Best man speech

euronorris

Gavin83 wrote: »

That is probably the biggest concern. The groom has a sister there who's 12 and a brother who's 9 and that's the kids that I'm aware of.

I am lucky in that both sets of parents are pretty liberal. I think I could tell almost anything and the grooms parents would find it funny. The only one who is a bit touch and go is the mother of the bride. I am considering the suggestion of running the speech by her first, especially considering as they only live a mile away from me and I do know them pretty well.

I think that's a good idea. My DH's best man ran his speech past my MIL, and my DH had to keep reminding him how many kids would be there, and that my parents are a bit more straight-laced (so to speak). He did a good job, and didn't mortify anyone! lol

lulu_92

My OH is the best man at my sister's wedding (she's marrying his best friend). If he ran the speech past my mum she'd probably laugh no matter what!

My step-dad got some ribbing in the speech when he married my mum. There was one story that was very inappropriate, but the way he worded it meant it went over the heads of the little ones!

Pollycat

thriftyemma wrote: »

At mine and my now-ex-husband's wedding, the best man (who was in the forces, and also groom's brother) was called up for duty at the last minute. Groom's dad stepped in. It was an utter disaster. Ex's dad spent about 10 minutes waxing lyrical about how wonderful the groom's brother was, how he was so proud of their army boy, and how terrible it was he couldn't be here. Then he cried. He then spoke for a minute about the actual groom, basically giving a quick resume of past jobs. And that was it. A few members of my family had to leave the room they were so angry at the speech.

I have to say that I think leaving the room was a bit OTT.

Out,_Vile_Jelly

Hopefully you can find some stories that embarrass your mate but don't involve sexual encounters, or any members of the bridal party? It seems obvious, but clearly it needs pointing out.

Some of my mates have heard speeches that involved:

- confessions of accidentally poisoning the groom's pet during childhood which the speaker thought would be funny now so many years had passed.
- descriptions of the happy couple's rocky early days, resolved by the bride's "skillful playing of the skin flute".
- heckling from a family member released from prison the day before for manslaughter whilst drink driving.

So a slightly dull speech would be preferable to any of those!

You may be nervous, but remember the room is with you. Pause and take a deep breath if you feel panicked and garbled.

itsnotarace

The best mans speech I've always found is the one that is supposed to be light hearted and funny. The more sentimental speeches come from the groom and father of the bride etc

I've been best man before, and used a couple of jokes from the example speeches on the 'hitched' website as a jumping off point.
I needed a few generic ice breaker jokes and found a couple of decent ones there - that being said, if your looking at 20 speeches and 18 of them use the same joke then you can be sure that the audience have heard them all a bunch of times too.
Most of the speech should be funny, personal anecdotes etc about the groom.

Remember that although it can seem daunting trying to make people laugh, most people at a wedding want to laugh with you, so it's not as difficult as it seems beforehand - as long as you adhere to what others have said regarding nothing too offensive, no references to ex's, no in jokes etc

Oh and length - not too short and not too long.
I've been at one wedding where the best mans speech was literally:-
"Thanks for coming, I'm Grant's brother. I'll make this short - a toast to the bride and groom. Thank you."

But I've been to another wedding as an evening guest where we turned up at about 7pm and the speech's went on for so long that we were sat in the hotel bar until after 10pm waiting for people to finish their meals so the dancing could start....and the reception finished at 12."

thebigbosh

Was at a wedding earlier this year where the best man dive bombed, talking about acceptable middle class racism, fair bit of sexism too, how many dates the bride and groom had been on before they slept with each other, that time the groom got so drunk and sick, etc... Timing was off and he kept trying to tell jokes that weren't jokes and didn't have punch lines. Audience wasn't happy.

I've heard a funny story of how one best man distributed keys around some members of the audience (can't remember whether it was groom's side or bride's side) but started his speech with asking everyone that had a front door key to now return it. And through his speech, friends, members of the family, waiting staff etc. came up and put a key in the box. Could be quite amusing with the right kind of family/audience.

On my speeches, I like to work off a theme and keep bringing everyone back to it. Had a good one for our wedding on the theme of surprises and gelled a few warm personal stories with a few funny ones and a couple of jokes.

Lastly, most traditional weddings and speech structures call for the best man to laud the bridesmaids (I think) and compliment the bride's looks. Yawn! Be creative!

duchy

Don't get drunk until after your speech - no matter how nervous you are !!!

notanewuser

Went to a wedding a couple of years back. There were around 100 attendees. Speeches after meal, best man so nervous he didn't eat and just drank. After the 7 course meal I caught him adding to his speech with my 3 year old's crayon........

As written his speech would have been around 20 mins. He was so inebriated it took over an hour. Best bit was when he asked all of the buys that knew the groom from a particular teenage hobby to stand (they were scattered all over the room) and then informed everyone else of the girl that jumped from one to another during their teens (basically calling her a slapper). Bride saw red, threw a punch at the best man and left, refusing to return for several hours. Nobody could dance at the evening disco because the best man's wife had shut the doors to the bar so that she could tear him a new one.

Long as you avoid all of that you should be fine!

Gavin83

Out,_Vile_Jelly wrote: »

Hopefully you can find some stories that embarrass your mate but don't involve sexual encounters.

One of my 'stories' is about when the groom lost his virginity. It's the one thing I think might potentially be pushing the boundaries a little and I'm 50/50 if I should take it out or not.


I'm also planning on telling a story about when the groom !!!!ed himself when drunk and tried to pretend he split a drink. I'm happy I can get away with that one though.

itsnotarace wrote: »

no references to ex's

Do you think making a comment along the lines of her being the only one of his girlfriends I've ever gotten along with is acceptable? I'd kind of present it in a jokey way even though it's true.

Gavin83

duchy wrote: »

Don't get drunk until after your speech - no matter how nervous you are !!!

I'll likely drink a glass or 2 to settle the nerves somewhat but certainly not enough that I can't talk properly. The only issue is that this can sometimes be a fine line.