KonMari 2016 - The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up

greent

Cardboard coffins can be ok - we had a custom designed one for my mil 16 months ago and it was less than £500 - and it was amazing - a total conversation piece. You can shop around but people aren't inclined to at such a stressful time. Used same co (and funeral director) for my uncle last Summer - a small customisation to a standard design this time and was also a good price. x

Broomstick

Given the decluttering theme of the thread, take a look at this really clever idea:
http://www.williamwarren.co.uk/2009/10/shelves-for-life/

B x

Charis

PollyWollyDoodle wrote: »

Lessonlearned, I'm sorry to hear about your dad.

In most cases, funeral directors will give you time to pay, and banks will usually release funds for the funeral directly to the Funeral Directors) on production of the invoice and a death certificate.

When my mother and her sister died within weeks of each other in 2012, neither left a will. Although each had more than enough to pay for their own, rather expensive burials in a London Borough, neither of their banks would pay from the deceased's accounts. My solicitor told me that only those two banks, to his knowledge, had this rule. Mum was with S*nt*nder and Aunt was with the P*st Off*ce. I was really annoyed as I had to pay both from my own savings and wait until I had the 'letters of administration' months later, while the money just sat in their bank accounts. It was doubly annoying that the DWP had recommended the PO Bank to seniors if they hadn't got a bank because they have to have a bank account to get their pension now.

Having read that some people on this site have got into big debt because they originally borrowed a little money I wondered what would have happened if other really skint people's relatives were with the same banks. I complained to both banks and got short shrift. So I complained to my MP, who contacted various persons including two MP's in charge of such matters and two bigwigs. I eventually received an apology from both banks and a promise that from now on they would pay a deceased's funeral bill from their own account. I think having the names of a Lord and a member of the cabinet on letter caused them to shift their attitude.

None of the lesser dignitaries seemed to care a jot, one in particular said that it might inconvenience some people but blah blah blah. I thought she simply didn't understand what it's like to have n o t h i n g. How easily the safety net fails and the sharks get through. So, if anyone else does have trouble, There is a precedent and contacting your MP is the most direct (and cheapest) route. I dread to think what my solicitor would have charged to chase it up.

Incidentally I discovered that once you take responsibility for dealing with a funeral, it doesn't even matter if the deceased has nothing in the bank, and is on benefits, it will be your responsibility to pay the bill unless you, yourself, are receiving benefits and are eligible to claim. That may have changed in the almost five years since I read it, but I can't imagine the DWP have become more generous in the light of all the other cuts.

PollyWollyDoodle

Broomstick wrote: »

Given the decluttering theme of the thread, take a look at this really clever idea:
http://www.williamwarren.co.uk/2009/10/shelves-for-life/

B x

That is absolutely brilliant - thank you, Broomstick! I wish I was handy at carpentry ...

Charis

MMF007 wrote: »

I briefly wondered whether to specify that my ashes should be scattered somewhere sunny abroad, just so the benficiaries would have a holiday

That sounds like an excellent idea.

kondo folded pj's - top folded into trousers so pairs stay together,

That sounds like another excellent idea. I struggled this afternoon with ironing the trouser legs, that awful t shirt material that twists out of shape, and then with folding the top to make a neat square, being that I am nothing like MK's tiny, elfin shape. More like Nelly the elephant. Putting one trouser leg inside the other, then folding in the tops makes much more sense than trying to fashion a spinnaker into a neat square.
Thank you for both ideas :j

GreyQueen

Morning all.

As some of you may know, I work for a local authority. If a person dies without funds, and there is no one able or willing to take on the funeral expenses, the local authority whose area in which they die (which may not be the same one in which they lived) can take on the funeral.

This was what in the olden days was called the pauper's funeral, or the nine o'clock trot. It's not an undignified event but obviously not fancy. There are less than a dozen of these per year in our city, so it's not a common thing.

People who may be separated but not divorced need to know that they are legally still next of kin, and they are likely to be contacted to arrange and pay for a funeral in the event of the ex's passing. Which is why it's not the best idea to live in that status.

If this is your situation, the best reaction to being contacted by a funeral director would be no reaction, certainly not to make a payment or part-payment which could establish a precedent that you should pay all.

Funerals have become hideously expensive in the past few years, largely due to the buying up on what are still branded as family firms by huge American corporations. A friend of a friend inherited his father's funeral business (small operation) and was bought out in this way.

He was paid so much, he was able to retire in his late thirties and live off the income. Firm is still trading under the family name.

Floss

Can I suggest that anyone wishing to have a non-wooden casket, contacts their local crem office for advice. Some are not suitable for cremation due to the strict emissions rules applied to crematoria, hence the relatively high cost of cardboard coffins as they need to be made of a particular material.

Pooky

There's lots of advice about direct cremation out there, my parents have settled on an undertakers near them that offer the service and have left strict instructions to myself and sister. The whole package including collection, cardboard coffin, paperwork and cremation (which might even be 2 or 3 counties over depending on space) is just under £900. From one lot of literature I read, they aim to have the body cremated within 48 hours which seems ideal. I think you can opt to have the ashes returned for extra but I don't really understand why people would want to.

Of course it's not everyone's idea of how it should be done but it suits our family perfectly.

On a less sombre note, I kondod lots of stuff to the "trade in shop" and managed to make an extra overpayment to the mortgage this month. Whilst we, as a family, used to love playing silly console games/quiz games, they hadn't been touched for months and no one minded that they go. Added a few DVDs and CDS that another trade in website weren't interested in and 3 big bags for life worth of clutter left the house.

silvasava

Thank you all so much for the information on funeral options. I didn't know you could have a direct cremation and that would suit me perfectly! Lots of food for thought as I am determined to have my end sorted so the family don't have to make any decisions for me.
I have a confession to make - I am about to store a halogen cooker, kettle and toaster in my loft. They were all from the caravan and when my kitchen is being done I know I will be without a cooker so will need them. The kettle was bought as DH thought ours was on its last legs however it's still functioning but don't know for how long! They are cluttering my kitchen so away they are going. I'll slink away now.

maryb

Why slink away? I can't think of anything less joyful than not having the means of putting meals together when you are in the middle of kitchen chaos so I would say they are a definite keeper