Lemons to Lemonade!!

Hopefuljoy

Good afternoon! I have achieved something today!

First on the MSE side I did the weekly shop and it came to £21.23 for the week. I walked around with a calculator and put things back if they weren't strictly necessary. I've got all the ingredients needed for the batch cooking this week. It helped that DD and I had a to do before and she refused to come in with me so it was a lot cheaper.

The argument was all about her brother who did a one year plumbing course a few years ago. Unfortunately he practised on our then bathroom and it was a terrible experience all round. I had to borrow a thousand pounds to rectify everything that went wrong. He was also very abusive to her also as he was going through a prolonged period of copying his father's abuse. So in the end he had to leave at 18. He and DD have a very damaged relationship and she understandably doesn't want him to come round. However, I was panicking about the bathroom and texted him to ask about what could be causing it. He can be very overbearing but offered to come round and help and I said yes. Cue huge backlash from DD.

However, it did spur me on to take the bath panel off and have a look myself when we got home. And I have found the leak!!!!!!! All I need him to do is show me how to fix it and I can do it myself. DD is going out with the dog for a walk while he comes round so any conflict will be avoided. It can be quite tricky balancing their relationship and sometimes I do get it wrong. I feel dreadful about it and need to learn but parents don't always get it right.

I'm going to put the £3.77 in my sealed pot. I am really fortunate that my parents have given me £250 for a four day break in Rome this summer for my 50th birthday. My sisters are giving me euros to spend and I'd like to build up an extra fund for going out with friends and family for celebrations. There are five months to go and I will aim for £100.

I'm off to church now and will catch up on everyone's threads later. I hope you are all doing well today!:T

Sun_Addict

Hello Hopefuljoy - you posted on my diary and I must confess I've been lurking on yours and subscribed but not posted. Sounds like you've had an eventful few years too! Sorry to hear about your mum - it's lovely that you've got a close family and you can all support each other. I lost my mum 16 years ago to a brain tumour, I still miss her and think about her every day, it's an awful thing to go through a terminal diagnosis of someone you love. Big hugs xx

Well done on being able to focus on the financial side of things on top of all this. However, I know it helps to have a distraction. I lurked on this site for quite a while before I started a diary a few years ago and I found it really scary at first putting my thoughts out to whoever knows how many people. I'm glad I did it though as I have had so much support from others, there are people on here who were very much part of helping me cope with what happened to Mr SA, a couple of whom unfortunately are sadly no longer with us (Taxi and Kissjen )

Good luck and keep posting.

Hopefuljoy

Thank you Sun Addict. Your comments are so kind and welcome! It's been an eventful few years to say the least, however, things will get on an even keel eventually. I am so sorry about your Mother. I don't think anything can prepare us children for the death of our parents. I've gone through the whole of my life thinking my mother and father are eternal but now Dad is almost 83 and keeps having dizzy spells and Mum is going through pulmonary fibrosis which there is no treatment and no cure for. At least me and my sisters all live within a two mile radius so we can all keep each other going.

Well, DS has been and gone and has identified the issue which was a hole in the trap underneath. I'm going to the local plumb place tomorrow after I've done a five hour revision session at school for my A level students. Then he's going to come and fit it in the evening.

I've updated YNAB and it is frankly gruesome! £414 overbudgeted and it's going to get worse before the month is over. However, in real life I have enough for essentials and the £248 CSA money comes in on 15th. I really have gone totally off the rails in March and just need to batten down the hatches.

Managed to take the fence etc to the dump and have put £5 into my sealed pot as I was feeling a burst of enthusiasm. I will have to remove it tomorrow for the plumbing bits and start again though! Ho hum!!!!!

I'm off to bed early tonight so I am bright eyed and bushy tailed for the students. I hope they turn up!!!

Am off to read other diaries now and will see you tomorrow!!

Hopefuljoy

Hello everyone!!! Just settling down to posting after a bit of a spendy day.:eek:

First to Sainsbobs with DD to buy croissants and muffins for my AS level class as we had a four hour revision session. Even though its the Eastet hols they all turned up and I was so chuffed! They were great and worked really hard so we all left half an hour early. Hurrah!:T That was £5.75 spent and well worth it as they were very motivated by the food.:j

Then straight back to the plumbers to buy a new sink waste for the bath and some sealant to go round it. I was very MSE as I bought the old fashioned plain waste with chain and plug for £6.49. The alternative press down one was £21.99 so plenty of money saved there! Also the sealant was only £4.49 so I was quite relieved. DS is fitting it all for free tonight so more MSE.

Collected prescription as well and was tempted (it really doesn't take much!) by a bottle of reduced Rose wine for me and some crisps for DD. So that was £6.50:(Not quite so MSE...........

Finally I have encouraging news on the loan front. It currently stands at £3267.52 and there is another £125 going out on 7th. So all told my debts are £975 for CC and after Friday £3142.52 on car loan. Total £4,118 rounding it up to the nearnest pound.

