'The 'Anyone For Tennis' July NSD Gang Go Camping on Wimbledon Common Challenge'

marmiterulesok

Oh no,the voles in Helga's beard are getting restless.
Quick! More hair lacquer over here please before they run amok!
Cheffie has a deep seated terror of the wee beasts and might do something silly or dangerous if he sees them!

Nargleblast

Ah, who's that coming up the drive? Some chap with a letter for Igor, and one addressed to you, marmite...that's Tatty' s handwriting, go on open it, what's it say? Better hang on to Igor's letter till we know what yours says...

marmiterulesok

My hands are shaking too much.You open it.......

Nargleblast

Dear marmite.....blah blah...tell Igor...sorry and all that...ginger chest wig.....sprout curry.....

Oh dear. Oh dear.

Nargleblast

It seems our blushing bride has eloped with Bert Scroggins, taking Igor's chest wig and his emergency chamber pot supply of sprout curry with her.

The Wedding is off.

Shall you tell Igor or shall I?

Nargleblast

Damn! And he was so fond of that chest wig.

marmiterulesok

marmite rips open her envelope with authority...

She reads: 'Es good man,Igorchik,leetle one,but I found reel man.Es good and andsome too.Hes name Berti Scrokins,luver boy.Igorchik leetle and not hafe own teeth.
Be good to im.He love you too.You know you want him.I see the way you luk at im.Be happy Igorchik and marmichik.Mwah.Tattyana xxx

marmite turns a strange colour and has to be revived with more gin.

marmiterulesok

What a damned cheek!
Trying to fix him up with someone else just to ease her conscience! :mad:

marmiterulesok

A few slugs of gin and a nice cup of tea later (thanks Mrs Doyle) and marmite is looking less peaky.

She takes stock of the situation and her gaze drifts over to the jilted,hunched figure that is Igorchik.
She manages shakily to get to her feet,sighs deeply and suddenly does a runner for the door.Like a bullet she speeds away before anyone can react.

'Blimey' she thinks as she speeds along,faster than Paula Radcliffe on a good day,'that was close!'.

fedupandskint

Another NSD today after a big clear up outside at long last!

NSD 15