Mild rant!

susancs

I agree with the above posts in that I am sure they are able to do all the things you state, but it is amy be more a case of whether they will want to do them and if they can get away with not doing them, they may do so.

Person_one

elsien wrote: »

Good luck with that one, given that an awful lots of adults use their phones in a similar way.

This.

If anybody knows a polite way to tell a grown adult to put their bl**dy phone down at the dinner table, could they please share?

Kaye1

Person_one wrote: »

This.

If anybody knows a polite way to tell a grown adult to put their bl**dy phone down at the dinner table, could they please share?

I tried, 'oh sorry, are we too boring for you? Not interesting enough?'

Not polite but it worked!

onomatopoeia99

Person_one wrote: »

If anybody knows a polite way to tell a grown adult to put their bl**dy phone down at the dinner table, could they please share?

The polite thing to do is to respect their choice. If you don't like it, don't dine with them again.

Person_one

onomatopoeia99 wrote: »

The polite thing to do is to respect their choice. If you don't like it, don't dine with them again.

If only that were an option!

You don't think its rude to ignore your dining companions and be on your phone constantly then? I might start getting a book out, or wearing headphones!

balletshoes

Person_one wrote: »

If only that were an option!

You don't think its rude to ignore your dining companions and be on your phone constantly then? I might start getting a book out, or wearing headphones!

I agree, I think its rude for adults to be on their phones rather than engaging with the people they are with in a restaurant. Its becoming more and more prevalent though.

Out,_Vile_Jelly

onomatopoeia99 wrote: »

The polite thing to do is to respect their choice. If you don't like it, don't dine with them again.

It's technically my "choice" to pick my nose at the table, burp loudly and play a xylophone between courses. I choose not to do these things though, as manners dictate that when you're in certain social situations such as group dining, you pay attention to your eating companions.

I've got my library book out and started reading it when people check their phones.

Jagraf

Out,_Vile_Jelly wrote: »

It's technically my "choice" to pick my nose at the table, burp loudly and play a xylophone between courses. I choose not to do these things though, as manners dictate that when you're in certain social situations such as group dining, you pay attention to your eating companions.

I've got my library book out and started reading it when people check their phones.

No wonder you have a small appetite:D

TBagpuss

duggo1 wrote: »

Can I just say I'm not a parent, so maybe have unrealistic expectations, but what should a 13 year old be capable of?

Trimming his own fingernails?
Mixing his own food together on his plate?!
Sitting at a restaurant with an adult group without gadgets and join in the conversation?
Making a bed?

Capable, yes.

Whether they do it - depends on whether they have been brought up to do it and how much they care.

For instance.
-fingernails - yes, they should be able to. But I would expect their paretns to still need to remind them sometimes, and it might take the form of seding them off to *clean* their nails if they sit down to a meal with dirty hands/nails. If they want long fingernails then so be it.

mixing food toghether - I'm not sure what you mean by this? I'm struggling to think of a situation where it would be polite or appropriate to mix food at the table?
I wouldn't see that as a life skill. I think a 13 year old should be able to serve themelf where appropriate, to eat neatly and to refrain from making rude comments about their food. It they like it mixed up then they ought to be capable of mixing it but should also be aware of how to eat in police company.
Sitting at a restaurant with an adult group without gadgets and join in the conversation? - If they are included in the conversation, yes. I would expect them to put a gadget away when the food comes, or when addressed, but I would not expect them to know that that was appropriate unless they have been taught about polite restaurant behaviour by their parents.
If the conersation is not inclusive then I think sitting quietly and minding their own business, with or without a gadget or book, is not unreasonable.

making their own bed? - I think it is unreasonable for a 13 year old to expect someone else to make their bed for them. However, in most contexts, unless they are expecting me to make the bed for them it is not any of my business whethe rthey are making it or not. I think most people these days use duvets so there isn't much making required.

enthusiasticsaver

balletshoes wrote: »

I agree, I think its rude for adults to be on their phones rather than engaging with the people they are with in a restaurant. Its becoming more and more prevalent though.

I agree. It is rude but somehow seems to be acceptable given the number of adults who do it now. A very good friend of mine will persist in texting supposed urgent texts to her daughters/husband on the once or twice monthly time we get together for one or two hours. Annoys me intensely.