The Ashley Madison Hack

fairy_lights

gabriel1980 wrote: »

There's usually a reason for an affair to be conducted. Unhappiness, being treated badly, or not noticed anymore. If your self-worth, confidence and self-esteem are suffering then I think having an affair with someone who does desire you is not as awful as it seems.

If you're being treated badly or are unhappy then do everyone a favour and get a divorce, or at the very least talk to your partner about what you're feeling. Cheating won't fix what's already broken, and might break something that's not.

Fireflyaway

gabriel1980 - that's in interesting point. I have heard of people who go out with or even sleep with other people because they have a partner who is in a home / very ill or disabled etc. They still love their partner but crave the affection / sex.

In general I don't think that represents the majority of cheaters. As others have said its not just the partner that gets hurt in an affair but kids, in laws, parents etc etc. The impact of an affair can damage someone for a long long time afterwards.

makeitstop

gabriel1980 wrote: »

There's usually a reason for an affair to be conducted. Unhappiness, being treated badly, or not noticed anymore. If your self-worth, confidence and self-esteem are suffering then I think having an affair with someone who does desire you is not as awful as it seems.


Say your spouse found out and realised, hold on, I'm angry and upset, but my partner is desirable, why don't I find him desirable anymore? Maybe they still do, but have forgotten to show you.


Maybe you're trapped in a relationship through financial issues or even abuse, an affair could be a means out. Just don't be so quick to judge people who have affairs. There's sometimes more than the expected reason.

Can't quite decide whether this is a troll job or not.

If not, then there's not a lot of point in anyone rational responding.

gabriel1980

Fireflyaway wrote: »

gabriel1980 - that's in interesting point. I have heard of people who go out with or even sleep with other people because they have a partner who is in a home / very ill or disabled etc. They still love their partner but crave the affection / sex.

In general I don't think that represents the majority of cheaters. As others have said its not just the partner that gets hurt in an affair but kids, in laws, parents etc etc. The impact of an affair can damage someone for a long long time afterwards.

This leads me to my next point. What if there are not kids? No marriage? Just a relationship which you're unhappy in and it's just not easy to leave.

gabriel1980

PeacefulWaters wrote: »

Still doesn't justify betrayal though.

I think being treated badly, does justify betrayal. A lot of things justify betrayal not least being betrayed yourself.

thorsoak

So, we ought to feel sorry for people who have registered on a website that they wish to have clandestine affairs?

I was always brought up to to believe that if you play with fire, you stand a risk of getting burned.

I'm not wasting any sympathy on would-be cheaters.

ognum

gabriel1980 wrote: »

I think being treated badly, does justify betrayal. A lot of things justify betrayal not least being betrayed yourself.

So referring back to an earlier thread of your regarding your partners need not to be seen nude would that be justification for you to have an affair?

Is this what this is about?

ognum

gabriel1980 wrote: »

This leads me to my next point. What if there are not kids? No marriage? Just a relationship which you're unhappy in and it's just not easy to leave.

Either work it out or leave, why is it easier to have an afair that just complicates things more. I just don't see how it makes the situation better.

gabriel1980

ognum wrote: »

So referring back to an earlier thread of your regarding your partners need not to be seen nude would that be justification for you to have an affair?

Is this what this is about?

I have never said or indicated that I would have an affair. And it seems an unnerving trend is this forum that other threads are always brought into different topics. One thread has nothing to do with the other.

ognum

gabriel1980 wrote: »

I have never said or indicated that I would have an affair. And it seems an unnerving trend is this forum that other threads are always brought into different topics. One thread has nothing to do with the other.

OF course it does, your thought and opinions are yours and follow you through out your threads unless you are a TROLL