noise

Shahni

The neighbour volunteered to you that if he was making too much noise, you should let him know. But although you do think he's making too much noise you haven't actually mentioned anything to him. Chances are he doesn't realise his music can be heard so clearly outside of his property, especially if the other neighbours are quiet. It sounds like your becoming increasingly wound up and imparting malicious intent which in all likelihood isn't there. Why not just talk to him about it. If you can't face a confrontation, write him a polite note instead. None of this "social expectations", he-should-know-what-im-thinking stuff.

Lord_Baltimore

I empathise. Noise is a blight in flats and terraces but you shouldn't have to sit in your place with ear plugs in. Personally, I would be talking to him. Get it out in the open; keeping silent may harm your health more than a confrontation if that is what it takes to get someone else to respect your right to the quiet enjoyment of your home.

Fraise

catoutthebag wrote: »

No I didn't talk to neighbours. Viewed property twice in the day and it was quiet and no one seemed to be around - probably at work - not that I would have got an honest answer anyway.

I have calmed down a little.

Ordered plugs.

Flat has been quiet in the day to day.

Treating it as one off.

let's see what tonight brings.

Going to give it 3-4 weeks of monitoring

Moving and other things have been stressful and caused anxiety so just a bit on edge at the mo

I do sympathise with you, but throughout this thread you seem constantly anxious, on edge and preoccupied with monitoring the noise - all on account of one night when your neighbour played some music.

Firstly, you need to remember that unless you live in ip the middle of a field you'll probably always experience noise of some kind. People living in houses, flats, maisonettes....unless they're completely detached and built in their own land with nothing nearby you will always probably be subjected to noise of some kind.

Some people live on busy main roads with heavy traffic thundering past day and night, or even secondary roads where traffic passes by. Some people have aircraft flying over, trains passing by at the back of their garden.

Some people have neighbours a few houses along or even opposite them in their street, and have young men revving their motorbikes or fast cars every night. Some people hear horrendous screaming, shouting, fighting....often spilling into the street.

New houses in particular have thin walls, and people have to get used to hearing their next door neighbour using the toilet, having fun with their partner.....the TV in the background, music, conversation, footsteps...banging doors....it's all part of living.

If you want total silence you have choices: move and buy a place in the middle of nowhere, kindly ask your neighbour to never play music again or have guests round (can't see him agreeing to that) or if you can't accept that people do make noise with their day to day living, set about providing sound insulation.

You can get floor/ceiling insulation to prevent both impact (footsteps) and acoustic (music) noise. You can also get soundproofing for your walls. It isn't as expensive as you'd imagine..in fact...it's quite cheap for a quiet life.

Maybe your neighbour will go halves with you....you never know. He might relish the thought of having parties and knowing he isn't disturbing anyone!

If you'd like more details of soundproofing companies I can provide them for you. I myself had a sound issue which was resolved for just a few hundred pounds, so I can vouch for these products.

catoutthebag

Thanks for the comments and sympathies.

You are right I have got on edge and anxious.

I guess I can handle it 2 nights a month which appears to be what is alluded to or the current pattern.

If I knew what night it was I could stay somewhere else or have my ear plugs in from the moment my head hit the pillow rather than at 1 am and have trouble getting back to sleep.

In the management company I don't know what constitutes 'occasional party'.

I can't afford sound insulation and I should have to. I may only be here 1-3 years.

At least he's open about it.

Rather than walk to him and mention it, ill see if my pattern is correct.
If it's more frequent ill mention it on passing in the corridor (where he also hangs his laundry unlike inside the flats like everyone else or his balcony etx).

velocity_girl

Sorry OP but I have to agree with others, you are being unreasonable. You have heard some muffled music at lunchtime through the wall of a flat. It's the middle of the day, put your own music on if you don't like being able to hear theirs. Sorry but as someone who has lived in flats for the past ten years, this is just the way it is.

Fraise

Catoutthebag, you've given two different accounts of what you heard on the second day you moved in....just the one occasion you heard your neighbour entertaining and playing music. In your first post you said the music was loudish, then on page 2 you said it was loud and thumping. Which one was it?
Reading through your comments again I saw you're also complaining that your neighbour has the temerity to have his children stay every other weekend.
You're now MONITORING his activities and how often he plays music (once more yesterday for 10 minutes at lunchtime, bank holiday) and you're talking about drawing your lines and how often he should be allowed to entertain.

Some people have a social life, friends, girlfriends, children, certain taste in music regardless of their age....and you're behaving as though you resent his lifestyle.

You're extremely lucky to have friendly neighbours who only make a little noise once in a while, some people have neighbours from hell who cause a nuisance by watching them in a stalk like fashion, complaining incessantly about trivialities, nitpicking, and generally taking their frustrations at their own unhappy lives on neighbours who appear happy, popular and have the lifestyle they themselves would wish.

