Things your 5-year-old says!

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

lelasuzi wrote: »

God daughter was 6. We took her to Bulgaria on hol. She`s walking in front of us talking to my best friend, Oh, I`ve got asthma, hay fever, arthritis, piles. I said you haven't, she says I have. This went on for 5 mins then she said ask my mum. I don't need to ask mum and anyway the only thing you haven't got is hypochondria. Head swivvled whats that? She still want it now and she`s 23 in Nov.

Me aged five when somebody tried to be smart with me;

'That's not very nice. Or clever. It's Rheumatoid Arthritis, not osteoarthritis like you get when you're old, like you've got starting in your hand.'

chiefie

My wife, myself and two young children were queueing up to get into a posh pubs restaurant at 6pm one night. When the customers all streamed in and people settled down to look at the menus it started to go quiet. Just at that time my five year old boy quipped up with 'Dad - what's a lesbian ?'. I could feel the eyes upon me, people had heard and wanted to know how I'd answer. What pressure !!

oddies

It was just before Christmas and I asked my Grandchildren 7 & 9 what they had got down on their Christmas List for me, Nothing came the reply from both.. Nothing I said !!! I am fed up of this Nobody buys me a Christmas present.. My Grandson said won't your Friend buy you something ( Me thinking he meant my Friend Carol ) I said who do you mean.. he replied Google !!!! Google I said puzzled he replied well you keep saying Google is my friend :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

kittykitten

A patient was telling me she had fallen, and that was how she had hurt her hand. Queue her 3 year old son: mummy fell over because she was drunk!

Patient was mortified, particularly as she'd just told me it was 9am when she fell!:rotfl:

kitten1959

After buying my then 6year old a Barbie doll house, I asked her why Ken was lying on top of Barbie. 'Its obvious' she said. Worried I asked again, with a big sigh she announced 'because they havnt got bunk beds of course' #relief!

Superscrooge

My nephew after learning about Dinosaurs at school said to me "Were the dinosaurs still alive when you were a boy?"

On another occasion after watching me swallow a painkiller for a badly sprained ankle he said to me "How does that tablet know which leg to go down?"

Feline2001

At our local country show last month we were sat watching the parrot show.

The man got one of the parrots out, held it out and told it to "fly home" the parrot shook it's head and we were asked why it refused, (man went on to explain their deep bond) at which point a little voice in the audience piped up "because you didn't say please!" It was hilarious, but at the same time gratifying to know kiss still learn their manners!!

rwgray

Of course not, they employ people to do it for them!

Rich.x

onlygoingforward

GD almost 5 was discussing that she doesn't want to grow up and leave home wants to live with her mum forever.... My DD then explained about growing up and moving out - pointing she had done her uncle and and her younger uncle will grow up and move out too....

To this she replied " when grandad grows up will he move out as well"


She is also concerned about starting school soon - and has asked for glasses in case the letters are too small??

meritaten

when my granddaughter was small - about 4 I think, she announced she was going to marry her cousin M when she grew up. then said 'Of course I will have lots of other boyfriends first'!