Sponsorship and blackmail

onlyroz

Are you just disinterested in the charity? If that's the case then I'd sponsor her the minimum amount you can without raising eyebrows.

Or perhaps it is a charity that you actively have issues with, maybe because you are morally against the cause or you think the charity is managed unethically? If this is the case then you should politely refuse but give reasons. You could perhaps offer to give an equivalent amount to a different charity.

Lily-Rose_3

Quizzical_Squirrel wrote: »

As mentioned above, it depends whether you have an issue with this particular charity or whether you just don't care about it.

If you have a serious concern then I think it's ok to tell your sister no, providing a reason.

If you're just not interested then bear in mind that charity is not always as entirely selfless as it appears.
When you learn someone supports a medical disorder charity, for example, it is inevitably because someone close to them has been affected by the illness. Before that, they didn't give a rats ars3 about it.

Charity is as much about the giver as the receiver. People don't care until mum's snuffed it or their youngest is afflicted. Then suddenly, they're proud to support the cause ... because it makes them feel better.

True charity is giving when it's not all about you.

Ha ha, I could have written this QS. I feel exactly the same actually.

It really grinds on my norks when people suddenly start obsessing about a cause or a charity when they didn't give a flying fudge about it before, and it's even worse when they expect everyone else to care too!

Yes, to a certain extent, you can understand people having a vested interest in a cause that has affected them, but it is quite annoying when they are rabid about it, when they had no interest AT ALL before.

I know several people who have had no interest in certain medical conditions, until their children were diagnosed with it, (or sometimes another close family member,) and now every other facebook post is about it. And they put things like 'share this if you care about children with *insert name of condition here*' And they say things like 'if you have a heart you will share this' kind of nonsense!

As I said, what is even more annoying, is how they assume everyone else is going to care passionately about it too, and when other people don't, they get all huffy!

I know someone whose wife was diagnosed with a certain condition, and 4 out of 5 facebook posts and twitter posts he puts now, are about this condition. In addition, he keeps doing things for 'charideee' to raise money for this condition. He is 45, and up to the year before last, he never gave a damn about anyone suffering from this condition.

Annoys the heck out of me tbh!

System

I took part in a big charity event last year - I've supported the charity since 2009 as I think they do good work although I haven't been affected by the condition myself. My OH wouldn't sponsor me as he has his own 'pet' charities. Fine by me, it's his money and up to him what he does with it.
However he was really supportive of my training, joined in, planned, encouraged me - very useful, and the event would have been much harder without him backing me up.
Could you do something similar for your sister? Give her your time and support instead of money?

onlyroz

Lily-Rose wrote: »

It really grinds on my norks when people suddenly start obsessing about a cause or a charity when they didn't give a flying fudge about it before, and it's even worse when they expect everyone else to care too

It is understandable to take a greater interest in a charity that has affected you personally. It doesn't necessarily mean that you didn't "give a flying fudge" before - just that you didn't know anything about it.

Person_one

Lily-Rose wrote: »

Ha ha, I could have written this QS. I feel exactly the same actually.

It really grinds on my norks when people suddenly start obsessing about a cause or a charity when they didn't give a flying fudge about it before, and it's even worse when they expect everyone else to care too!

Yes, to a certain extent, you can understand people having a vested interest in a cause that has affected them, but it is quite annoying when they are rabid about it, when they had no interest AT ALL before.

I know several people who have had no interest in certain medical conditions, until their children were diagnosed with it, (or sometimes another close family member,) and now every other facebook post is about it. And they put things like 'share this if you care about children with *insert name of condition here*' And they say things like 'if you have a heart you will share this' kind of nonsense!

As I said, what is even more annoying, is how they assume everyone else is going to care passionately about it too, and when other people don't, they get all huffy!

I know someone whose wife was diagnosed with a certain condition, and 4 out of 5 facebook posts and twitter posts he puts now, are about this condition. In addition, he keeps doing things for 'charideee' to raise money for this condition. He is 45, and up to the year before last, he never gave a damn about anyone suffering from this condition.

Annoys the heck out of me tbh!

Its human nature, you'll spend your life irrationally angry if you let it get to you this much!

Of course people tend to get more involved with and feel more strongly about causes that have affected the people they love. That strength of feeling dissipates with distance, a bereaved parent might devote the rest of their life to fundraising for the disease that killed their child while their auntie's second cousin's hairdresser's niece might make one donation to their just giving page but volunteer every weekend for a food bank after having to use one at a desperate time. And so it goes...

I prefer to think a bit more positively about people in general, and that this is the way things are because it the only way it would ever work. Its impossible for every person to care equally and give equal time and money to every cause but lots of people make an effort to do some small amount of good in the world, and that can only be a good thing!


(Of course, there are also lots of people who care about causes that have never affected them. Not ever Samaritan has lost someone to suicide, not everybody helping at a soup kitchen has been homeless, plenty of people donate to things like comic relief with no connection to Africa, and just look at some of the amazing responses to the refugee crisis for an example of people wanting to help with no personal connection.)

Lily-Rose_3

Person_one wrote: »

Its human nature, you'll spend your life irrationally angry if you let it get to you this much!

Of course people tend to get more involved with and feel more strongly about causes that have affected the people they love. That strength of feeling dissipates with distance, a bereaved parent might devote the rest of their life to fundraising for the disease that killed their child while their auntie's second cousin's hairdresser's niece might make one donation to their just giving page but volunteer every weekend for a food bank after having to use one at a desperate time. And so it goes...

I prefer to think a bit more positively about people in general, and that this is the way things are because it the only way it would ever work. Its impossible for every person to care equally and give equal time and money to every cause but lots of people make an effort to do some small amount of good in the world, and that can only be a good thing!

(Of course, there are also lots of people who care about causes that have never affected them. Not ever Samaritan has lost someone to suicide, not everybody helping at a soup kitchen has been homeless, plenty of people donate to things like comic relief with no connection to Africa, and just look at some of the amazing responses to the refugee crisis for an example of people wanting to help with no personal connection.)

I am not letting anything get to me FGS; I am just contributing to the conversation. And why are you singling me out?! :huh:

What's more, I really don't need you telling me how to think or act thank you very much!

I stand by everything I said, that is my opinion, and if you see things differently, then that's your call. What you think and say is not gonna change MY views!

As you were.

Lily-Rose_3

onlyroz wrote: »

It is understandable to take a greater interest in a charity that has affected you personally. It doesn't necessarily mean that you didn't "give a flying fudge" before - just that you didn't know anything about it.

So what? I am still entitled to get narked off by it.

And as I said, it is particularly annoying when people think everyone ELSE should be crazy about the cause too, and get all huffy if people aren't bothered.

Again, why single ME out when I am not the only one who mentioned this?

Person_one

Lily-Rose wrote: »

I am not letting anything get to me FGS;

Really? :cool:

This is a discussion forum, that's why I'm responding to people's opinions on the topic with my own opinions and engaging in a discussion.

Amber_Sunshine

Nobody is obliged to support someone else's fundraising efforts.

It's sponsorship, not extortion or taxation.

FBaby

That whole sponsorship for a sporting event is really doing my head in. People think they are special by doing some sort of event that many other people do and as such think it is their right to be given money for the achievement. There is a lot of pressure to do so and not doing it automatically seem to label you as a stingy and uncaring. The reality is that if you are friends with people who share an interest in sporting events, you can end up sponsoring someone almost every week-end, for a charity you might have no interest in at all.

I do a number of events and yes, they all expect you to raise funds. That's fine, I normally just put in what I think I could have raised reasonably. I much rather support fundraising that way than go and pester and pressure people to give money to make me look good.