What's stressing you at the moment?

HurdyGurdy

A few little things

1. Husband still being unemployed and not getting many interviews (to be fair, it has "only" been three months, and I know that there are those who have had this stress for far longer)

2. Work. The department is going through some changes. Fairly minor, but they do impact on my role. But I am lucky in that I am (as far as anyone can be) in a secure job

3. Home. Specifically, having to take the surveyor we engaged eight months ago, to small claims court. Eight months and he still hasn't produced the plans we need to take to a builder to get the work done to our kitchen. Plenty of promises, and plenty of lies. So we had no choice. It's a relatively simple process (so far) but it's still quite stressful.

4. Me. And not being able to get into the right headspace for losing weight. I tell myself I am doing it, but in reality I am paying lip service and just not getting on with it.

All in all, relatively minor stresses, but stresses nevertheless.

meritaten

Every stage of your life carries 'Stress'. How you feel entirely depends on how you deal with it!
I am now retired - is my life stress free? No, I have family issues, inheritance issues, childminding issues etc etc..............BUT, I have learned over the years not to make minor issues MAJOR issues!
If you are the sort to sort to stress over issues - then learning to minimise them and sometimes ignore them is the best way. I let a lot of things 'go over my head' because I realise I cant dam well do anything about it - or I cant be arrsed. and deciding on your course of action for things you cant ignore lowers your stress levels.
life happens - its how you DEAL with it that affects you.

ripplyuk

I'm stressed as my MIL has cancer and has no one else to help her. She's having major surgery next week and now my grandad's just went back into hospital and they say he hasn't got long to live. I feel like a failure as I want to help both, but I'm struggling already.

My own mental health problems aren't helping either.

mgdavid

itsanne wrote: »

That doesn't apply to all circustances. There may be no point in worrying, but some things are worrying.

...................

Only if you let them!
Sometimes one has to give one's inner self a good talking to, and remind the subconcious of who's in charge, i.e. the concious 'me'.
It's my way of interpreting self-awareness. It comes easier for some than others I'm sure, but I'm equally certain that everyone can try it and practice it and gain from it.
Some of it's about attitude, too.
Try to avoid using these
and use lots of these instead

[Deleted User]

Past events a little for sure though I am through with feeling stressed, hopeless and sorry for myself and have moved straight to being angry.

A situation or 2?? at work that is totally out of order but I know it's not my problem when it goes wrong - I want out whilst I still can and I suppose I'll achieve it, I'm just concerned at how to conduct myself in this losing battle whilst being painfully more aware of how others must have felt in a previous life, even the boss apologising threw me.

Yeah I am of the thinking you get clear of one thing, there is always something else just waiting to slap you in the face.!!

My brother calling himself a !!!!!!! and with OCD going on about really personal stuff - I just left him to it after an hour last visit saying I worked with enough Dix I don't need to hear more rude talk which received round of applause from her and I cried less after this visit.

Still least there are no money worries yet, just a depreciation to contend with.

My new GP refuses to help due to hours worked so that is something as I'm imagining one day my body will just cease without the meds. Another fine mess I'll be in . I have got back into my murder in mind box set! Perhaps that should calm me down.

MidLifeMayhem

I haven't seen my 14 year old daughter for 9 months and my 17 year old son for 3. They just done want me in their lives. I grieve for them so much I want to be dead.

My 15 year old son who lives with me is sitting exams in a month and I'm stressed that he isn't going to do well.

My house is going on the market this week and it feels like the whole world will be judging me.

I can't find anywhere to move to and I'm stressed at the thought of overstretching myself.

My new job is so stressful I'm taking 10 kalms tablets a day just so I can breathe.

I'm 5 stone overweight. Single obviously, and starting to think that will be for ever.

I'm a contractor and know I'm time barred early next year from staying where I am so will need to move to a new employer. ( more being judged).

I have next to no pension and am worried if I live to an old age I'll be in abject poverty - think Nell in Endgame.

I worry I have so many problems I'm not a good enough friend.

System

Currently. losing the support i have and being left to survive on my part time wage alone, which isn't enough and facing the prospect of risking my mental well being to work more hours even though it nearly killed me last time.

