So... who's done the school run in pyjamas?

Jagraf

pickledonionspaceraider wrote: »

I can - now, after a lot of work, but like I say it didn't come natural to me to do so. I really do try not to be judgemental on anything other than peoples attitudes and how they treat other people, + personality

I really go out of my way to try and treat people with empathy as no one knows what is going in in someone else's life/head - or why they were unable to get dressed that morning for example. It may look a certain way, ie lazy, but to that person, their priorities may be different that morning for some reason that is not apparent and I feel that I do not have the right to judge someone on something as small as their clothes when they may have far bigger issues going on.

Rightly or wrongly what people wear to go out in, I do think we could all benefit from being a little kinder and tolerant of each other as society really does have far bigger problems than these

But what you do judge on is just as subjective surely. If someone is angry / ignores you it may be because they also have reasons that are not apparent. You are still making a judgment. Do you also ignore how you are treated by others?

Jagraf

pickledonionspaceraider wrote: »

In reality it does to some people

You do not live to please others, nor seek their approval. Some of us are comfortable in our own skin and seek values elsewhere

Really? Whereas I agree with the concept of not pleasing others, or seek their approval, we all do it daily. You judge on personality and how they treat other people, why? Aren't they pleasing others in the way they treat people?

missbiggles1

pickledonionspaceraider wrote: »

In reality it does to some people

You do not live to please others, nor seek their approval. Some of us are comfortable in our own skin and seek values elsewhere

I don't think it's so much a question of pleasing others as much as expressing yourself.

What's the point of expressing yourself in what you wear if people are just going to ignore it? They might equally ignore you when you express yourself verbally which most of us would consider to be really rude.

pickledonionspaceraider

Jagraf wrote: »

Really? Whereas I agree with the concept of not pleasing others, or seek their approval, we all do it daily. You judge on personality and how they treat other people, why? Aren't they pleasing others in the way they treat people?

Don't let other peoples opinions threaten you and make you come back all defensive. It is OK to be different...Breathe

''we all do it daily'' - you live on a planet of billions of individuals for which you are not the spokesperson for each

pickledonionspaceraider

missbiggles1 wrote: »

I don't think it's so much a question of pleasing others as much as expressing yourself.

What's the point of expressing yourself in what you wear if people are just going to ignore it? They might equally ignore you when you express yourself verbally which most of us would consider to be really rude.

If a person is expressing themselves through what they wear, I would assume they are doing it for their own benefit - as I myself would - wear the clothes you enjoy wearing - and not worry if others ignore it

Yes verbally ignoring someone is rude

Caroline_a

To me, one of the problems of the pj wearing parents is that if they 'protest' against the head's letter, they are setting a really poor example. Some people have already mentioned this, but I've seen youngsters coming into work in totally inappropriate clothing for work - not pjs, but exceptionally short skirts combined with very low tops, low-slung ripped jeans for boys showing underpants, and in a couple of cases they were told to go home and change.

Very few companies now expect people to come dressed in suits, but there are still dress standards to be followed. If parents are demonstrating that 'nobody can tell me what to wear' it then becomes a difficult lesson for teenagers starting work when their bosses can tell them what to wear - or risk losing their job!

Jagraf

pickledonionspaceraider wrote: »

I did just type a long response but deleted it, as was not apparent in your first posts but you are clearly just looking to argue.

Don't let other peoples opinions threaten you and make you come back all defensive. It is OK to be different...Breathe

''we all do it daily'' - you live on a planet of billions of individuals for which you are not the spokesperson for each?

I am clearly just looking to argue? Is that not a judgment?

I am trying to suggest that everyone actually does judge - we cannot help it.

I would not employ someone who turned up for an interview in pyjamas - surely them trying to please me is a good thing for them?

I actually think pleasing people is a lovely human attribute - I don't feel threatened by it.

pickledonionspaceraider

Jagraf wrote: »

I am clearly just looking to argue? Is that not a judgment?

I am trying to suggest that everyone actually does judge - we cannot help it.

I would not employ someone who turned up for an interview in pyjamas - surely them trying to please me is a good thing for them?

No I am trying to avoid an argument but yes it is a judgement (based on your behaviour)

I agree about the interview thing - there are times and places for thinking like a hippy and living in the trees. If I go to an interview I am going to dress appropriately, for the job type, as I do realise how society judges these things and in some situations there are no choice but to conform . Or you just don't get the job, rightly or wrongly, that is just the way it is, but nevertheless it doesn't mean I agree with it just because I know it is there

As soon as I get out, I am letting my dreadlocks out and rocking some tie dye

Pleasing people is a lovely human attribute, I would never disagree with that sentiment - that in itself is a completely different thing to seeking other peoples approval, in general.

Any way I shall leave you to it now - good evening all

heuchera

Jagraf wrote: »

I am clearly just looking to argue? Is that not a judgment?

I am trying to suggest that everyone actually does judge - we cannot help it.

I would not employ someone who turned up for an interview in pyjamas - surely them trying to please me is a good thing for them?

I actually think pleasing people is a lovely human attribute - I don't feel threatened by it.

She's done what she often does.. typed something provocative, got a response then gone back in and edited her post. You've quoted her post before she snuck back in and deleted the first bit :beer:

Jagraf

pickledonionspaceraider wrote: »

No I am trying to avoid an argument but yes it is a judgement (based on your behaviour)

I agree about the interview thing - there are times and places for thinking like a hippy and living in the trees. If I go to an interview I am going to dress appropriately, for the job type, as I do realise how society judges these things and in some situations there are no choice but to conform . Or you just don't get the job, rightly or wrongly, that is just the way it is, but nevertheless it doesn't mean I agree with it just because I know it is there

As soon as I get out, I am letting my dreadlocks out and rocking some tie dye

Pleasing people is a lovely human attribute, I do not disagree. Pleasing peoples souls is most rewarding

I agree with you on some points, i was just making the point that other people do judge. And sometimes conformity is the social "norm".

When you get out of where ? ::eek::)