to pay for her to bring up her children, which would include things like school uniform and school trips.

kimplus8

Time_to_face_the_music wrote: »

Hi kimplus8 :hello:

Have you got a water meter? If not you should definitely have one fitted as you would be eligible for the WaterSure scheme which would cap your water rates considerably lower than you are paying now.

Take on board the good advice already given re DRO, bulk cooking, packed lunches, yellow sticker bargains etc and ignore the Daily Fail readers, these forums are great when you manage to just laugh at their comments :rotfl:

Some fantastic advice on Old Style forum about cheap meal planning and saving money on cleaning products etc.

Good luck, you sound determined to sort this.

TTFTM x

Thanks for this, a friend of mine told me about watersure so Ive just called them for the application pack, just awaiting my latest tax credits and child benefit letter as we have moved house and completed the renewal and then ill have all the info to send off with it, should reduce my bill to £46 so I'm told :-)

kimplus8

mumtoomany wrote: »

With regard to school trips, I was always led to believe ( while working in a school until two years ago) that if a trip takes place during school hours, then the money asked for is a voluntary contribution. Schools do not advertise this. Try speaking to someone at the school and ask. Can the children using the bus get free passes? It used to be if you lived more than two miles I think. Keep up the good work, M2m.

School trips- I have asked before but it seems the concensus at my kids school is that if you are working then you pay full price, I would always contribute but a 3 day residential coming in at £180 is so expensive for me, and all 4 at school have been doing some queens birthday thing that was £10 each, plus mufty days and my other 2 going to the zoo class trip and local farm trip, I guess to the school they look cheap individually but for me to take the hit of all that is so hard.
I will speak to the school, I guess I feel guilty as it always says on the letters that there are subsidised rates for low income families but that if enough parents don't pay full price it will be cancelled, I don't want to be 'that' parent that cant do it and has the trip cancelled.
The bus fair is set, its 3 miles from school to get a bus pass here and we live just shy of that sadly.
thanks for your fab advice, I will speak to reception at school on Monday.

kimplus8

Jon_B wrote: »

Is that a deliberately stupid question? Less children, less cost.

I'm not asking if sending them off to a remote island in the Pacific would be a good idea. It takes two to make a baby - if the dad were able it would be helpful if they could take custody (temporary or otherwise) of some of the children to reduce some financial burden.

Commenting on a SOA on a thread like this is futile and pointless. We can sit here and pretend that 8 children isn't the problem, but the fundamentals are that even with a DRO wiping the debt away, day to day life won't be any easier.

Apologies I can't be all fluffy and whimsical offering pie in the sky solutions, but when I spend more in childcare a month for my one child than the OP earns looking after 8, expect a frank and honest answer.

I get what you are saying Jon B , but how do you suppose which half of my children I would send away??
While I get the half the kids=half the cost its doesn't really work like that in real life does it, like I said its not an option for me.
I am sorry you feel wronged that I earn less than you pay in childcare but at one point I was working full time and paying £2000 a month in childcare to 'keep up with the joneses' with my ex, all that led to was a exhausted mommy, upset and rejected feeling kids and a family situation that led to my ex loosing it with myself and the kids.
I will not work full time until they are at school, you may not agree with that but for my sanity (I'm bi-polar) and my kids wellbeing I am making the best decision for us right now.
I will make this work, It will be tough but I will do it and do it well.
thanks for the advice. :-)