Re-paying gifted monies after break up

AdrianC

Mathshead wrote: »

If we do that then I will come out with a loss.

Oh, dear. What a pity.

The thing is that the decision to separate was not mine, so I don't feel inclined to take a financial loss to basically help the ex out of a spot of bother with her family, so my view is that there is no legal obligation for the solicitor to repay out of the value of the house, and I know that any money I repay will be recycled to the ex's benefit, why should I even consider this as this is not a situation I instigated.

You sound like such a nice chap. I can't think why she's left you...

Look, it's very simple. Her parents provided you both with the means to own a home, as a couple. You are no longer a couple. Repay them.

G_M

AdrianC wrote: »

You sound like such a nice chap. I can't think why she's left you...

Look, it's very simple. Her parents provided you both with the means to own a home, as a couple. You are no longer a couple. Repay them.

Indeed. He does sound like a nice chap. I too cannot think why she left him...

Yes - it is very simpe. Her parents provided them both with a gift as a couple.They are no longer a couple, so should divide their possessions (whether the DVD collection or equity in property) as seems most fair. The parents don't come into it.

Mathshead

Good advice, she played away and I get the bill!!

Wassa123

So there was no agreement to who owns what shares, what happens of you sell, or anything?

How much was yours, hers, and her family's contribution?

You could play it several ways...

1) As the breakup was her fault you could reasonably demand you end up in the same financial position you were before the purchase. Granted house prices have gone up so you'll be worse off anyway.

2) Let the property instead of sell it and split any income

3) Refuse to sell and she'd have to spend lots of money on legal and court feels to get the sale order, even that would split her familys 'gift' if there was no declaration of trust on the property, so it may convince her to go with #1.

AdrianC

Mathshead wrote: »

Good advice, she played away and I get the bill!!

Ah, my mistake. I misunderstood that what you really wanted was justification for revenge.

Andypandyboy

A gift is a gift.

Are you crossing a bridge too early or has this subject come up as a request for you to repay?

Personally, in the circumstances you outline I wouldn't repay and I say that as a parent who did the same as your ex's did. I wouldn't expect it back.

I would expect each of you to get to get their share of the deposit back before any other split of monies was done though.

Jon_B_2

csgohan4 wrote: »

This idea still hinges on the other ex agreeing, if not it'll go to the courts.

Why would it go to the courts - as far as we know it was declared as a gift. There's no written or verbal agreement at the outset to pay it back.

If any part of the deposit was gifted, then it will also be signed in writing that there is no monies to be paid back.

This to me is purely a moral issue. My take on it is that the ex was the cause of the break up, therefore I'm 50/50 whether I'd give any back.

But that's just because I'm spiteful.

FBaby

In addition, it is being suggested that we should prioritise repayment of monies gifted by my now ex's parent

Suggested by whom? Your ex? Have you spoken to them? I think it is really in your favour that you are considering a deal with them, especially when you don't have to. I would contact them and come up with some sort an agreement, that is if they are looking at some money back. The fairest compromise would be for you to pay a portion of your half (they have to accept that they took a risk giving that money) and agree for you to pay in installment if you can't pay it all in one go.

ethank

You could not of bought the house without the parents help. Was this really a 'gift' or was it as 'gift' in the eyes of the lender only, with the family helping you both out and expecting it back. If the latter, pay up and move on.

Spirit_2

When received it, did you consider the gift was to their daughter or to you as a couple. Did you acknowledge it was gift to you as a couple ( you both thanked them etc).