Feel so alone

Willowpop

Hi Popstess
It might be worth having a chat with your GP and see if he will sign you off for few days to have a rest.

You're doing the right thing, and you're doing it well and it is a roller coaster, that's for sure.
You know you can't carry on adding to your debt, thus the LBM...but it is hard to adjust to a new 'lifestyle'.
I found having physical envelopes for my money that month helped... I could actually see what money I hadn't spent and it gave me a real boost.
We are all here for you and all in the same boat, you're definitely not alone. X

pennystretcher

:grouphug:

chin up, you will get there! And hopefully over Xmas get some time to relax too and after a wee break feel better...

x

Popstess

I feel dreadful another sleepless night and I feel sick to my stomach with tiredness the thought of work fills me with dread feeling like this. It hasn't helped that I returned some clothes to the value of £200 and they've gone missing and like a complete idiot I can't find my proof of posting. I was counting on that money and now I've ended up in my overdraft the very thing I was trying to avoid so cross. I'm only in it by £89 and should hopefully be back out of it shortly it's just frustrating.
I know it's normal to have set backs and in going to have plenty on the way.
I will be more positive soon I promise I'm just really struggling at the minute :-( sorry

determined_new_ms

Hi Popstress just wanted to say it's ok to feel carp when things are carp, no need to always act *postiive* when you don't feel it. Have you looked everywhere for the receipt? Am hoping it turns up x

Popstess

Thank you I feel bad for being so negative I've looked everywhere I can think of and can't find it. I've emailed the company but no reply I know they're going to ask for proof of purchase. The most annoying thing is it was for a winter coat that I ordered months ago it took them ages to email me and say the one o wanted was out of stick but they could send me a different one but that would be extra money so I had to send them extra money and I didn't even really like the look of the replacement coat too short but instead of saying just cancel it I did as they asked and checked I could return it if I wasn't happy. It came and like i suspected was too short so I sent it back and that was 3 weeks ago and heard nothing. If I'd just says cancel it like my gut instinct said I wouldn't be in this situation

Penniesinmyjar

Hi Popstess,

I've just read your posts and I just wanted to send you a massive hug. I was in a similar position a year ago where I really did hit rock bottom and I felt so awful. I was spending to feel better and to 'prove' I had it together. I couldn't say no to anything, and my debt escalated to £24k. As a single parent that's a scary place to be.

I hit a point where I had nothing left, my bank had pulled my overdraft and my card was declined in the hairdressers. I had to face myself head on. So so so much money spent on new clothes, shoes, haircuts, holidays, going out, bags, accessories spent on to create a certain identity that I had decided was what I needed to feel good enough, to fit in, to feel secure, to be liked…. There’s no other way to describe my shopping sprees than to liken it to someone preparing for war! I feel insecure, it’s battle time – get the armor on and get into protect mode

I didn't mean to crash your diary, but I just wanted to share to let you know you're not alone and there is no shame. There is much to be proud of where you are right now, acknowledging and making steps for change. Even the small changes to start with are going to make big impact, even those car boots help get you in the right mind set that every penny helps!

I hope you get the returned clothes sorted, but if you don't - just breath, let it pass and chalk it up as one to learn from. We have all been there (well I definitely have!!).

Lots of luck xx

12_month_challenge

Popstess don't feel bad for feeling negative and no apologies needed. Just one of those down moments that will soon go away and you will be back on track

I am so sorry about your parcel :mad::mad:
Hopefully it will get sorted and you will get the money.
Like willowpop says could you ask your GP for a few days off? Even if its just to get your thoughts together and have a rest.

Its all sent to try us as the saying goes.

Keep your chin up :A

Popstess

Penniesinmyjar wrote: »

Hi Popstess,

I've just read your posts and I just wanted to send you a massive hug. I was in a similar position a year ago where I really did hit rock bottom and I felt so awful. I was spending to feel better and to 'prove' I had it together. I couldn't say no to anything, and my debt escalated to £24k. As a single parent that's a scary place to be.

I hit a point where I had nothing left, my bank had pulled my overdraft and my card was declined in the hairdressers. I had to face myself head on. So so so much money spent on new clothes, shoes, haircuts, holidays, going out, bags, accessories spent on to create a certain identity that I had decided was what I needed to feel good enough, to fit in, to feel secure, to be liked…. There’s no other way to describe my shopping sprees than to liken it to someone preparing for war! I feel insecure, it’s battle time – get the armor on and get into protect mode

I didn't mean to crash your diary, but I just wanted to share to let you know you're not alone and there is no shame. There is much to be proud of where you are right now, acknowledging and making steps for change. Even the small changes to start with are going to make big impact, even those car boots help get you in the right mind set that every penny helps!

I hope you get the returned clothes sorted, but if you don't - just breath, let it pass and chalk it up as one to learn from. We have all been there (well I definitely have!!).

Lots of luck xx

OMG I could have wrote this myself! The way you describe the reasons behind your spending is exactly what I was doing. I wouldn't of had a night out without buying something new every time! It was like every time I bought something or spent money one something it was going to be the answer!! Of course it never was the answers probably need to come from within me and can't be bought (getting all philosophical)
Well done on clearing 14000 in debt you have done amazing!!!! Right now getting out of nearly £30,000 debt deels impossible!!!

Popstess

12_month_challenge wrote: »

Popstess don't feel bad for feeling negative and no apologies needed. Just one of those down moments that will soon go away and you will be back on track

I am so sorry about your parcel :mad::mad:
Hopefully it will get sorted and you will get the money.
Like willowpop says could you ask your GP for a few days off? Even if its just to get your thoughts together and have a rest.

Its all sent to try us as the saying goes.

Keep your chin up :A

Thanks love, I seriously considered phoning in sick at work today after no sleep but I pushed myself to go and it was ok. The problem is if I have time off there will be even more to do when I go back to work so I'll probably end up more stressed. And I think I'd feel too guilty taking time off.

Popstess

I have good news! Just received an email about the coat I returned they have received it and are going to process my refund will take 2-5 days. Must have been all those positive MSE vibes you all sent out for me