Negative driving instructor

dktreesea

AdrianC wrote: »

True, it doesn't.

But is "greedy instructor" the only reason you can think of for 50 lessons?

Well, think about it. Most people who learn to drive have a couple of lessons, then go out and practice with one of their family members in between the lessons from then on. Our children's driving instructor guaranteed to have them ready for the test in 16 weeks, one hour a week, provided they were able to practice in between.


If you don't have anyone willing to take you out and practice, then, yes, maybe even 100 lessons wouldn't be enough for some people.

jozxyqk

spottycat wrote: »

So I just finished a lesson, it was going well at first then I made another minor mistake and he goes off on one...then he points out everything wrong afterwards.
I asked him if I could pull up on the left and he said ok, I told him I was making mistakes as his tone of voice and frustration was making me nervous and I needed to stop for a moment and collect myself together before moving on.
He seemed really surprised and denied that he was getting frustrated he said he was being 'mean' to encourage me. That all driving instructors will adopt this attitude when a pupil is close to their test.
I said ok that's fine but do you think it's helping me? Do I seem confident? Do I appear encouraged when you bang your pencil in the dashboard or window?
He said this was the reality and I need to get used to it, he then went on to say the examiner won't encourage you or tell you, you have done well to which I replied they also shouldn't shout or make gestures or bang their pencil in frustration.
He then asked if I wanted to finish and go home, I said no I have payed £55 for this lesson so we're gonna finish it.
From then on he was quiet, gave me instructions and didn't say much only once pointing out when I indicated late.
When we pulled up outside my house he said I had to get used to a tough attitude because if I think I'll get another instructor they will treat me the same. I said he wasn't being tough and he wasn't being mean, he was behaving in a way which made me believe I was wrong, nothing is right, he is frustrated I am nervous.
I said if anything needs working on its that! Ok you want to have a mean attitude but at the same you are not encouraging, you point out mistakes but we don't fix them, you make me nervous then I have to get over it because that's the reality?
He then went on to say I'll only pass my test with luck and I need a lot of it, then he started making jokes and bad puns to see if I would laugh, when he saw I wasn't he said 'don't worry it'll be ok' ????
Too late to rebook my test now but at least he won't be in the car while that's happening.
Thanks for advice, if I hadn't made this post I wouldn't have told him anything and although it was awkward I feel better for telling him how I feel, even though I'll dwell on it tonight and never sleep!

My instructor was a lot like this, I think he was basically a perfectionist and got really wound up by my apparent lack of ability. A typical lesson would go fine until I made a mistake, then he'd hammer me for it to the extent that I'd make further mistakes.


I passed first time, so he obviously did something right. I think I was extra motivated to not have to be taught by him anymore - maybe that was his plan all along.

ChicaBonita

I had a fair few lessons (and tests) before I eventually passed.

My first instructor was a bit of a letch, and his car was constantly breaking down, so I'd have a couple of weeks inbetween lessons. He only took me round the same country lanes for the whole 10ish lessons I had with him. Then I had a break from learning as I had two jobs and worked 7 days a week.

My next instructor, a woman, was similar to the one described in the OP's thread. If anything happened she would grab at the wheel, yell at me, call me stupid, and lay into me as soon as we pulled over. Sometimes I got so upset I'd have tears in my eyes, and I couldn't see properly due to them!!! When we got to my first test, I was so nervous I sat in the car with the examiner, and thought, "Sh**, how do I even drive?"

Needless to say after I failed that test, I found another examiner, who was lovely. She was methodical, explained to me exactly what I was doing wrong, why this was wrong, and what I needed to do instead. She would tell me when I had done something right as well, which I think is a massive thing for confidence.
I eventually passed the day before my theory test ran out (I'd managed to get a cancellation and I knew it was now or never!)

As others have said here OP, just go with the new instructor. It's all about learning styles, teaching styles, and personalities. Sometimes it's just not meant to be.

stator

I haven't read this whole thread but OP I had exactly the same situation when I lived in Cheltenham.