That's slightly overwhelming but at least now I know the damage.:eek::eek:

So the plan is to pay off an extra 1% each week so that it can snowball (I think that's what its called). That means finding £117 pcm extra which technically I should be able to do.

Because I've gone so over my budget this month I might have to be more modest in May but now the number is right there in front of me I do feel spurred into action. You are all right, having a thread is really motivating!!:j:j

Right, I'm off to read more threads now and in particular to finish SAs one. I want to start contributing on your threads as well as it's a two way street!

Also I'd like to carry on Greying Pilgrim's tradition (blimey I miss her!!) and try to list three things per day I am grateful for so here goes

My DS having the skills to help me out and our improved relationship
Having a lovely DD
All the animals in our house (and the mouse I rescued yesterday!)
Thank you for reading!

StrugglingYouth

The key to it I think is make constant small steps. They will add up over time to produce big changes.

You can do this, you prove that everyday!

apple_muncher

Well done and respect to you hopefuljoy, posting your soa. You are one brave cookie!

please-let-me-be-lucky

HJ, you are the hero. I had no idea you'd faced such awful things in your past Much love Xx

beanielou

Baby steps~~keep plodding

brizzledfw

Great posts HJ..so pleased to see how you're trying challenging things and succeeding..go you!

I miss Greying too...hope she's OK.

X

Hopefuljoy

Hello Struggling Youth, Beanie, Lucky, Brizzle and Apple!! What lovely posts you left me to wake up to this morning!

Struggling you are right, small steps. With that in mind and after a chat with one of my sisters today I am going to reduce my loan overpayments to 1% every fortnight until I know I am managing my other finances better as well. It'll still make a great difference. Also my Sis said wisely that if I tighten the purse strings too much it might make me so fed up I have even more L'Ore!l moments...... and we don't want that !

Lucky, thank you for being so kind. I did have a diastrous 15 year marriage but left in 2007 (with a police escort; me and the children had twenty minutes to pack and a lovely young policeman came round the house to help). Nothing that hits me in life can compare to the awfulness of those years and when I feel a bit fed up I find it quite easy to put things into perspective. I am very happy being a singleton but I'm not bitter about men at all. One day perhaps.............;):rotfl: It's you and SA I admire for keeping going as you do. You are incredible!

Brizzle - I was born in Bristol and lived in Keynsham (spelling???) for the first 6 months before moving to Sussex. My dad only moved because he was going to work in London. Bristol is lovely!:)

Apple - I don't feel brave! I feel like my knicker elastic has broken without me realising and everyone else has noticed them slide down me legs!!! It's really weird telling the unvarnished truth about my finances. My family is kept well in the dark!! I wouldn't want to have that conversation with them at all.:eek::eek:

Lovely Beanie - you seem to be everywhere I look on the threads and I know you have your struggles as well. I feel honoured to have you here on my journey!:A

MSE wise today what have I got up to? Well, I dug a battered cod out of the freezer and cooked it with homemade mediterranean roast veg with an olive pesto and olive oil sauce. Yum!!!! Lunch was with friends whom I visit every holiday. They are lovely, loyal and fun so we had a great time together. Lunch is always at one of our homes so no expense there and the petrol was part of my weekly allocation.

I've also moved £43 from Barcs to YorkBank to top it up for the car loan payment this week. That leaves me £58 until CSA comes through on 15th. I feel confident this will be fine as I'm allocating £25 petrol, £20 food, £5 DD and remaining £8 treats for both of us.

DS fixed the bath last night so I DON'T SMELL!!!!:T:T I am fit for human consumption and happy it was all done on a tight budget without me panicking.

I've sorted my summer clothes this evening and have a really nice selection - that don't fit me:(:(. So the plan is weight watchurrs starting next week. It's worked before and I need the discipline. I shall be paying each week as I can't commit to payment in advance. It also makes me more inclined to do it and I'll look forward to going.

This coming month I am also going to think about my social life, which won't take long as it's church once a week for an hour and the occasional coffee with family on a Saturday. I know I'm an introvert but this is ridiculous!!!!!!!!! The thing is I love my job and the pupils even though they are tough little cookies and thankfully work in a lovely dept. So my working days are jam packed with interactions with nice people. When I get home I'm knackered and want to retreat with DD. But she will be off to university or something in two years and I need to build more of a life for myself as I will miss her terribly.

Now I'm going to share my ultimate dream with you........... a caravan or motorhome!!!! My whole family laughs at me about this one but I am obsessed. They are like catnip to me!!! However, there is no chance of this until I get all my debts included mortgage sorted and I'm prepared for the long haul. I want to take off and travel around Europe before I can't manage it. :rotfl::rotfl:

I'd better go now as I need to pick DD up from her job. I hope you've all had a really good day today.

Today I am thankful for

My sensible sister who helps keep me balanced
My lovely friends in RL
You all in MSE world!!