Are you a worrier?

happyandcontented

I am.

I hate myself for doing it but every time there is a problem I go through every scenario, fixating on the worst possible outcome. I literally worry myself sick and often can't sleep for worrying.

My mother used to do it and it drove me mad and now I am doing the same thing. I think it is a learned response, but as I get older it is becoming worse. Mostly in relation to kids or work.

Logically, I know it doesn't/won't/can't change the outcome but I simply can't seem to stop,

Has anyone managed to train themselves out of this?

Kim_kim

I am a natural worrier.

I don't really want to change. It makes me good at my job. A
I'll always have plans to deal with problems, because I will have mulled over the various scenarios.

happyandcontented

I think it can be useful, but I think my worrying is getting out of control.

74jax

I am totally the opposite, I very very rarely worry and don't lose sleep over situations etc.

I can't really advise, as I don't know why I am this way.

balletshoes

This is interesting to me, as I'm also not a worrier - theres been very little over my 30 adult years thats had me kept awake worrying about it.
I don't dissect every decision or event that happens, and I only really "worry" about it if theres imminent threat to life or limb, or if theres a real chance it may affect the ability to keep the roof over my head or food on the table.
I refuse to worry about work - I don't get paid enough to bring work problems home with me!

Now, I will say, having a child has changed that slightly :cool: - I get niggles of worry for her, as she gets older and starts spreading her wings. But, so far, still no sleepless nights.

DigForVictory

I slide along the worry spectrum a bit.
When one of the lads is off doing something - I can stay up wondering a bit hard. Likewise, when I'm about to do something new, I can get pre-show jitters aplenty.

However, when I'm about to do something again and I find myself twitching, I grab the iphone & start making detailed lists.

Plus if I think *I* worry, I just run a mental eye over my mother. She has it down to an Olympic medal winning art. Since my worrying talents are so feeble in comparison, it's easier just to make lists.

heuchera

I think it's lack of confidence. What if this happens, what if that happens.. how would I cope, what would I do, etc etc

But if you're imagining morbid scenarios or dwelling on things too much it might be time to try and re-train yourself a bit. I think a lot of our habits are picked up from family or people we were influenced by in our formative years.

pigpen

Far from it.. I don't see the point.. you cannot change some times so you find a way to deal with it.. or you can change something in which case.. do it.. what is the point in fretting over any of it?

I may discuss several ways to deal with a situation, usually with myself.. but losing sleep over something I cannot do a thing about won't ever happen.

Kim_kim

heuchera wrote: »

I think it's lack of confidence. What if this happens, what if that happens.. how would I cope, what would I do, etc etc

But if you're imagining morbid scenarios or dwelling on things too much it might be time to try and re-train yourself a bit. I think a lot of our habits are picked up from family or people we were influenced by in our formative years.

I disagree with lack of confidence.

Like I said, I'm a planner, so I go through the various senarios & have plans to cope with whatever outcome.
I'm a person who likes to have a safety net in place & a plan b ready to roll out.

prosaver

what ever you worry about...think how to solve it and if you cant whats the point in worring about it.
eg worry about get in old
50 years old..... Im old
The average age of a man is 80

so Ive got 30 years left.

It depends how you look at things

bylromarha

happyandcontented wrote: »

I am.

I hate myself for doing it but every time there is a problem I go through every scenario, fixating on the worst possible outcome. I literally worry myself sick and often can't sleep for worrying.

My mother used to do it and it drove me mad and now I am doing the same thing. I think it is a learned response, but as I get older it is becoming worse. Mostly in relation to kids or work.

Logically, I know it doesn't/won't/can't change the outcome but I simply can't seem to stop,

Has anyone managed to train themselves out of this?

I don't think my situation got to the place where yours sounds like, but I often talk to myself in the mirror. I talk truth to myself.

I look myself in the eye. I say things like...the chance of baby Byl being run over by a car is 0.000001%. If you worry about it, it will still be 0.00000001%. The 0.00000001% is such a small chance of something happening. It is far more likely to happen to someone else. Now focus on the 99.9999999999999% which will be far more beneficial to baby Byl.

I don't need to do it so much now, but a useful technique which worked for me. And a notebook by the bed to write down anything which wakes me up at 3am.