Why do people think less of a couple who aren't married?

bugslet

j.e.j. wrote: »

Marriage shows commitment, and it also gives you legal protection.

You can be in a "serious relationship" (whatever that means), without being married, but it's not the same.

The late Mr Bugs was with his first wife for about 5 years and the second for 8 years. We managed 28 years. I know which relationship showed the most commitment;)

missbiggles1

bugslet wrote: »

The late Mr Bugs was with his first wife for about 5 years and the second for 8 years. We managed 28 years. I know which relationship showed the most commitment;)

But is commitment only measured in time together?

If you and Mr Bugs had only been together for 4 years when he died, would that have made your commitment less than that in his two marriages?

I don't think that relationships are that simple, I'm afraid.:)

Buzzybee90

Is it really time for the piece of paper vs. marriage is amazing argument again, already?

fairy_lights

duchy wrote: »

As for the last paragraph - What on earth are you on about ? If you'd never call your partner your husband (and how would I know what you call him anyway?) then why would you think I was referring to you? It was clear I was talking about people who DO call their partnerss husband or wife. This thread is about views about marriage in general and not just about you and what you do. Defensive or what !!!

I wasn't being defensive, but you replied to my post and then started talking about people calling their unmarried partners husbands/wives and it wasn't clear if you were still replying to me - I though OH might have another meaning like 'One's husband' that I didn't know about

bugslet

missbiggles1 wrote: »

But is commitment only measured in time together?

If you and Mr Bugs had only been together for 4 years when he died, would that have made your commitment less than that in his two marriages?

I don't think that relationships are that simple, I'm afraid.:)

And I don't disagree with you, but I was replying to jej that said marriage shows commitment. I didn't not marry him for lack of commitment, just that I never got the point of it having made certain legal provisions.

i do like a good wedding, just not mine:D

geerex

In football terms, marriage is like the premier league, just living together is like the championship. In the premier league, things cost more, the players involved are generally stroppier and the transfer fees are huge!

Buzzybee90

geerex wrote: »

In football terms, marriage is like the premier league, just living together is like the championship. In the premier league, things cost more, the players involved are generally stroppier and the transfer fees are huge!

The championship is the most exciting league.

Georgiegirl256

Slinky wrote: »

There is no such status in legal terms as 'common law spouse'. It's a unfortunate term that people think will protect them and will not.

Yes I know, we've been over that already.

onlyroz

I've checked my company's compassionate leave policy and it just says "Family members will include parent, partner, child,sibling, parent-in-law or grandparent."

Georgiegirl256

duchy wrote: »

What really bugs me is people who refer to their partner as their husband or wife when they aren't. If you don't want marriage fine ....but if you don't- why do you want the title ?

I can never understand that either. :huh: Out of all the names you could use to describe them husband or wife are ones that just would not enter my mind if I was unmarried, simply because they are not. To me, people who use that term are secretly wishing that they were married, otherwise why not just call them OH or partner? It just causes confusion.