please help, feeling broody....

ooobedoo

I have dd 8 months and ds 5yrs, am feeling so broody, can people please put me off, or just tell me all the things I won't be able to do in a family of 5. It's really bad. I had 2 c-sections and the dr said it might be a good idea not to have any more as dd was 11lbs 1oz but I have this feeling in my chest, dd is such an easy baby, and when she was born the love I felt was like being hit like a brick, unlike ds who grew on me like ivy, love them both the same

bluebell13

I'm not much help. DS is 5 and DD is 2 and a half, and I'm feeling broody on and off although I know we can't afford any more and I'm 38 now. I'll await other peoples replies too!!!

doraexplorer

i also have 2 kids ds age 7 and dd age 2. people always think because we were blessed with one of each that we are complete. this is annoying !

i too sometimes get broody but i struggle with 2 kids work and housework. if we had more i would have to give up work. my work keeps me sane.

trying to think of practical reasons not to have member number 5 in my family ...

yogurts are in a pack of 4 , 2 each for the kids
everything is in 2 or 4 packs such as sausage rolls, pies,
baked potatoes are in a pack of 4
even dinner sets are in packs of 4 (sometimes 6)
using the car i dont think i would get 2 cars seats and a booster seat in my car
i only have 4 chairs at my dining table.
i have a 3 bedroom it would mean 2 of the kids sharing a room
less change of nana taking the kids over night
family passes for some places state 2 adults and 2 children , would have to buy a extra ticket
games are normally for 4 players ludo etc

there are proberly more but i cant think as for the waking nights and nappy changes and all the tiredness with pregnancy and looking after the other children , that does not put me off at all. i did not mind it with the other 2 and my 2 year old daughter has only started sleeping all night in the last few months.

this is proberly not much use but its a start.

excuse the spelling had a long day with the kids and just poured a glass of wine and MSE dont have a spell checker

madhouseof4

I am going to be of no help whatsoever as I too am broody as hell! I have 2 ds's aged 6 and 3. Ds2 was a very difficult baby and has numerous health problems and initially, we both said NO WAY to anymore. Now that his health is stable and he is in the really cute and adorable toddler stage, I REALLY want another one. I have given it alot of thought as originally I thoguht it might just be because I missed the "typical tiny baby" phase, but no, I really want another child, not just a baby.

Things that are a bit of a hinderance: I am on a diet and doing well, lol! I live in a 3 bed house, so all rooms being used already (and already had an extension as was a 2 bed house), not sure we could fit 2 car seats and a booster into a 5 seat car. Having said that, if I wait for everything to be perfect, we would never have another. We may not have alot of money left over with a new addition, but we would be rich with love!

ooobedoo

Am now even more broody lol!

brummiebabe

I have 3 children - DS1 age 7, DS2 age 4 and DD aged 9 months!!

It's REALLY, REALLY hard work!!!! Way harder than 2!!!!!!! With 2, you can give them so much more attention - eg you do something with 1, DH does something with another - EASY!! With 3, everything is so much harder as there isn't enough of you to go round. One child always seems to get left out...with us it's, unfortunately, usually DS2 who is quite happy to amuse himself most of the time, and doesn't really demand attention like DS1 does or in a way that a baby does!! This makes me feel SO guilty!!! We naturally try to stop it happening or give him more attention when DD is in bed, but it's really hard!!

The size of the house...um, yes - we have a small 3 bed semi, DSs now share a room - they don't mind though! We could do more with more space, a bigger garden etc...but the kids don't seem to mind!! I was one of 3 and brought up sharing a room with my sister, I never really felt put out!!

Car wise, yes you need to consider the seat issue - we had to change ours!!

Financial - I think this is where it's most noticeable. If you want to go anywhere (eg holidays/days out) it's normally quoted for a family of 4. It's fine now with DD being a baby as she doesn't really 'count' for those numbers, but she will do soon enough!!

Food - my bills are big, with nappies, baby milk etc etc

However, I wouldn't change it for the world!!!!!! My elder 2 are FANTASTIC with their sister & adore her and to see them with her is so rewarding!! We live in a manic household, there's loads of tidying, washing etc, but the kids are happy and so are we!!!!!

If you want a 3rd then go for it - but be prepared for a lot of hard work, feeling constantly exhausted (even more so than with 2!!) and not having much time to yourself!!! It's FAB though!!!!!:D

TheWaltons_3

Three children are HARD work. Especially when young. My 3 are all under 2 and believe me, we struggle at weekends trying to get out and about.

They cost a fortune... we always ask ourselves why we are so skint... and when we do our calculating... it just didn't occur to us that we are now buying for 5 and not 3!!!

I would love another one, but not until these 3 are in school and can help me out a bit! My toddler is fantastic though, she is a big help now - she always tells me when she needs her bum doing, and brings me things... keeps the Twins amused... helps me clean up... but travelling anywhere with 3 of them is a nightmare.

benood

If it's any consolation I reckon that 3 is a lot easier than 4, which is where we'll be in 3 months. New cars (buses) & loft conversion needed.

But there's loads of reasons to stick at 2 - I seldom get a yoghurt nowadays as they're typically sold in 4 packs as are lots of things. With 3 children it's said there's always one left out. Cereal packs seem to empty as soon as they're open. If you're thinking of private education or university costs I don't think you'll get three for the price of two!

Still I'm quite looking forward to number 4, apparently it's the new 2 so my OH keeps saying

Fruity1

I have 2 girls same age as yours, they sleep all night and are pretty good generally. We have so far been away for most of the school hols, infact I have had to leave them at Grannys for 4 days to work. My sister has a 3 month baby, it took her an hr to get ready to go out yesterday with bottles and kit once baby had had an extra feed, she is constantly tired with disrupted nights.

I have just priced the same holiday for us 2+2 and friends 2+3 theirs is £900 more they just have one extra child.

Think of your pelvic floor I sometimes struggle after 2 children section or not.

Hope this helps though I've written it rather quickly.

modgit

My DS are 9, 6 and 8 months. It is HARD work! As mentioned I think the practical side is car, holidays etc.

For us, the elder 2 are able to help which is great, but also starting to have a social life so carting a baby around to football / youth club / after school activities ain't fun.

Going out takes organisation and it takes about an hour to get 3 up, breakfasted, dressed and out, but as you've a baby already that won't be such a shock as with my gap (planned).

However, I always wanted 3 children and don't regret it one little bit.

Our 3rd has been the easiest birth, the sleepiest baby, but the quickest to move! They have 2 others to look up to and chase after.

No help, but think which way round you'd have the most regrets.

themaccas

OObedoo, I know EXACTLY how you feel. I have 3, after my ds was born I grew to love him, it wasn't really an instant thing, he's 17 on thursday and I absolutely adore him, he's been a very easy child, however when dd was born, the instant love I felt hit me like a brick wall and I was desperate to have another as soon as possible. I couldn't have another one for 4 years because I had just started a 3 year course when dd was 6 months old and I knew I would never finish it if I got pregnant half way through. However as soon as the course was finished I was pregnant and ds2 was born within a year of completing it. I have to say I didn't feel the same 'rush' as dd but he has been a similar 'grown to love' like ds1. 3 kids are definately more difficult than 2 and way more expensive, more arguments, messier house .....BUT I am so glad we did it, I love the family dynamics of 3 kids, I love them all the same and couldn't imagine our family any other way.

Go for it! However just check with your doctor I think they advise you to wait 18 months between pregnancies when you have had a c/s.