Saturday/Sunday 12th/13th September - What small DFW things will you do this weekend?

Bobarella

YORKSHIRELASS wrote: »

Hi Bob, Yes we did it all and it was a mistake. Lesson learned. The meal out cost us £60 and the races £90. I really didnt think the trip to the races would cost us that much - OH and I were the only ones not drinking alcohol too. I didnt enjoy it because I was just worrying the whole time about how much we were spending. With the present on top my SILs birthday has cost us £190

One upside is that I was really proud of my OH. Everyone else was throwing money around on food, drinks and betting and he was drinking soft drinks and pretending he wasnt hungry.

I need to have a conversation with my kids about Christmas. DS1 was looking at things on the internet last night. This year is going to be far less extravagant. I am just working out some figures then I need to pick the right time to talk to the the kids.

This all sounds a bit depressing! Actually I feel OK about things like this now - it makes me realise how much money we used to waste.

Ah. Well. It's done and over now I suppose. These situations are always very tricky. Good on hubby for being restrained. Hope she (SIL) appreciated and enjoyed her day.

I suppose with your children looking now for items they want there is scope for you getting the best bargain. And putting some ground rules in place on expectations.

CCL - hope your day isn't too crazy with the traffic from tutoring.

YORKSHIRELASS

crazy_cat_lady wrote: »

You know one thing I noticed about Christmas once I was actually skint Yorkshirelass? Just how much stuff is wasted.

You know this is so true. One of the things I have been doing as part of changing my life is decluttering my house - massively. I have become a huge Kon-Mari fan. Its all about appreciating the stuff that you already have and not buying things just for the sake of it.

I can remember last Christmas finding it quite hard to find things to buy the kids and buying them stupid things just so that they had lots to open.

And dnm good to know your story too. My kids are 14 and 16 and the 14 yo has become very materialistic lately. Everything has to be branded and top of the range. He is the one that will take this the hardest I think. But there are ways around this, we have a big family and they usually buy lots of things that are really not wanted or needed so I have time to get some lists around.

foxgloves

Afternoon all,
Nice lazy start to the morning as mr f made breakfast & I had an hour reading the 'Observer' before getting my backside into gear. I have to go away for a few days so have mostly been preparing for that, but have done a few money saving bits too:
*Picked runner beans. Enough for dinner today & to freeze another bag.
*Did laundry overnight on cheap tariff, all drying outside on the line as it's a nice warm day.
*Packed 2 knitting projects to take away with me - both are items I'm knitting for Christmas presents, so will try to crack on with those as much as possible.
*Handwashed pet bedding & hung out on the line to drip-dry.
*Ironed charity shop top I bought while on holiday. Tried it on. Looks nice with jeans - quite glam in a casual sort of way (£2.80)
That's it, really for today. I'm planning on a major pampering session this afternoon & will be incorporating a lot of 'use-it-up' as I seem to have rather a lot of products on the go at the moment.
Hope to hear there's been lots of positive money saving/debt-busting news when I return. Am unable to say quite when that will be, but am not intending to launch into a spend-fest, even if I'm feeling stressed!
f x

foxgloves

Interesting thoughts on Christmas presents. My twopennorth for what it's worth is that whether you celebrate Christmas as a Christian festival, the older pagan Yuletide or just a nice opportunity for a family get together & time off work, it ISN'T about spending obscene amounts of money. I used to overspend terribly on gifts every year at Christmas pre-LBM, & I don't even have any children to use as an 'excuse' for silly spending. I still remember how worried I used to be as the end of January loomed each year, as I'd be in even more debt than usual, & February was usually even worse!
I think I posted this a while back, but years ago, I knew someone who as a result of financial difficulties, launched a new approach to family presents. They all agreed on a small very specific sum of money each year, say £3.47 or £5.11 & the idea was to spend only that amount on each other. It apparently got quite competitive & was a lot of fun adding funny little bits to make up the spend to the agreed amount. I understand that it was ok to sellotape a 2p (or whatever) to the gift in order to get it to the right amount, but that you absolutely were not allowed to spend more. I always thought that sounded like fun.
My nephews really love Christmas & being human, of course part of that is receiving presents, but the sheer amount they received particularly as toddlers was just eye-watering. I think there actually is a limit to how much stuff kids can physically play with. Of course they love their presents, but I think the thing they seem to enjoy most over the festive period is having people around to play games with. Last year, we played board games, charades, card games, shared silly magic tricks etc, even played pass the parcel with ridiculous forfeits, & they loved it. That's the stuff they will ultimately remember. A lot of stuff on kids' Christmas present wishlists, esp. at the action figure/film merchandise end of things, have a pretty limited shelf-life.
f x

