Nice People Thread No. 15, a Cyber Summer

ivyleaf

It's pigeons we have problems with....they used to roost in trees on the perimeter of a derelict building across the road, then the trees were felled because homes are being built on the site. So the pigeons have decided that under the eaves of the houses on our side of the road will have to do instead

At least they don't dive-bomb people though.

zagubov

We discussed this years ago.

A strange thing about growing up in Glasgow was I always believed we must be right by the sea, as there were so many seagulls everywhere.
Somebody had a business which made a good living driving them away.
http://www.hiddenglasgow.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=9744

I think he just followed them from town to town and got hired to keep moving them further on!

vivatifosi

Speaking of sea birds being in danger, I read this and it broke my heart (don't read if you're sentimental):

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2016/jul/06/huge-penguin-colony-at-risk-from-erupting-volcano

SingleSue

I do a fair bit of the sky is falling thinking and it has (and still does) prevent me from doing various things. For example, I still haven't been able to drive to James' uni and when I had to drive to Josh's uni last week from a different part of the country, I stressed about it for about a month, got in a right state in the days before leaving and at one point on the drive was shaking so much I had to stop.

I have also missed out on two school reunions, various days out (and nice people meet ups) and have messed up days out because I have only seen danger instead of nice experiences.

I do try to challenge my fears though, sometimes it works and I can go through with it and feel proud of myself afterwards (still doesn't make it easier the next time though!), sometimes it doesn't and I still can't do it. Everything has to be planned though, every eventuality plotted out and alternatives put in place, landmarks familiarised etc. The scary trip last week? I did the entire thing on google maps streetview a few times....we are talking a two and a half hour drive, painstakingly gone through, click after click of the forward mouse as it was a road I had never been on before.

Pyxis

Sue, I do stuff like that too. Not necessarily the whole journey, but I look up junctions that might be tricky, work out which lane I should be in, etc, and then things like looking for public car parks, where the entrance to a carpark is, etc., how far it is from the venue I'm aiming for. I do this particularly if there is a deadline for arriving, and/or if I'm going to be taking someone else.

It's not that I don't like driving, I do, but it takes any stress out of trying to find your way around a strange town, especially with an 'audience' in the car!

I like the way I can look for landmarks to notice, as well as street names, etc.

I also do this if I am going to be a passenger in someone else's car, as they might not have, choosing to rely on satnav, but also because another pair of eyes and an extra bit of knowledge can be helpful.

I do like navigating, I must admit!

I don't have satnav. When I bought my car, it wasn't a standard feature but an optional extra, and I chose not to have it, as I like maps, and I like working out a route for myself. This was before I had Google Earth, too.
So now the combination of a physical map, Google Earth and my own notes makes for a much easier journey into the unknown!

Doozergirl

The main thing for me is to separate myself from worries and limiting thoughts, which is why I call it a voice. If it's genuinely me thinking those thoughts, then who is listening?

If I would not choose those thoughts or choose to limit my behaviours, it cannot be me. I can choose to ignore them and I can choose to bring myself into the present and feel good instead.

I think with anxiety particularly, the body reacts with 'fight or flight' before you even know why. And then you look for the danger even when it doesn't exist. I rarely have palpitations now, but when I do, I recognise it as a false physical response and remind myself that there is nothing to be afraid of. I don't have to continue feeling bad.

Mindfulness is good because it allows you to know what actually exists in a moment is simple, physical stuff, not the rubbish we produce in our minds and fool ourselves into calling reality. When you're worrying about driving and you aren't driving, you're creating a false reality. Change the script. If you wouldn't choose to worry and feel bad, relax, be mindful, come
back to the present and choose to enjoy a good result in advance instead.

My favourite question for worrying is 'What's the worst that can happen?' which, when thought through logically is never as bad as you think. And even if the worst does happen, at least you didn't waste perfectly good time worrying amd feeling bad beforehand.

And my favourite phrase is '!!!! it'.

Jazee

Doozergirl, summed up brilliantly. This is my way of tackling anxiety too - what is the worst that can happen?

For driving in strange places etc (which I don't like) I talk myself into thinking of it as an adventure, and congratulate myself on the achievement when I've done it.

You only live once.

chris_m

chris_m wrote: »

It seemed to be about the right consistency when I dropped a bit on a chilled plate so I've bottled it and will see how it is in the morning - when a) the jam's cooled and b) the bread's thawed out

Well, the raspberry jam experiment worked a treat, just had some on toast and it was yummy.

I'm rather glad about that because, before making the toast, I felt I ought to go out and pick the next lot since there's been a break in the weather - I've got another 3 pounds of raspberries now, and another 3/4 pound of strawberries

Guess what I''ll be doing later

chris_m

Pyxis wrote: »

I don't have satnav. When I bought my car, it wasn't a standard feature but an optional extra, and I chose not to have it,

It was an optional extra on mine too, and Mercedes wanted 600 notes for the box - the wiring and receiver is built-in as standard. I decided that 600 notes was over the top so made a bracket to mount my PDA with satnav.

Then I found that I could get a second-hand unit for the car for £200-£250 and, as it fits discretely in the glovebox and uses the same screen as the stereo and reversing camera I went for one.

as I like maps, and I like working out a route for myself.

Me too - it's fun annoying the hell out of the satnav buy ignoring its suggestions

So now the combination of a physical map, Google Earth

I find Google Maps is sufficient for my needs (as well as my OS maps), but that Street View is extremely handy for checking destinations.
When I was looking for a dentist, I found one in Ambleside but didn't have a clue exactly where, other than it being on Rydal Road, where one can't really stop, let alone park. Street View sorted that perfectly, so I knew exactly where to go and where I could park.

PasturesNew

Yet another wet day. I had ideas about going to 3 car boots this morning, but no car boots in the rain.

There's nothing to do/nowhere to go out to when it rains ....