Time to grow up.

JustAboutThere

Megano,

You've absolutely done the right thing in getting rid of W3. As you've said, if everyone pulled their weight, you wouldn't mind so much, but its not much fun when they're (literally) taking the p**s!

Enough some more *me/OH* time. You deserve it.

chevalier

Wow what a continued roller coaster. well done on ditching W3 that is taking the mickey big time.
I think you need to realise that the stress of BIL situation is bound to have a magnifying effect on any even minor flaws in your relationship. Have you REALLY sat down and explained to your OH why you want to be debt free? Or are you just assuming it is obvious. Does HE want to be saving for a house etc? Does he see it as important? It obviously is very important to you...
chev

Megano

I've heard NOTHING from W3 - like I wasn't expecting a parade of "please don't go. Your the glue that holds us all together" but I did get the manager another job by recommending her to do the doctor surgery meaning she's got another 16 hours a week so I would expect a "sorry your gone" but nope not heard a peep, nothing, nada but as they say just when 1 door closes another opens because the manager from W4 - sorry its getting confusing I know - called me and says he's got a key holder job which can be done ANYTIME before 10am and Im like perfect! So Ive to go see him on Monday.

I followed Martin Lewis's advice and done the credit card shuffle with capital one and applied for a barclaycard 0% interest on balance transfer and I got accepted! They have given me a credit limit of £4200 and Im like WOAH! I don't need that much! So with the money i would be paying the credit card I'll be able to get rid of the overdraft once and for all! :T:T:T:T:T (plus I went through TCB so got a sneaky payment of £27.00 in my TCB account)

PAYDAY today and just dipping my toes in repayments so starting with a £100 payment to the BOM.

BIL had his meeting with SS and he's been granted FLP for an overnight visit starting next Wednesday which is a great step forward! Can't wait to see FLP again on Saturday everytime I speak to him on the phone he says "Aunty Negan working hard" and I'm like aww my heart is melting! I bought him a toy dinosaur from London and now he keeps feeding it everything he's eaten so its covered in tomato sauce and yogurt. Aww he's my sweetheart.

Megano

I TOOK THE PLUNGE - GOODBYE OVERDRAFT! So long! Farewell! GOODBYE

lauzt1987

Megano, I have been a long time lurker of your diary (that sounds really stalkery) and have never commented so just wanted to say hello, from one Glaswegian to another, and that I think you are doing fab! Keep it up as I love reading about what you've been up to. Laura x

Willowpop

Keep going Megano, and have a wee chat with OH.
See where he is with the saving for a house thing.
Don't assume he knows you're wanting more time with him, or you're wanting to clear debts etc... men (sorry men, massive generalisation coming) can't read our minds. 😀
One thing I will say is that if he isn't ready to knuckle down and pay off his debts then yiu can't make him do it... He will have to want to do it himself, otherwise it'll be the root of lots of arguments.
So what do you do? Keep doing what you're doing. Clear he debts in your name. Get yourself into a good financial position with a few quid behind you...and then when you're there, that might just spur OH into action.

You're doing a great job though. Well done. 😀

Megano

Maybe my title was a little overdramatic - who? me? never!

So let's start at the beginning

I managed to get the back office job at W1. It's pretty cool as it's more of an admin role so I won't be speaking to customers as much plus the working hours are so much better! The latest I'll ever work is 8pm plus every Sunday off which means more time with FLP - its a drop in wages however because Im not working crazy hours but I still think it will be worth it.
As soon as I got told I got the back office role I then got a phone call to say I got the cleaning job at the restaurant so Im back to being a 3 job person - granted Im technically not going to be earning any extra because of the shortfall - it seems like a good place to work its a small family restaurant and I have the keys so as long as its done before 10am I can come and go as I want. The downside is they are wanting me to go in everyday, 7 days a week. Granted it's only an hour a day so its nothing major but I'll never have a lie in again! We've agreed its a week trial so more to follow

My poor bank balance took such a pounding at the weekend it was the team night out and then I was at the Biffy concert and lets just say many many drinks were taken, but its all good - except on Saturday I was fast asleep in bed and BOOM next thing I knew I was on the floor. Turns out the metal frame collapsed so when I was texting the landlord he's started getting really fussy
-Why did it happen?
*I dunno it just did but we need to replace it
- Why should I have to replace it?
*No one is saying you need to I'll replace it. I found a belter on Gumtree for £100
- But I paid £500 for that bed
*....................^cough^ !!!!!!!! ^cough^ well Im not spending £500 on a bed because the sofas are f*cked so we were planning on spending money on that
- I have a solution for that!
*Cool what is it?
-................................................a £100 bed doesn't sound like a long term investment
*Why don't you pick the bed and I'll buy it?

And then nothing, nanda (since Sunday.) Maybe he's been abducted by aliens, maybe he's been kidnapped, maybe he's just being a !!!!. Either way the master bed is broke (thank god we ant subletting at the moment otherwise we would be sleeping on the floor!)

