1st time pregnancy - Head Vs Heart

Beckyy

I'm going to mirror what other have said. I would cut back on the wedding and bring it forward, enjoy married life for a bit and use some of wedding money you've saved on the house then think about starting a family. It might take 1 month or 100 months to fall pregnant, I don't think there's ever a right time but there are times which are better than others.

74jax

If you want a baby now and have looked at the finance then I would use your wage each month to pay off your debt (this way getting used to one wage) bring the wedding forward, have baby.

missbiggles1

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

I'm not.

Get married first. It'll be the last time you're guaranteed to have a waist *that* small or boobs *that* high.

Because, obviously, how you look on your wedding day is the most important thing to think about when getting married.:D

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Because, obviously, how you look on your wedding day is the most important thing to think about when getting married.:D

Nope, it isn't - but everybody else seems to have covered the 'it's the right way round', 'same surname' and 'could you still afford to get married if you've got a baby?' parts.

Chances are it's an expensive wedding if it needs saving for - that means the dress is going to be significantly dearer if it has to accommodate a bump or need to be sold and bought in a different size following a baby. Spending the wedding day chucking up with hyperemesis, waddling around like a Thames Barge or having a screaming tot to worry about doesn't appeal to me either. Again, I think these have all been covered.

And then you get to the photos. If they wait to have a baby just a little while longer, she knows exactly what she is going to look like in photos that she will be seeing for the rest of her life. There are no guarantees that she'll particularly like them if she's changed significantly since having a baby - I know of lots of people who wished they'd never had any photos for that reason.


And I thought it might also help to point out that even people who aren't traditional in outlook also think it's better to wait until after the wedding to have a baby, even if it's a pretty lighthearted reason I gave...

skimper

Thanks for all your input

We have decided to wait till after the wedding, in the grand scheme of things were not in a huge rush to have a baby.

I think i would like to enjoy a kid free Wedding/Honeymoon & enjoy the last year and a bit of just the two of us

indiepanda

skimper wrote: »

Thanks for all your input

We have decided to wait till after the wedding, in the grand scheme of things were not in a huge rush to have a baby.

I think i would like to enjoy a kid free Wedding/Honeymoon & enjoy the last year and a bit of just the two of us

Think you've made the right choice, it's not like you are late thirties and having to worry about fertility issues if you delay a couple of years.

I had a friend who was planning to get married after the birth... then they realized legally it was better to be married when the baby was born so had a tiny registry office wedding, just a few close family members - no friends, and planned to have big party a few months post birth. It never happened - my friend found being a mum quite tough at first and she didn't have the energy to organise so they've never celebrated their wedding with friends.

Ultimately for them it was probably the right choice to go for baby first as husband is early fifties and my friend late thirties, but you've been lucky enough to meet your fiance when you were much younger.