DawnW

YORKSHIRELASS wrote: »

Hi Bob, Yes we did it all and it was a mistake. Lesson learned. The meal out cost us £60 and the races £90. I really didnt think the trip to the races would cost us that much - OH and I were the only ones not drinking alcohol too. I didnt enjoy it because I was just worrying the whole time about how much we were spending. With the present on top my SILs birthday has cost us £190

One upside is that I was really proud of my OH. Everyone else was throwing money around on food, drinks and betting and he was drinking soft drinks and pretending he wasnt hungry.

IMHO it is quite rude for people to expect others to pay out a lot of money to celebrate THEIR birthday (or wedding, hen do or whatever it is). I am sure their families and friends are very happy for them, but not THAT happy, especially if they are struggling for money! If someone is expecting others to join in one of these extravagant bonanzas, then they should jolly well pay for it all themselves :mad:

Honestly Yorkshire Lass, I would politely decline if it happens again - as you say, you didn't enjoy it because you were worried about the cost, and if they don't like it, well it is too bad! Once upon a time I would have got bull dozed into this kind of thing, but no longer

Foxgloves - hope you don't get too stressed and whatever it is goes as well as can be expected

Haven't managed to do anything much this weekend, as I have grand children staying and they are hard work to say the least - but I have had a quick read while they are playing quietly upstairs. I am not sure what they are doing, but no doubt I can clean it up afterwards, and at least I have 5 minutes peace :rotfl:

Bobarella

Few other bits. Have now caught up on my wombled reciept backlog. .took final 1 to Mr S today and final 2 to Mr T. Have uploaded any real ones to the shopping apps too.

Made a cake using up 2 nectarines rejected by the family in their native state. And the rind from a floppy lemon. Just about to ice it.

I totally agree on the less is more approach to xmas. We started Christmas treasure maps when our son was 3 and he has to find his gifts. We only give him 1 big present and a few smaller ones so it adds to the suspense and keeps him happy for a bit whilst he did them

Bob

determined_new_ms

Bobarella wrote: »

I totally agree on the less is more approach to xmas. We started Christmas treasure maps when our son was 3 and he has to find his gifts. We only give him 1 big present and a few smaller ones so it adds to the suspense and keeps him happy for a bit whilst he did them

Bob

This is such a cute idea! I am totally going to steal it - if I can remember next year!

OMG I am so angry & upset :mad: (doesn't take much at the moment )

I gave my dd a phone about a month ago as hers was broken. Today she has contacted me demanding details about my mother's estate. She has hacked into my email account and is demanding I give her money. The simple fact is I was planning on setting some aside for both my children to help them get a flat or something once they have sorted their lives out and when I know it won't be money down the drain.

I can't believe she thinks this is acceptable. I'm so mad I could cry x

Bobarella

Determined - what made her hack in the first place instead of simply talking to you?

determined_new_ms

She's just opened my email account attached to the app on phone and then has read through the emails

There has always been boundary issues, part of her illness means she thinks she has a right to know everything about me, have anything that is mine

Bobarella

Oh I see now how she could do it. Technically speaking.

It must be so hard trying to seperate that sort of behaviour from her condition if that sounds right.