Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 2

Wellyboots6

Hoover has died. Mini-meltdown over the state of the floors. Bearded one has ordered a superdoopercoardlessjobby to cheer me up. Not sure we can afford it though!

Missed playgroup today as I have a stinking cold. Would set up Escapettes toys on the floor to do an at home playgroup so she doesn't miss out, but with no hoover and Little Sod moulting she would end up looking like a wookie.

Hope you are OK WaS

Is today the day I weigh myself so I can join in Wednesdays? I've been a lot of long walks this week so feel better, but with not knowing my weight before I started walking I don't want to find I'm a lot heavier than I thought and it put me off.

onomatopoeia99

I agree with you tea. I won't tell lies (both in principle and because I'd never remember them so would be found out). Being greeted with stomping about because I've forgotten to do something does get wearing though and left me on edge all the time, so the temptation was very strong.

What I used to do for an easy life was go along with stuff she wanted even when I wasn't that happy about it, rather than refuse and risk a meltdown. I'm easygoing about most things anyway, but eventually she realised "easygoing" was not the same as "being a pushover" and looking back that was the turning point.

Georgiegirl256

Izadora wrote: »

I'm having the kind of morning where I'm very surprised I haven't fallen headfirst into a pile of chocolate. OH has previously had a bad habit of lying about fairly insignificant things (he figures it's easier than dealing with a telling off) but had promised to be honest, even if the truth was going to annoy / hurt me. He's in the process of giving up smoking and a few times I've found fag papers lying around the flat, which he's said have fallen out of pockets. To be fair, he does have papers in pretty much every one of the many, many jackets he owns but I found a cigarette butt by the front door this morning which was clearly one of his. He admits to having one last night and one Wednesday night but I'm now spinning myself out, wondering how often 'it fell out of a pocket' was a lie, what else he might have lied about and whether we're completely f!!!ed if I can't trust him over even the simplest thing. I'm absolutely fuming with him and trying very hard not to dissolve into tears at my desk. It's going to be a long day...
Sorry, /self-pitying rant.

From an outsiders view, it seems a big jump from lying about a few fag papers to lying about bigger things. Just my opinion on it. Maybe being an ex smoker myself, I can relate to the lying about quitting. Not that I did it all the time, but I didn't want to admit to D that I was still having a crafty one here and there (although he'll have smelt it off my clothes, and he's not daft!) as I didn't want to feel like a failure, I didn't want to admit that I couldn't do it either to him or myself. I've been quit for about 6 years now and did it the cold turkey method too.

I think a lot of small white lies are envitable and mainly down to embarrassment at being caught out or stubbornness to admit they're wrong. Admittedly sometimes it can mean more than that though and problems can run deeper, and I can see how annoying/upsetting it would be if it was continuous, and how it would wear you down.

If it's just little insignificant things, whilst annoying, it's understandable, sometimes anything for an easy life! Especially if they know they're going to get nagged/shouted. Not saying you do that of course, I just mean in general.

Regarding being honest if I ask a question on how I look, I'd rather someone be honest. If I'm wearing something that just does not suit me/looks daft/have put on weight etc then I'd rather I was told. Luckily D feels the same. We've always been like that, and I can't see the point in lying to spare the others feelings and give false hope if I'm asked a direct question. I'd never just come out and say things though, only if I'm asked, I'm not going to lie. I can totally understand how galling it must be though if the weight gain etc is not your fault and is down to medication etc.

Smaller lies like who ate the last cadburys cream egg etc I can live with, but it's when they develop into bigger ones that the problems start.

Wow, that turned into an essay!

Pyxis

Sorry I haven't caught up with the thread, but hugs to anyone needing one.


Here is a monkey grooming his rapturously relaxed brother! .....







I saw Dolphins!

And joy of joys, a Blue Whale! Whoopee!
Last night tonight.......we're giving ourselves a concert of party pieces plus all the songs we've learned on this hol!!

tea_lover

It is really interesting seeing the different views on lying. Rationally, I can see the merit in everything ono and georgie have just posted, I really can.

But - I just can't see it that way myself. For me, there's no difference between "I won't admit to eating the last crème egg because it'll end up in an argument" and "I won't admit I slept with my ex because it'll end up in an argument".

The feeling that someone else is deciding what you do or don't get to find out, based on how easy it makes their life is a horrible one. My opinion is, if you respect someone you tell them the truth - regardless of whether that gets you into trouble. If you don't want an argument, don't do the thing that would cause an argument - don't just do it then lie about it.

I can fully see that my viewpoint possibly isn't the most rational! And, as I said, I do find the discussions really interesting. Am now worried that I'm offending people by talking about this!

Izadora

Ahhh, Pyxis, I love monkeys!!

And thank you everyone. It's really good to see things from a different point of view as well as knowing that I'm not the only person who has an issue with little white lies and has calmed me down a lot.

If OH had any idea that this thread existed he'd probably thank you too as I'm likely to be much more pleasant when I get home than I would've been if I hadn't been able to get it off my chest

codemonkey

You're not offending me tea. Its interesting how people have different perspectives on these things. You and I should probably never get married though :rotfl:

A typical conversation in my house goes something like this:
Me: Oi, did you have the last creme egg?
Mr CP in a guilty voice:.....Noooooo
Me: Well I didn't and they're all gone.
Mr CP: Well a racoon came and I told him not to eat it because you wanted it but he said eff you!
Me: Pffft. Guess I'll have a caramel instead.

In other news I am sick and so wearing a hazmat suit in the fort. I got sent home from work yesterday (largely because my coughing was driving everyone crazy and now I am under a pile of blankets trying to get warm, using a forest of tissues and trying not to throw my back out when I cough as I hurt that too. Could someone bring me soup please? Not going to get my bounts today as only done 840 steps.

codemonkey

Also pyxis thanks for the photos, particularly the hefalumps. I love elephants but for some reason whenever I see them, I feel sad.

tea_lover

*rethinks the valentine's day proposal to code*

tea_lover

codemonkey wrote: »

A typical conversation in my house goes something like this:
Me: Oi, did you have the last creme egg?
Mr CP in a guilty voice:.....Noooooo
Me: Well I didn't and they're all gone.
Mr CP: Well a racoon came and I told him not to eat it because you wanted it but he said eff you!
Me: Pffft. Guess I'll have a caramel instead.

Also (I'm on a roll now, I'll shut up in a minute I promise :rotfl:) .... for me there's a big difference between this kind of scenario and the cold ability to look someone in the face and lie to them.

Clearly I have some major trust issues!