Name Change After Marriage

Haize

I am so relieved to hear that it is not a legal requirement to tell all organisations your new name within x months - I married in September and have still forgotten to change so many things! Also, after showing my doctor's surgery my marriage certificate, and writing down how I now want my name, they have me listed as MISS S (they changed the name bit fine!), and more worryingly, my mobile bill now comes to me as MR S. I'm fairly certain I'm still female...

I've never had to worry about the whole problem of same name as MIL, as my husband's parents are not married! His gran was very happy that I chose to take his name, as he and she were the last for a lot of generations. Plus my name was very easy to make into something rude, which caused annoyance whilst at school (why are kids so nasty?!)

About still calling your husband your boyfriend - that is something I do, sometimes purposefully. We are both full time students, both young, and you get such strange looks from the other students when they find you are married! Nobody seems to get the idea that, no, it wasn't rushed. We were together long before we came to university!

Queenie

jellyhead wrote:

.....
............ they told me i was breaking the law by having a halifax account in one name and a barclays account in another name - is this true?

No, unless you are doing so to deceive I also have an account I keep in my maiden name and bank accounts in my married name.

margaretclare

Hi all

Re having 2 identities....this has been the case with many professional women for many, many years.

My late daughter had 2 identities, if that's the way to describe it. She always used her maiden name, was especially keen on keeping her 'dad's name' when her dad died just after she'd got engaged. But for family occasions when she and husband were invited together she was happy to be known as Mrs J. She said she couldn't be bothered with all the arguments with his parents and relatives, if it made them happy, so be it.

But when she died aged 39 all the documents, funeral etc were in her own name! So maybe she had the last laugh.

Aunty Margaret

Love_Weddings

http://www.loveweddings.co.uk/features/todolist_tkontheday.htm

We have a feature written by TK on the Day which is a comprehensive list of people who need to "know"

Jolaaled

i need to get proof that i'm the same person now, that i was prior to my marriage. (!!)

I no longer have my marriage cert...is there any other document that shows both married and maiden names..or does anyone know where i can get a copy of my marriage cert ( for free, of course!)
thanks

november

I had to get a copy of my marriage cert when I divorced. I think I got one from the registry office where we were married. It wasn't free but it didn't cost a fortune.

Second time round I had to send off for a copy of my divorce certificate to get remarried (from the court I got divorced in).

Fortunately I still have a copy of my statutory declaration for changing my name back to my maiden name. Like MargaretClare I was told I hadn't a choice in changing it first time round - and I asked!!

This time I'm keeping my own name. I prefer Ms like someone else on here although my bank account is in Miss. I find the whole Miss/Mrs thing just not suited to when you are/have been married but kept/changed back to your maiden name. Mrs maidenname sounds like I'm married to my Dad!! Miss maidenname sounds like I'm not/never been married Ms for me is the equivelant of Mr - one word fits all

Re. NI cards - I'm another 40 plus who never had one. Just copy my NI number into each year's diary.

I assume you don't have to tell anyone you've got married if you are not changing your name?

Jo_anne_2

I have been married for 20 years and kept my maiden name. I got married not long after my Dad died, so one of the reasons to hold onto to a link to him but also Mrs B was my MIL and I had no intention of taking her name (bless her)! There has never been any issue with bank accounts or mortgages or anything over the years, and the children have taken my husbands surname. Personally, I can't really understand why anyone would want to change their name on marriage as it seems such a faff.

Fairy_Michelle

Why do so many of you have a problem with having the same nane as your mum in law. If it was not for her none of you would have a husband/partner. Can I just say I love my MIL to bits. she is amazing.

zar

I have almost changed my name everywhere (just one savings account left) but it definitely was a faff. And although you might legally be allowed to use both names, in practice its really difficult. For example, I had changed my name at my bank and my utilitiy bills were in my married name but I hadn't changed my passport. When I tried to open a cash ISA I couldn't, as it had been over 3 months since the wedding and they said they didn't accept a passport and wedding certificate as proof of ID after that time. :mad:

Its just a personal choice which name you use I guess, people usually have definite ideas one way or the other. Personally I want to have the same name as my husband and especially my children when they arrive one day, and I marginally prefer my husband's surname to my maiden name anyway. But you can always both use the woman's name, like Cruella DeVil and her husband.

savingpennies

I too never changed my name when I got married 18 years ago and I've never had any problems. So many people in long standing relationships have never married and never changed their name that I don't think people give two hoots. My children have both our names and it's up to them which one they choose. I just felt that everything I had achieved was in my name and why should I then abandon it just because I had got married.