KonMari 2016 - The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up

Karmacat

GreyQueen wrote: »

The funeral industry is one big scam, imo. They know people aren't in their right minds for grief, are physically and emotionally exhausted, don't want to look 'cheap' in front of the funeral director, or the other family members and the wider circle, so they've got you coming and gong.

I loved this whole post, GQ, but this paragraph in particular reminded me of something that happened with the florist we used last month for my mum's funeral. He seemed fine at first - he was even talking to us in terms of "this is two feet long and will cost £60" etc etc - in the end I said to him, "we're concerned with how appropriate it looks on the coffin, not with how much it costs". We spent £80, which we could afford to do (apologies to all who can't, but that was the reality) and it looked lovely. BUT BUT BUT ... my sister in law went to the same shop to buy a bouquet on behalf of her sisters (though we'd asked for donations to the RNLI) and he egged her on to upgrade by telling her how much *we'd* spent! I was horrified :eek: The egging on included ringing and texting too

A_Frayed_Knot wrote: »

Feel like I am interrupting, sort of , but came on here, as decided as part of the NY was to get house in order. With hearing about the weather coming, thought I need to go out and get myself a pair of winter boots for the snow, then thought - hold on - I've already got a pair, or two or three or four oops !!! so decided NOT to go get myself a.n.other pair and start MK'd instead:A lol :rotfl:

This is what a general thread is - there are several conversations going on at once welcome in

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Charis

PollyWollyDoodle wrote: »

Thanks for that, Charis - that's interesting. I think finding the 'right' way to dispose of Stuff can be really problematic especially if you're concerned about the environment and it can paralyse us and stop us moving on. I hate sending stuff to landfill and my general waste bin is always the smallest part of my rubbish collection. And then I go to the tip and realise that many of my fellow citizens have no compunction at all about throwing away perfectly good items ...
[...] I also like the idea that we're just custodians.

You're right, Polly. In the long term we own nothing at all

Re your comment about fellow citizens, even the local authorities are guilty of indifference. We can't take paint to our local HWRC, the nearest that will take it involves a 30 mile round trip via a city. So we nip over the county border (same company dealing with waste) and leave it at their HWRC. When my son helped me clear out some stuff, we took it thinking it would be taken somewhere where various parts could be salvaged for reuse - eg the copper and metal in some items. Not a bit of it. Almost everything was designated to the same big skip, including the paint that our recycling centre considers unacceptable. I thought we had the wrong skip until I saw the many dried paint splashes inside the walls of the skip. I suppose if you have the time, skills, appropriate tools and inclination you could render everything down to its component parts but most of us simply don't have all those things. The only firm I know that accepts used item returns is Apple and I gather they only reuse some of the component parts. They also need the aluminium from the cases. Japanese producers seem to have more responsibility post-sale, paid for, it seems, by pre-sale taxes. It puts up the price, but if it slows down consumption and makes us inclined to look for durability rather than shine, it may help instill a little responsibility in consumer and producer alike.

Well, I can dream .

PollyWollyDoodle

I always assume that if you take stuff to the electrical recycling bit of the dump, they recover any valuable parts but perhaps I'm being a bit naive.
It's a bit depressing to think about the amount of waste that goes on. Unfortunately any restrictions on what you can throw away just seem to lead to more fly tipping.

My Thought for The Day - after reading GQ's posts above, and tying in with the funeral theme! When I die, the eulogy isn't going to be about the beautiful ornaments I owned, or how many books I had or the clothes I wore. It'll be about the things I said and did.

If the books make me better educated and more aware of the world, if cooking equipment and craft supplies etc help me to make things for others, if the ornaments and stuff make my home a pleasant place and make me contented then they're serving a purpose. They are helping me to be the person I want to be. If they're stuck in storage, unused or making my life harder - then what's the point? They're not going (I hope) to talk about my complete collection of Something or that 'you couldn't turn round in Polly's home without tripping over a cat ornament'!

Mamasaver if you think you'll need this stuff again but not right now, then can you store it? Or is it the case that it got you out of trouble once and you're a bit scared to let go in case you need it again ... keeping a room full of stuff you don't use or need doesn't make sense, but only you can decide whether it's necessary or you need to let go. As said above, the cost is already sunk. Hanging on to it doesn't make it valuable - maybe it's served it's purpose and can be let go.