I was booked to take a driving test and my new instructor was being really negative, telling me how crap I was etc. When he said "that was s**t" I actually stopped the car, got out and walked away, never to see the scumbag again.
Found a new instructor, 10 lessons with the BSM and I passed

In retrospect I realise what the first instructor was doing. He wanted me to leave but I don't know why he didn't just say so. When I first met him he was always going on about his pass rate and so when he thought I wasn't going to pass he was upset and trying to get me to cancel the test as he didn't want me bringing down his statistics.

bod1467

stator wrote: »

When I first met him he was always going on about his pass rate and so when he thought I wasn't going to pass he was upset and trying to get me to cancel the test as he didn't want me bringing down his statistics.

Apparently if an instructor has too good a pass rate they can actually get marked down for it. (Told to me by a driving instructor neighbour who also has a very good pass rate).

maddogb

stator wrote: »

I haven't read this whole thread but OP I had exactly the same situation when I lived in Cheltenham.

I was booked to take a driving test and my new instructor was being really negative, telling me how crap I was etc. When he said "that was s**t" I actually stopped the car, got out and walked away, never to see the scumbag again.
Found a new instructor, 10 lessons with the BSM and I passed

In retrospect I realise what the first instructor was doing. He wanted me to leave but I don't know why he didn't just say so. When I first met him he was always going on about his pass rate and so when he thought I wasn't going to pass he was upset and trying to get me to cancel the test as he didn't want me bringing down his statistics.

surely not when he can just turn down your business if independent, if not why the hell didn't you put in a complaint about him. I wouldn't let any employee get away with that.

stator

maddogb wrote: »

surely not when he can just turn down your business if independent, if not why the hell didn't you put in a complaint about him. I wouldn't let any employee get away with that.

He was self employed!
He was my third instructor because the first was 200 miles away and the second had just gone on holiday for a month, so my third was him and my forth was the BSM

Either way, my fourth was excellent, only downside is that I had to pay for 10 lessons as that was their minimum.

stator

bod1467 wrote: »

Apparently if an instructor has too good a pass rate they can actually get marked down for it. (Told to me by a driving instructor neighbour who also has a very good pass rate).

Not sure I understand that?
How can an instructor be marked down anyway?

lister

spottycat wrote: »

Sorry I wrote this whilst on the cross ramp!

Basically we were approaching the roundabout I had checked all was clear, a car was approaching from the right but it wasn't quite there yet (at the give way line). So I pulled away and just after the give way line the instructor did am emergency stop.
He asked if I had the the car on the right I said yes, he said he never saw me look, so I said I would not have gone if I wasn't sure (we talk about me hesitating a lot) so he apologised.
We drove on, stopped on the left and he gives me a 10 min talk about roundabouts and checking...so I made sure I did some exaggerated head movements next time I checked!

Strictly speaking if it was a normal rather than mini roundabout, you only have to give way to the right to traffic circulating on the roundabout, not to traffic approaching. That said, some small normal roundabouts should be treated more like minis as you can put yourself in danger entering with traffic approaching at speed from the right.

However, late braking on entry to roundabouts is a recipe for a rear-ender and to be avoided at all costs by ADIs. Unless I thought the car from the right was actually likely to hit us, I would let you go on, then get you to assess if you felt the driver had to slow at all for us. If I did have to stop you, then about a second or two later, the car would have been whizzing past your nose.

In the interest of balance, I have often had to stop students (more commonly at junctions than roundabouts), and they have said 'I thought I could make it'. Only if 'make it' means not actually dying in a blazing fireball!

Frankly as an active ADI, it sounds like your current instructor is a giant termination of a item of church accoutrement for the production of clanging noises (you'll smile when you work it out), but that is obviously only based on your point of view (again trying to be as even handed as possible).

There is an art to praise as a teacher. Too much and it is devalued and artificial, too little and it isn't enough encouragement. The best demonstration of well targeted praise was a recent test I sat in on. The examiner said little in the debrief, but referring to one nice bit of fiddling through a small gap he just said 'nice' (which was more or less what I thought when she did it).

bod1467

stator wrote: »

Not sure I understand that?
How can an instructor be marked down anyway?

I can't quite remember - it was a while ago he told me. Something to do with Driver and Vehicle Standards Agency registration or similar?