Save the dates

pleasedelete

I also wouldn't go to an evening do if I didn't go to the service and reception. I certainly wouldn't plan my life a year in advance around an invitation to a few hours of party- so a save the date would be pretty pointless

JuneAB

melanzana wrote: »

My sister had her wedding at 5pm, the last registry office window on the day.

Then we went to a hotel for dinner, and she and new husband disappeared and left us all to it.

They did say goodnight though!

Best thing ever. No stress for her and husband, and we just ate and drank and drifted home eventually!

She died shortly after the wedding though, so I am still in bits. Sorry.

I am so sorry to hear this.

The wedding sounds like my ideal but would upset both sets of parents. Since they are paying for a large chunk of it we cannot do that.

I am so sorry for your loss x x

JuneAB

melanzana wrote: »

Evening invites should be BANNED!

You can tell I do not like them at all.....

Either I am invited to the full gig or I am going elsewhere, sorry babes.

Anyway, since I am on the thread, I would just text/watsapp the Full Day Guests with the date and looking forward to seeing you at our wedding kind of message. No cards, too expensive.

Forget about anything to do with the afterbirth crowd. Eight weeks is enough for them to decline.

Sorry.... I am being such a biatch.

But TBH I absolutely HATE weddings. I only go to family ones now, and one advantage of getting a bit older is the close family is nearly all wedded off by now, happy days!

I agree. Before I got engaged and even shortly after I was totally against evening invites and swore I would not invite evening only people.

BUT, as wedding plans started and we looked at our budget it became clear that we couldn't afford everyone so I had to reluctantly change my stance on these matters and my ego took a battering.

I am being selfish and want a sit down meal but I come from a large family (mum one of 6, dad one of 8 and 27 first cousins with me being the last to get married and have kids) it it just not possible to invite everyone (cost and space).

Last thing I want to do is get everyone to save the whole day only for them to realise they are only invited to evening. Just because they are invited to evening doesn't mean I want them there any less so hopefully by sending out 'save the evenings' we can get round this. (People may think, oh **** it it's only the evening we won't go - which is their choice)

Thanks everyone for your opinions.

xx

melanzana

JuneAB wrote: »

I am so sorry to hear this.

The wedding sounds like my ideal but would upset both sets of parents. Since they are paying for a large chunk of it we cannot do that.

I am so sorry for your loss x x

Thank you for that. Still have a lump in my throat a lot of the time, but onwards and upwards.

Why not do something like my late sister and hub did, if you discuss it with parents beforehand? It is your day after all.

All people want really is for the couple to be happy. Communication is the key here.

My late sister and husband said what they would like to do. Everyone loved it because it made them happy to do it like that.

I wish you the very best and congratulations on your impending wedding. I hope you have a wonderful day.

JuneAB

Thank you Melanzana - speaking from experience life does gets easier. One day you can speak about them with a smile on your face rather than a lump in your throat and that day will come without you realising.

Part of me want a small 'surprise' wedding, but the other part wants a big 'look at me' day. I dunno, it stresses me out thinking about the whole planning and stuff

xx

melanzana

JuneAB wrote: »

Thank you Melanzana - speaking from experience life does gets easier. One day you can speak about them with a smile on your face rather than a lump in your throat and that day will come without you realising.

xx

What a lovely thought to send me to bed with.

Your future husband sure has a Diamond there!

Best wishes for a lovely day for both of you. x

JuneAB

Good night and sweet dreams x

Spendless

JuneAB wrote: »

I agree. Before I got engaged and even shortly after I was totally against evening invites and swore I would not invite evening only people.

BUT, as wedding plans started and we looked at our budget it became clear that we couldn't afford everyone so I had to reluctantly change my stance on these matters and my ego took a battering.

I am being selfish and want a sit down meal but I come from a large family (mum one of 6, dad one of 8 and 27 first cousins with me being the last to get married and have kids) it it just not possible to invite everyone (cost and space).

Last thing I want to do is get everyone to save the whole day only for them to realise they are only invited to evening. Just because they are invited to evening doesn't mean I want them there any less so hopefully by sending out 'save the evenings' we can get round this. (People may think, oh **** it it's only the evening we won't go - which is their choice)

Thanks everyone for your opinions.

xx

Not everyone will think the same way about evening invites only. I think it very much depends on your relationship and geography etc.

I was thrilled to get an evening invite from my workmate who only started working at the same place as me 10 weeks before her wedding. I certainly wouldn't have expected to be invited all day.

My husband's cousin is marrying next year. I will be excited if we are invited all day, but I am aware that my husband's side of the family is a large one and there may be financial constraints and phyiscal space that prevent us from getting a whole day invite. We are in touch but only see them from time to time due to living 100 miles apart. In this case, I'd be disappointed but understanding and would still attend the evening.

My husband's sister is also marrying next year. In this case I would expect a whole day invite as they are close, in touch a lot and we see/speak to them frequently

selement

Personally I think save the dates are silly unless it is a date people are very likely to be busy. I definitely wouldn't do them for evening guests. If it's that important the person comes to your wedding won't they probably know when it is anyway?

Lamb86

I got married last year and we didn't send Save The Dates (mainly because we planned the whole thing in 8 months and seemed a bit pointless).
I personally wouldn't send them for evening guests. You never know your guestlist may change anyway (ours certainly did, we had some people who weren't able to attend the day time so we invited some people who had been on the evening list to the whole day), we also let alot of people know the date before our invitations went out anyway. I think alot of wedding planning is personal preference - ultimately do what you think is right!