Single adults with no kids - what do you do at Christmas?

duchy

miss_independent wrote: »

With all due respect, I do LOTS throughout the rest of the year but things shut down over christmas. I do put lots of effort into the rest of the year and have a very full life. Like a lot of other people, however, Christmas does make me realise that I don't have a family of my own and I would have liked to.

Really ?
What shuts down ?
Christmas day itself sure - but that is one single day.
Just about everything else is business as usual .
It's one single day and maybe you could focus on entertaining your parents for that one day if you like to keep busy and need to be fully occupied. Cooking a full Christmas dinner, washing up ...preparing a Christmas tea keeps many people fully occupied all day and they don't get a moment to relax til late evening.

Don't forget you can watch TV on a laptop or tablet so if you feel you need to stay in the same room watching it - do it with headphones.

Honestly though you are 31 - surely this stuff is basic . I was single between the ages of 23 and 30 and never had to wonder what to do - even if staying home -it was more finding the time for it all.

Person_one

miss_independent wrote: »

With all due respect, I do LOTS throughout the rest of the year but things shut down over christmas. I do put lots of effort into the rest of the year and have a very full life. Like a lot of other people, however, Christmas does make me realise that I don't have a family of my own and I would have liked to.

Sorry if I misread, when you said that you 'usually feel bored and alone' I took that to mean all year, but it seems you just meant every Christmas.

I bet your parents would be upset to hear that you don't think you have a family. While I'm sorry that things haven't worked out the way you wanted in terms of a relationship and children of your own, that is not the only definition of family.

There's a heck of a lot of pressure on single women to couple up and reproduce, especially once we hit 30, its rotten and its infuriating. Its not the only way to be happy and the messages that are sent out to women who either don't want that life or for whom it just doesn't happen are so unfair.

Mr_Costcutter

Don't focus upon what you 'haven't got' (husband and children), but rather on what you do have, which is your parents. There will come a time when they sadly aren't with you any longer and I'm sure you will yearn for the times when they were.

My daughter never thought she would find a nice chap and have children - but she did. When it no longer became the focus of her thoughts - it happened. Don't listen to those who say that it won't for you - they don't have a chrystal ball

barbiedoll

It's not just single people who find Christmas boring, I'm married with a kid and I find Christmas Day as boring as hell!

Every year I end up hosting it. Which means that I do the cooking. No-one will contemplate having anything other than the turkey roast dinner (which is exactly like every other roast dinner but with added parsnips) and I've only got a small oven, and a small kitchen/diner, so every year it's a juggling act with tins and pans and chairs and tables. I can't even drink as I have to drive to pick up and drop off my mum.

I much prefer Boxing Day when I can slob around with a plate of leftovers and a very large drink!

SailorSam

torbrex wrote: »

Are you my twin sister? :rotfl:

I think the three of us are twins.

miss_independent

Mr_Costcutter wrote: »

Don't focus upon what you 'haven't got' (husband and children), but rather on what you do have, which is your parents. There will come a time when they sadly aren't with you any longer and I'm sure you will yearn for the times when they were.

My daughter never thought she would find a nice chap and have children - but she did. When it no longer became the focus of her thoughts - it happened. Don't listen to those who say that it won't for you - they don't have a chrystal ball

Thank you Mr Costcutter, I appreciate what you've said a lot .

bylromarha

Not read the entire thread.

I noticed that your local friends are married with kids. Why not pop round to them for some of your day? Just cos we're married with kids, doesn't mean we don't like seeing our non kid friends (single or otherwise) on Christmas day. You've got a good chance getting outside with some of them if you pick the right family - look for the ones who are hiding large bicycle shaped packages away!

We've had singles/single parents/couples with/without kids popping in for a Cmas drink on Cmas day. We used to do it ourselves to another couple before we had kids. Maybe be a bit assertive and ask some of those local friends what time would be good for you to pop round for a snowball!

Bogof_Babe

If all else fails, there's always several of us posting on this website on Xmas day!

I spend the day alone out of choice, OH goes to his sister for the meal (they are both vegetarian, I'm not), but having done that for a few years it became extremely tedious, so I hosted it here for one year, but that made me stressed out (I don't do entertaining very well - can cook for the two of us but if there's anyone else I get in a flap ), and after that I decided s0d it it's my day too, and I prefer to slob around and relax. It seems to work. OH disappears for a few hours (he would actually rather stay with me but feels obliged to go to his sister as she doesn't have anyone else), returns about tea time and we just treat it as a normal day from then on.

sillyvixen

OP - treasure what you have - your parents, and time to spend with them. I got married this year and am out of necessity having to host Christmas for my husband, father and brother. As a veggie I have never had to cook a turkey in my life - Mum always did that and i would provide a veggie dish for myself. Now she is longer with us, I will try my best to recreate her efforts to give a bit of normality to my Dad and Brother.
Yes we will eat too much, drink too much and watch crap on tv as normal - but the real change is someone is missing - and if i can pull off a turkey dinner with all the trimmings, it wont mask that.

onlyroz

barbiedoll wrote: »

Every year I end up hosting it. Which means that I do the cooking. No-one will contemplate having anything other than the turkey roast dinner (which is exactly like every other roast dinner but with added parsnips) and I've only got a small oven, and a small kitchen/diner, so every year it's a juggling act with tins and pans and chairs and tables. I can't even drink as I have to drive to pick up and drop off my mum.

Can't you push mum into a taxi at the end of the day, or put her up in the spare room? As for cooking - get the food from M&S. Most of it is pre-prepared and just needs shoving in the oven for an hour at 180.