Things your 5-year-old says!

elsien

My niece did once genuinely enquire as to whether the Pope was a Catholic.

cliffsgirl

My 18 year old nephew asked is Vietnam a place or was it just a war!

ali-t

I got a new puppy years ago when i was in my early 20s and my friends 5 year old said aunty ali whos going to look after the dog when you die? Bit of a reality check lol

Primrose

Overheard in the next cubicle to mine at motorway services toilet where a mother was obviously incarcerated with a young daughter "Mummy, does the Queen poo like this ?
"I expect so dear".
"Does she wear her crown while she's doing it?"
I nearly choked with stifled laughter.

pinkshoes

I remember my son telling me that bees buzz because they have little batteries in.

Once when visiting Cotswold Wildlife Park, the rhinos were next to the gate to their house area, and the male one got a HUGE erection and mounted the female. Its "thing" was enormous! Quite a crowd had gathered to view the humping rhinos, then this girl about aged 4 said "Look mummy, that clever rhino is climbing on the other ones back to get over the gate". Queue lots of giggling from the crowd!

mellymoo74

When my brothers were little the youngest N was looking at the room lights he said 'I know how they work, the tricity goes down with wires to the lights and they light up. I bet F (older brother doesn't know)
F came in the room was asked and walked over to the light switch, and with an expression of pure disdain said 'like this' as he used the switch.
They were 8 and 6.

DigForVictory

I keep an ear out for Chinese New Year after my youngest, stumping along the road from church school, announced "I was born in the Year of the !!!!!". As eyebrows lifted & heads began to turn, his elder brother wearily corrected him "you mean Year of the Horse, idiot..."

I'll just not start on the impressive pit of silence an Entire Castle Hall fell into when my little Historian piped up...

Deep_In_Debt

I think I've recounted this before but will repeat it again anyway!

I don't have kids but my brother and 3 nephews came to stay from abroad some years ago. Bro, SIL managed to book 2 rooms with a connecting door so boys in 1 room, bro and SIL in the other with door open all night.

I met them for lunch at the hotel where business meetings were being conducted and we took a table at the back of the restaurant...middle nephew decided to announce loudly during lunch that he had heard dad fart in the night...and then loud conversations continued between the boys about farts for the rest of lunch...we tried to calm it but their voices just got louder!

Hard_Up_Hester

I was at Thorpe Park with my son, we were queuing for one of the rides, in front of us were a group young men wearing long coats & yamulke with long ringlets either side.
My son asked why they were dressed that way I explained that it was because of their religion, they were Jewish like our friend Clive & that I thought they practised Hasidic Judaism.
My son then announced 'We did that in school last week & the opposite is alkaline!'
This made most of the queue laugh, including the young men under discussion.

greenbee

pinkshoes wrote: »

I remember my son telling me that bees buzz because they have little batteries in.

My nephew aged 3 had obviously been observing his toys carefully

"I know why dragons breathe fire." he announced

"Really", we said, "Why's that?"

"Because they have batteries up their bums!"

(I'd like to point out that the toy dragon with the battery up it's bum didn't actually breathe fire, it just sang annoying tunes :cool: but clearly at 3 that's not the point)