Being in debt and feeling like i will never pay it off, which in turn means me and the bf wont be able to move in, which then leads to never being able to afford to get married or have kids.

Turning 30, i feel like my life should be in a better place than i am now, i didnt envisage being mentally ill, in debt, living in a house share and working part time.

miss_independent

My stresses are sort of my own makings. Reading the news and the posts on here even puts things in perspective and makes me feel selfish for worrying as much.

Nonetheless, I am stressed. It's so bad I wake up in the night worrying about things namely;

* I'm 32 and I've been single for over a year now. I was hurt very badly in my last relationship and I did need this time to heal and rebuild BUT...I'm now terrified I might miss out on being a mother. I've always wanted children and the older I get, the broodier I get. I wouldn't want to go down the route of donor insemination/voluntary single motherhood as I don't think, personally, that is fair on a child (I'd feel very selfish). I've always seen myself as the getting married and settling down type. I'm so scared I might have left it too late and that I might end up alone. The fact my parents are now in their late 60's/early 70's is also upsetting me as they are the only close family I have.

* I hate my current job. It's making me ill both physically and mentally as I've been suffering from depression and chronically low self esteem. I teach children and some adults with additional needs/behavioural problems and disabilities. I frequently get hit, kicked, spat on, hair pulled etc. I can't tell some of the things children have done recently to me as they are so disgusting I would be ashamed to tell you that I actually went back to work the next day despite what they did. I have to have weekly physio for back problems caused by having to restrain violent children. I'm the youngest of my colleagues and get stuck with all the donkey work. The pay is pretty rubbish too and its hard to afford to live alone. I would love to leave and have a complete career change (not care or teaching) but I don't know what else I could do or want to do. I feel like my only options to change careers completely would mean retraining. I already have an MA (in my specialism) but would potentially have to do another MA to get the necessary experience in a totally different field. That would set me back at least £5000. Not to mention that I could only work part time. I struggled to find the job I currently have and retraining knowing that there are few jobs out there at all terrifies me. Again, at 32, I'm feeling like I have failed at life.

* Feeling really alone and having no idea how people make new friends in their 30's. I'm involved in dance classes, music classes, my church etc but almost everyone who I come into contact with is decades older, ditto for work. Friends from uni, college etc are living far and wide and we only get to see each other a few times a year. I'm sick of going to the theatre/cinema etc on my own. I'm involved, when I can be, as a volunteer for a local charity. The other volunteers are women who are round about the same age as me but they are all married with young children. We get on and they occasionally invite me to the kids' birthday parties or charity quiz nights etc but, having no kids, I'm definitely the odd one out.


I spend lots of my free time reading self-development and self-improvement books. I genuinely want to change for the better. I just have no idea where to start. I do believe there is an art to happiness and it's an art I really want to learn.

Silvercat38

Yikes, reading others' stresses kinda puts mine into perspective, really. Mine is more of an irritation at the moment, although it has the potential to become downright stressful ......


My ex-husband refuses to remove me from our mortgage. I have not lived in the property for 15 years, am happily remarried, and the mortgage on the house I used to live in should have finished in 2008. However, I am receiving annual statements from the building society, addressed to me in my old married name, showing there is still a massive amount outstanding on the mortgage and there is still 7 years to go!


Clearly, my ex has forged my signature and got either an extension on the mortgage or more money, but telling the building society this has got me precisely nowhere. I have written to them numerous times, but they just ignore my letters and do not even bother to respond.


We don't have a mortgage on our current home, (inherited from my husband's mother), but we would like to buy a holiday property overseas, for which we would need to get a mortgage. However, I won't be able to get another one while the original one hangs round my neck like a flaming noose!


My ex is not approachable about this, (we don't speak), and I have no idea what to do next, other than pay for a solicitor to get involved - but I don't know who to trust without having to pay a fortune for this, and will it be effective in the end anyway?


Sheesh. NOW I feel stressed!

Ames

It's likely that it's the building society who won't have you taken off the mortgage. It gives them two people to chase instead of just one.

If there's been fraud that's another matter - perhaps you could ask for advice on the mortgage part of the forum?