GreyQueen

I'd describe myself as of a cautious temperament and, in the case of the money-earning potential of MamaSaver's mysterious equipment, I think I'd want to keep it so there was a reserve occupation available if the main occupation isn't providing for the family.

After all, the economy has always had the potential for flux and reversals and with B****t (we won't mention the dread word) it's perfectly possible that some unexpected things might happen to disrupt business as usual.

If the decision is to keep it, I wonder if it's possible to reorganise the storage to make it a bit less overwhelming? Don't disdain options as basic as chucking cloths (old sheets?) over something to hide the gubbins from casual sight. You might want to lock the door to keep that room out of the general flow of life and perhaps, if you're as mischievous as me, post a Here Be Dragons notice on the outside to deter visitors.

I had every intention of trotting down to the chazzers with the mobile and a rag bag after work today, but it's getting bitterly cold and I didn't fancy turning out again. I will make sure I offload these items in the next week or so, as I want both the space and the emotional lightness.

Karmakat, it's bliddy :mad: about the flowers, nothing other than gross manipulation, no wonder you're cross.

The situation with funerals is, frankly, getting out of hand, I'm sure I've seen something in the media in the past few months about MPs getting involved as constituents are getting in touch about the impossibility of paying for these things. Even if you want things very very simple, the costs seem to head into four figures.

Although one cannot know the hour or the day, and there's no natural law which says I should not pre-decease my parents, it is likely that I will be organising their funerals rather than vice versa. I have already discussed coffins and my mother, a keen amateur woodworker and lover of the material, agrees with me that we wouldn't want a timber coffin because it would be a waste.

I've been a keen green type all my life and would like to go off as ecologically as possible.

Actually, I must draft a document to keep with my Will (or the copy I hold, the original being with the solicitor). About making a very basic disposal and getting someone to pull my gold crowns and weigh them in for scrap, should fund a few glasses of sherbet at the bar.:rotfl:

oceanspirit

Still not much kondoing going on although have passed on a gifted book which has been read. Have started on the next one - don't want these new arrivals getting too comfy here.

Another one who just wants a cheapy cremation with no service or persons present. Have arranged to open a joint account (we have spoken about it and it's on the to do list) with OH so he'll have access to the funds and there'll be plenty to pay for the party.

Have mentioned it to closest friends too so if OH goes at the same time, they know what to do with me. Have specified where I'd like ashes to go, but the party is for those left behind not me so they can choose the venue.

Igamogam

Kondoed a bin liner full of packaging to a regular freegler and a large box of books and DVDs to Ziff!t - got a tenner or so for them which is better than nothing

Pooky

Just as an aside there are forms to download and fill in to make sure your body is available to be donated to science on your death, if they want it. Typically DH had downloaded the forms ready for his brothers signature earlier last year but he died before he could sign. His illness was so rare (last known case in the U.K. Was 1980's) that his Drs would have loved the chance to see what was what but without his consent it couldn't happen.

If science does want you then they dispose of you too so no further costs.

greent

Small number of books and dvds boxed up ready for Ziffit - about £10 worth - every little helps! Any which Ziffit didn't want have been added to CS bag for donating on Fri (weather permitting!)
More paperwork has been recycled/ burned.. may actually file some someday!

GreyQueen

Righty, I have now drafted a one page 'letter' which outlines my exact wishes for my mortal remains; recycle if possible via organ donation, direct cremate the rest with no funeral and scatter the ashes somewhere (anywhere) in nature so the potash is useful.

And absolutely no fuss and definately nor religion of any kind.

I have printed off two copies, signed and dated them and placed them in a labelled envelope along with my Will, which is the copy and sits in a folder called Will. Can't be more specific than that, can I?:rotfl:

It gladdens my little control freaky heart to have that done and dusted. Now, if my nearest and dearest only do what they're told, they shouldn't have too much expense and hassle. Result!

Floss

Our HWRC is pretty good on most things - green, cardboard, plasterboard, plastic, metal, rubble (but only small amounts), paint, textiles, non-recyclable, oil, fridges & freezers, asbestos (if in sealed bags). They also have a shop selling refurbished electricals and lots of other items picked up by the staff from people's bringings. We've had quite a few things from there - a 1950's maple 3-piece bedroom suite (wardrobe, dressing table & od for £50), wicker chair, chest of drawers, 2 chairs from The Pier, Lloyd Loom laundry bin, cane chair and 2 chrome bar stools