FINALLY
You know when your out in a club and you hook up with someone and you put there number in your phone and when you sober up you realised that the person was god awful and you would never do that to yourself again. Then before you know its the weekend and your drunk and horny so you text every person in your phone including the "What was I thinking?" - No? Just me? err okay then.
Well I found myself texting the old W3 begin like a boyband saying take me back - as soon as I hit the sent button I instantly got the senders remorse but the silver lining is she hasn't texted me back - maybe the network went down at that very second and the text message has been lost forever.

Oh 1 final thing and its nothing to do with money. I was wandering around the city centre and I walked by the blood donation place in Nelson Mandela place and I was like YEAH lets do it! (first time ever done) and I swear I was an emotional rollercoaster. There was tears and nerves but I did it. Im officially a life saver!

Megano

The point of taking the pay cut at W1 was to spend more time with the boy and FLP - by getting another W3 especially before work its counteracting that choice and eating into the time I should be spending on my relationships.
-Yes its bringing in an extra £100 or so and I understand I have my goals but I'm reaching those goals without the extra and I know I don't have an emergency fund
- Yes I feel awful as I understand I've f**cked around the new W3 (and lets face it the old one)
- Yes I'll probably change my mind a million times and change it back a million and 1 more times

On the plus side the back office job ALWAYS has overtime, they are pretty much begging for folk on a daily basis - so I guess Im trying to say. Going forward Im a two job person

Megano

A few weeks ago I sent old W4 (doctor surgery) a message saying I'm sorry for messing him around and if another opportunity came up to give me a shout - well it turns out he still needs someone to do the 6 hours a week doctor surgery and I was like yeah of course. Let's do it!
Regarding OW3 (old work 3) I just realised I was the "the booty" from the "booty call" when the area manager texted me I jumped (okay maybe I didnt jump as i had to be up at 4.30 am) and headed to work. So I texted her and was like I can't do this my hours had changed at W1 (lie plus i missed out the screw you part) she was like yeah fine okay. A couple of days later I had the break up regret and texted her back like take me back! I can change! She blanked me and Im like OUCH
Now I'm not saying Im whiter than white in this situation - I understand I left suddenly but the last time I was there they were seriously understaffed so its like cutting her nose off to spite her face?
I was telling a work mate at W1 about the OW3 situation and the cleaner overheard me and said she would pass on my details to her manager as they are looking to expand :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

In terms of the bread and butter job W1 the new role is going good - I'm still waiting on some changed to be made to my work profile so right now its kinda "watch and learn" which is a little annoying but i'll live - there seems to be a strange amount off office tension and a lot of whispers about upper management which I'm not really understanding but then again I have only been there 3 days so maybe its too soon to get involved.

The landlord has finally agreed we can replace the bed (thank you Jesus!) now we have told him there is no way, shape or form we are spending £500 on a bed so he agreed we could replace it with a bed of similar quality?!?! (I swear i seen the exact same bed in b+m which is like the one we broke for £70. I honestly think he's talking rubbish in terms of how much he spent! He then turns around and says "your bed was a king size bed!" forgive me if a double bed mattress can fit perfectly in it Im going to take a wild stab in the dark and say its a double mattress.
In terms of the sofa he says he has got a solution which means he's giving us his old one (since he said so on Facebook - I knew us adding each other would be a bad idea)
Originally it was a case of he was going to buy one on gumtree. We were to pay for it, get it to the flat and get rid of the old ones and then reduce the 1/2 cost of it the following months rent and I was like err no why don't YOU go buy it (since after all its your flat) YOU can arrange to get it here and I'll give you the difference extra next month - he's an alright guy but i think providing the rent is getting paid he's reclucant to do anything. After the leak and the moving of the radiator we said the place would need to get redecorated (it hasn't been done in 3 years) and he said he couldn't afford it - yet on the same day he went and bought 10 tons of chips to do his driveway? Like we got a quote for someone to do the whole flat for £550 and he's like no. For god sake even if I got someone to do it surely he would still need to pay materials?

Megano

WOW I really went off the map for a while there didn't I?
- I have the most stupidest british problem ever that only i could get myself into!
So like all offices W1 has a cleaning firm that goes in the morning and makes everything lovely - so at the start of the month I asked one of the cleaners if they were looking for people and she is like "yeah but its 6 - 8.30 in the morning" and Im like damn every 3 weeks I start at work at 8 - no can do!
Then the women comes up and gives me a form and she's like fill this in and Im like but I start work at 8! and she's like don't you worry about that and then gives me a wink. I think I've managed to land myself a 4th job and OH is kinda upset.
- I thought the overtime at W1 was unlimited and always flowing like the rain - turns out I'm a beast in the department and now we've managed to catch up with all the work so overtime is going to be like rain in the desert - not very often and rare.
-My bike got stolen at work and honestly I'm gutted - its kinda my fault as I never locked it as it was stored in an underground car park.
-Done the barclaycard balance transfer so its goodbye capital one credit card! In terms of bad debt I just have the bank of mum and HMRC. I get that I have other cards but they are all 0% for a while so I'll be able to get them all cleared before the promotions run out.