large booking at restaurant- how to split the bill?

onlyroz

enthusiasticsaver wrote: »

We went out for lunch with two other couples on Saturday and just split bill and tip three ways. We all shared starters though and had main meal, dessert, coffees and three bottles of wine between us. Simples but then we are probably all in similar financial positions and lucky enough not to worry too much. When we invite our DDs and SIL out we pay as we are not watching every penny and they are. They will be the same with their kids one day.

That's all fine if you all eat broadly similar amounts and have broadly the same incomes, or if there are family members that you're happy to subsidise because you know that they earn less than you. However, what if one couple invited along a young guest (say an impoverished student friend of their son from uni), who ate a cheap burger and had a glass of coke. Would you expect them to chip in as much as the rest of you? Or perhaps you'd risk offending his pride him by offering to pay for him?

Jagraf

onlyroz wrote: »

That's all fine if you all eat broadly similar amounts and have broadly the same incomes, or if there are family members that you're happy to subsidise because you know that they earn less than you. However, what if one couple invited along a young guest (say an impoverished student friend of their son from uni), who ate a cheap burger and had a glass of coke. Would you expect them to chip in as much as the rest of you? Or perhaps you'd risk offending his pride him by offering to pay for him?

I would definitely offer to pay for him, by still splitting the Bill three ways (sorry question wasn't aimed at me but had to chirp in). I do that loads, if students still want to pay they can insist - which they rarely do )

Georgiegirl256

Jagraf wrote: »

From a personal perspective if I was going to an occasion, I would make a calculated guess at what the cost would be, divvied up by number of guests. I have in the past turned down occasions because I simply couldn't afford to go based on this calculation (even if I cound afford my particular meal).
.

That's sad. So you could have gone, enjoyed your meal, paid your way for what you ate and drank but chose not to because that wasn't deemed socially acceptable amongst your group?

It's a shame you had to miss out. That's why, if everyone just paid their own way, scenerios like this would not happen.

onlyroz

Jagraf wrote: »

in the past, for many years we went camping for a week with some friends of ours (bones too stiff now to lie on the floor). There were three families - all with different numbers of kids, some adults drank, some didn't eat meat, etc. We split the shopping bill three ways at the supermarket before we left - including washing up liquid, loo roles, gas etc. it never occurred to me who had more food / drank more beer/ ate more. How would you manage this scenario?

You agree in advance something you're all happy with. On an extended holiday though I'd expect people to have their own preferences over what they drink. So I'd be bringing along my own beer, and fizzy pop for the kids, but I'd happily chip in my share of the general grocery bill.

missbiggles1

Pollycat wrote: »

There's sharing and then there's standing up, leaning over the table - usually complete with drinks - and taking something off someone else's plate:

Accetable to you?

I do get the shared pudding thing but as I never order one, I don't share.

I certainly wouldn't take anything off someone's plate unless invited but I think it's quite common (among friends) to offer someone a taste on your fork.

pigpen

PasturesNew wrote: »

Sounds good to me. All perfectly normal and reasonable.

See... I knew sooner or later we would find something our crazy selves would agree on..

I don't carry cash being royal and all.

This is how we do things when I go out with my mother and sisters.. though my mother usually pays for my sister who has more money than either my mother or myself..

Person_one

onlyroz wrote: »

You agree in advance something you're all happy with. On an extended holiday though I'd expect people to have their own preferences over what they drink. So I'd be bringing along my own beer, and fizzy pop for the kids, but I'd happily chip in my share of the general grocery bill.

That's what I've done when camping/self catering with friends. Share on the basics (loo roll,milk,bread), extras (alcohol,crisps) are up to you to get your own or figure out a share with someone who likes the same stuff. Works pretty well.

onlyroz

Jagraf wrote: »

I would definitely offer to pay for him, by still splitting the Bill three ways (sorry question wasn't aimed at me but had to chirp in). I do that loads, if students still want to pay they can insist - which they rarely do )

And what if you offered to pay, and the young chap then took advantage and scoffed the steak and champagne with lobster on the side?

missbiggles1

onlyroz wrote: »

One pudding and two spoons is totally different from offering somebody a morsel off your own fork.

It's different but both are perfectly normal.

pigpen

missbiggles1 wrote: »

I certainly wouldn't take anything off someone's plate unless invited but I think it's quite common (among friends) to offer someone a taste on your fork.

but you are going to eat from it.. what if they have a coldsore? Or a fungal mouth infection? Or just gave their partner a bj before they came out? And how many infections and viruses are spread through saliva? colds, flu, chickenpox, glandular fever, HIV..

It's really not common, it is revolting!


If you put aside a sample of your meal and they got it with their own fork it would be less gross..