Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 2

mellymoo74

WaS not your fault

Less than an hours sleep
Tired

Waves_and_Smiles

I did a take a course of vitamin D tablets last year, Pyxis but I don't right now. I should make a point of getting my levels checked again, thank you for the reminder!

The next stage if the sleep study is for the professor to meet me, elsien. All treatment is off right now because I cannot do it while psychotic, psychosis is linked very much to sleep so now isn't the time for it to be restricted unfortunately.

I didn't actually think of posting because it might be interesting for people thank you whitewing that actually makes me feel better about it!.I will try to keep recording but please forgive me if I seem weird or paranoid! I am probably going to be way too detailed about things so forgive long posts, my thoughts are very scattered so I feel like I have to explain everything to make sense to others.

Emotionally I am not too bad but the visual hallucinations I don't like one bit. I saw a spider as large as my hand with a bright blue back crawling up the wall. I knew it couldn't be real so I closed my eye's tightly and thought it's just an hallucination so go away. I opened my eyes and it was higher up the wall. I tried closing them again and next time it was on the ceiling. Exactly like the voices it is apparent that whether I believe things are real or not my brain will continue to produce the hallucination.

Since then I have had lightening in varying colours (think fireworks) and a woman sitting on the bed in perfect 1940's dress. Also a very odd time when I felt the room was shaking and could see everything moving back and forth. My psychiatrist isn't alarmed at all and just said it's just the same as auditory hallucinations, just a different sense affected. It's still freaking me out! The oddest thing like the spider is that if something is moving and I close my eyes my brain compensates as if the hallucination is actually moving while I can't see it and adjusts its position when I reopen them, if I wasn't wrecked I'd be fascinated because they are very, very lifelike. Believe me, when people say they think hallucinations are real it's because they seem like it completely, even movement and shadows are the same. Don't worry about asking me anything about it, it is interesting and an almost new experience for me, I only had visual hallucinations during my first psychotic break over 20 years ago so I am learning too. So far the hallucinations are silent, if they start making noises and talking too I really will panic!

One thing I forget about Schizophrenia is that it changes, this can take years but there is no guarantee that symptoms will stay the same for a lifetime. I went through a very active phase at first that was mostly emotional instability with ridiculous paranoia and thoughts of conspiracies, then I went into a negative phase where all of my emotions just stopped for 2 years and I felt nothing, after that followed years of auditory hallucinations and now it seems it's visual time. It is all psychosis, just showing itself in different ways. My auditory hallucinations aren't as bad this time and the voices are just a mumble, I just have electric blue spiders crawling up the wall instead!

I want a baby haggis!

heartbreak_star

Very quick one before I start playing catch-up - cheer dad signed the form and his daughter competed! YAY!!

They won seven trophies this weekend and I'm a very tired, proud any rather poorly coach!

HBS x

onomatopoeia99

whitewing wrote: »

ono, are you on POF yet? )

I made the account but failed at the writing a profile stage

tea_lover

I can safely say it's full of weirdos and you're not missing anything ono.

Well done HBS, that's fantastic!!

Have just found out that my dad has also had several phone calls from FOH's mum (some weeks ago). He only thought to tell me this after he and my mum had been at the police station for 2hrs this morning giving statements. I despair.

whitewing

Look on the bright side, tea, at least police baby will have impressed upon them the need for logging it.

In the same way that FOH is not your responsibility, neither are your parents' actions your responsibility. Yes, it helps if they do what they are supposed to when they are supposed to, but you don't need to worry yourself being the sole gatherer of evidence.

This thread is full of weirdos, tea (not meaning to offend anyone but probably offending everyone). Ono, write a profile or we will write one for you! I am sure there will be enough on the thread to cobble one together. Get yourself a date for Valentine's. This is friendly banter, so don't feel under pressure.

Torry_Quine

Pyxis wrote: »

Happy Burns' Night day to all our Scottish Lights!

(what does laldy mean?)



I want haggis the noo!

it means to give your all to what you are doing.

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Happy Burns Night code, and do we have any other Scots?

Our supermarkets have been full of stuff to celebrate Burns Night, and I fancy trying a haggis again! I had one years ago when I visited a penpal in Aberdeen and really enjoy it.

Tea, you haven't spilt a coffee or anything in your car have you or had some milk spill? I remember I had a bottle of milk that leaked out once, the car stunk to high heavens for ages afterwards.

Not only am I Scots but in Aberdeen! Hence my name.

Pyxis wrote: »

A baby wild haggis!

Sweeeeeeeee!

Remember that a haggis has one leg shorter than the other for running round hills.:rotfl:

calleyw

back again LOL!!!

Bought new taps they where cheaper than the ones they are going to replace.

Spent a total of nearly £40 this morning but will be getting a £22.99 refund in due course for the old taps.

Not sure why but today have started to wear ankle weights. Wore them out yes I did have trousers on :rotfl:

Hope it helps in some way LOL!!!

Talking to a few blokes at the moment on Badoo and POF. Lets see where it goes shall we!!!

Oh if you want grown up colouring books they have some in poundworld. A couple of different ones. I need to get mine out again now I have my office.

Had cold apple crumble and turkish style yoghurt OMG how lush was that. I have to admit JM is spot on when they to use it instead of cream.

Yours

Calley

Pyxis

I had haggis for lunch! Yum!

It's all right, WaS, it wasn't a baby one, it was very old and died of natural causes.
And it wasn't your fault it died.

I thanked it for giving me sustenance before I ate it, like the Native Americans used to do., and so honoured its life.

And it was yum! :):)
I gave it laldy! :rotfl:

'Ere Whitewing, 'oo you callin' a weirdo? :mad:

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: Actually, I don't mind being weird! Weird is interesting! :rotfl:


WaS, the spider hallucinations, and any others..... I'm assuming they don't scare you. Can you treat them as you would a normal 'spider', ie a free pet, that's on the wall now, but probably won't be in an hour's time.
Or is it better to try to block it for fear of being sucked into a virtual world?

onomatopoeia99

tea_lover wrote: »

I can safely say it's full of weirdos and you're not missing anything ono.

I'm not sure whether this makes me feel better or worse! Anyway, I'm weird, but hopefully not a weirdo :eek:.


I missed it on the telly yesterday, but have got the page on amazon with the Labyrinth blu ray open and hovering over the buy button . I love Frozen too, but if I want to watch that I'll borrow it from my 3 year old niece :rotfl: