Mooloo's little tapestry of life, 2016

thorsoak

Mooloo, what you have to remember is that you are not her friend, you are her grandmother AND guardian and you have to set boundaries which you - as well as she - respect. No point in saying one thing today, then contradicting it tomorrow.

Let her earn her kindle time - so much clearing up equals so many minutes etc. And save money in the budget by not even buying the snacks and treats etc - if they aren't in the house she can't get them. At 6stone she is overweight, and it will only get worse if you don't take steps now.

ognum

thorsoak wrote: »

Mooloo, what you have to remember is that you are not her friend, you are her grandmother AND guardian and you have to set boundaries which you - as well as she - respect. No point in saying one thing today, then contradicting it tomorrow.

Let her earn her kindle time - so much clearing up equals so many minutes etc. And save money in the budget by not even buying the snacks and treats etc - if they aren't in the house she can't get them. At 6stone she is overweight, and it will only get worse if you don't take steps now.

While not disagreeing with these words I think often they are much easier to say than to do.

It is difficult when a child has come to you through difficult circumstances. The overwhelming desire is to give love and not to 'rock the boat' even if you really know what you are doing is not the right thing.

There is a good reason why young women conceive, they have the energy and stamina to deal with the clever, interesting, stubborn, wonderful minds of the young, and it does take energy.

Any woman dealing with a fledgling buisness, other family members with thier share of problems, the death of a loved one, the physical challenges of another and financial constraints would often turn to the easy option just to protect thier sanity and well being.

Mooloo, you are doing a great job providing a stable home for your grand daughter. There are probably just a few tweeks you need to make to help both you and her along the road but never forget how well you are doing.

Savvy_sewing

Thanks both.
I know that I am not always consistent sometimes because I am busy doing something or because it is for an easier life (at the time). But I also did compensate for the fact she was vulnerable and it is sometimes a case of picking my battles.

I have had a strange day at work and not made much headway with some of the jobs. I am just about to close the shop and go and get my car from the garage.
Tonight is brownies so we need to be quick with tea.
I will be glad to see my bed tonight

thorsoak

You are doing a good job, Mooloo - everybody has a wobble at times, and you are doing a great "plate juggling" job with the shop and DGD.

As you say she is vulnerable and it is because she is vulnerable that you have to set targets and limitations and stick to them - broken record time again, I'm afraid. If you stop buying the treats, she can't get into trouble for picking at them when she wants - and if you bargain kindle time for little tasks - putting her dirty clothes in the wash basket, putting her breakfast things in the sink (or even doing the washing up) then again, she gets rewards. Believe me, I juggled 4 children (from 6 to 16 plus a brain-damaged husband and commuting to London every day and needed to bargain jobs around the house with rewards - in my case lifts for the older 2 to & from friends etc. Not easy but it does work xxxx

Savvy_sewing

I have had a rough night and fell getting up to go to the loo around 4.30 this morning landing on my left wrist against the corner of a protruding wall. Needless to say I have not slept very well since. I gave up at 5.45 and made my cup of tea, used my SAD lamp and studied some Personal Development things.
6.30 alarms just gone off, so time to launch myself into the day properly and I am aiming for as much positivity as I can muster to produce some better momentum at home and work. Especially at work as I have had to move savings to cover the shops rent. I haven't had well paying jobs, just time consuming ones with really no time cost value.
I am going to have to stop paying myself for a while now, as there is no more money or good cash flow work in -yet! And with the Christmas break coming up and the traditional slow new year, I need to be practical, and focus on not wasting my money.
I am determined to get through the next few months and keep my business going. I will have to be vigilant and look for opportunities that are cost effective.
I have a long way to go yet, before the business will support itself and me.
Time to move. I will try not to fall out of bed this time!

Savvy_sewing

I had a better day. Dgd and I walked to school with my neighbour's little girl.
I then had to defrost the car and only just got to work on time. Just as well I took the car as I had forgotten I was babysitting the other children tonight.
I had scheduled my day fairly well and actually was much more productive today. Despite lots of fittings. I managed to sew £175 worth of work.
Between 9.40 and 4.30.
I am now at Biggest of Mooloo's and cooking some tea.
I have planned my day for tomorrow as I have a lot to fit in.
I am hoping to keep up the momentum and get the school uniform ready and as much of the lunches as I can before I go to bed tonight and remember to put the bins out.

Savvy_sewing

If I ever say I have an order for Roman Blinds again please tell me NO.
Two months ago I made a lady some Blinds and today she is complaining that the rods are bent, and the strings aren't attached properly.
I luckily took photos of the blind before it left my shop and the strings were attached and the rods were straight.
I wonder how she stored it over the last two months!
I will have to go round now to explain that they use the little toggles to adjust the strings.
But I can not be responsible for her bending the rods.
Last winter I had a nightmare month waiting for someone to return Blinds she said were wrong, and it turned out that the strings had un clipped.

I am sometimes baffled at people who cannot hang something and adjust it with the instructions provided too.
I really am just not feeling that the money paid for all my efforts is worth doing them.
Receiving an email mid my day off has put me in stress mode as I cannot go and sort it out until after my dental surgery tomorrow. I don't think I will be in any mood to deal with an idiot.

Savvy_sewing

Today starts the next step in my dental work. The bridge has to come out and a screw put into my jaw ready for my implant tooth in a few months. I am dreading this and feel sick already.
Just want to get the day over with.

sarathebest

Good luck Mooloo - you are very brave.

ivyleaf

Mooloo I'll be thinking of you today. My OH had 4 implants done last year and is so glad he did it. It won't be nearly as bad as you fear, and is so worth it! xx