Separating- can husband walk in house whenever he likes?

tea_lover

Person_one wrote: »

He's already threatening the OP though that when he does he plans to come back as and when he wants! I can't believe for a second that you'd really be ok with that in her shoes?

Maybe, hopefully, when he actually moves out and things are calmer he'll realise what a d*ck move it would be and won't actually do it.

Maybe he wants to be able to see his children without making an appointment.

Person_one

tea_lover wrote: »

Maybe he wants to be able to see his children without making an appointment.

All he has to do is knock, like the OP did when the situation was reversed:

dobs wrote: »

When we separated before and I left the house I never walked in, I always knocked and waited

missbiggles1

Person_one wrote: »

He's already threatening the OP though that when he does he plans to come back as and when he wants! I can't believe for a second that you'd really be ok with that in her shoes?

Maybe, hopefully, when he actually moves out and things are calmer he'll realise what a d*ck move it would be and won't actually do it.

I was referring to posters' comments which were judging a situation which doesn't even exist yet.

One person's threat is another person's statement of fact.

maman

I can understand this situation from both sides.


OP doesn't want to feel that her ex can just walk in unannounced but he doesn't want to have to knock on his own front door.


I think instead of over reaction (because we're unaware of any violence or other potential issues) like injunctions or changing locks and putting chains on etc. or even bullying and barging in unannounced if good manners would prevail on both sides then they could at least try to sort this out amicably.


I can see where guest is coming from because there does often seem to be an anti-men bias on this and similar threads.

Person_one

maman wrote: »

I can understand this situation from both sides.


OP doesn't want to feel that her ex can just walk in unannounced but he doesn't want to have to knock on his own front door.


I think instead of over reaction (because we're unaware of any violence or other potential issues) like injunctions or changing locks and putting chains on etc. or even bullying and barging in unannounced if good manners would prevail on both sides then they could at least try to sort this out amicably.


I can see where guest is coming from because there does often seem to be an anti-men bias on this and similar threads.

I agree with most of your post, but as to the last line, it only seems that way to some because we get an awful lot of women posting on here trying to deal with problems caused by men behaving badly.

The odd time there is a male poster in the same boat with a woman behaving badly towards them they get plenty of support too (and an inevitable few posts warning them that they won't because the board is run by man haters!)

Guest101

Person_one wrote: »

I agree with most of your post, but as to the last line, it only seems that way to some because we get an awful lot of women posting on here trying to deal with problems caused by men behaving badly.

The odd time there is a male poster in the same boat with a woman behaving badly towards them they get plenty of support too (and an inevitable few posts warning them that they won't because the board is run by man haters!)

But there isn't any 'behaving badly' in this thread.


A couple have split up, that's it.


No violence, etc.

MataNui

He has the right to enter when he pleases but its very unlikely he will. Lots of things are said in arguments and we have no idea of the context in which the OP is claiming he threatened to 'enter when he pleases'. In all likelihood it was in response to the OP telling him he had to move out and it was her house etc.

Wait and see what happens. you can put a chain on or leave the key in the door to feel secure when you are in the house. If you change the locks without a court order preventing him from entering then he is entitled to get a locksmith to let him in. Do yourself a favor and make sure anything of his is easily available (particularly any documents) so if he does turn up looking for something it will be a short visit.

justme111

Guest101 wrote: »

But there isn't any 'behaving badly' in this thread.


A couple have split up, that's it.


No violence, etc.

You somehow missed him saying he will come into her home as and when he pleases.

justme111

tea_lover wrote: »

Maybe he wants to be able to see his children without making an appointment.

Seeing children has nothing to do with being in ex's home. Can be and usually is done either at his or in a third place.
And yes non resident parent does it by agreeing time with resident parent or if not by court order , ie by appointment.

missbiggles1

justme111 wrote: »

You somehow missed him saying he will come into her home as and when he pleases.

Actually, he didn't.

The OP said " He keeps saying he can come and go as he pleases " which is why I said it could be a statement of fact as much as a threat. He didn't say he was actually going to - you just misread or assumed that.