I offered you advice about sound insulation, which you said is too expensive despite not knowing the cost, and the noise issue cannot be as bad as you feel it is as none of the other neighbours have complained, and you can bet your life they would have done if it was as bad as you're implying.

What is astonishing is how you feel so aggrieved that your neighbour has his children come to stay once a fortnight. My god, you can't dictate when he can have his children stay over.

I can foresee you falling out with all your neighbours.....you sound the type who monitors every little weed in the garden. You've admitted you're unhappy and wound up over other issues, and I think you're venting your anger on this neighbour who played music not to your liking on just ONE occasion. If you sit monitoring the situation you'll never have a life of your own.

catoutthebag

Fraise wrote: »

Catoutthebag, you've given two different accounts of what you heard on the second day you moved in....just the one occasion you heard your neighbour entertaining and playing music. In your first post you said the music was loudish, then on page 2 you said it was loud and thumping. Which one was it?
Reading through your comments again I saw you're also complaining that your neighbour has the temerity to have his children stay every other weekend.
You're now MONITORING his activities and how often he plays music (once more yesterday for 10 minutes at lunchtime, bank holiday) and you're talking about drawing your lines and how often he should be allowed to entertain.

Some people have a social life, friends, girlfriends, children, certain taste in music regardless of their age....and you're behaving as though you resent his lifestyle.

You're extremely lucky to have friendly neighbours who only make a little noise once in a while, some people have neighbours from hell who cause a nuisance by watching them in a stalk like fashion, complaining incessantly about trivialities, nitpicking, and generally taking their frustrations at their own unhappy lives on neighbours who appear happy, popular and have the lifestyle they themselves would wish.

I offered you advice about sound insulation, which you said is too expensive despite not knowing the cost, and the noise issue cannot be as bad as you feel it is as none of the other neighbours have complained, and you can bet your life they would have done if it was as bad as you're implying.

What is astonishing is how you feel so aggrieved that your neighbour has his children come to stay once a fortnight. My god, you can't dictate when he can have his children stay over.

I can foresee you falling out with all your neighbours.....you sound the type who monitors every little weed in the garden. You've admitted you're unhappy and wound up over other issues, and I think you're venting your anger on this neighbour who played music not to your liking on just ONE occasion. If you sit monitoring the situation you'll never have a life of your own.

Wrong wrong wrong

Have you not READ what I wrote?

1) there was LOUD music 2 weeks ago on a Friday night

2) there was QUITE LOUD Music 2 weeks later on Saturday night

3) both past midnight and enough to disturb sleep. ..

Are you still with me?

4) I have a social life which doesn't impact quality of life of others

5) I am conscious and courteous regarding my music volume

Still here?

6) I have NEVER expressed grievance to having his children. I have said that he has them every other week and the weekends in between is where I get a noise issue. Di you comprehend this grossly inaccurate point you made?

7) you mentioned insulation as 'few hundred' - I take that as 300-500. Am I in the right enough ballpark to not know EXACTLY TO THE PENNY

YOU sound aggrieved that I didn't take to your (extreme) sound proofing idea

Feel free to read this post again. For your own sake. This issue is about NOISE POLLUTION and only that.

Guest101

catoutthebag wrote: »

Wrong wrong wrong

Have you not READ what I wrote?

1) there was LOUD music 2 weeks ago on a Friday night

2) there was QUITE LOUD Music 2 weeks later on Saturday night

3) both past midnight and enough to disturb sleep. ..

Are you still with me?

4) I have a social life which doesn't impact quality of life of others

5) I am conscious and courteous regarding my music volume

Still here?

6) I have NEVER expressed grievance to having his children. I have said that he has them every other week and the weekends in between is where I get a noise issue. Di you comprehend this grossly inaccurate point you made?

7) you mentioned insulation as 'few hundred' - I take that as 300-500. Am I in the right enough ballpark to not know EXACTLY TO THE PENNY

YOU sound aggrieved that I didn't take to your (extreme) sound proofing idea

Feel free to read this post again. For your own sake. This issue is about NOISE POLLUTION and only that.

It's simple, you live in a flat, it's not well insulated. That's not your neighbous fault. If he wants to play music, that's his business. What in reality are you going to do about it?

Option A: Talk to him

Option B: get in a confrontation and music goes from every so often to every night....

Fraise

catoutthebag wrote: »

Wrong wrong wrong

Have you not READ what I wrote?

1) there was LOUD music 2 weeks ago on a Friday night

2) there was QUITE LOUD Music 2 weeks later on Saturday night

3) both past midnight and enough to disturb sleep. ..

Are you still with me?

4) I have a social life which doesn't impact quality of life of others

5) I am conscious and courteous regarding my music volume

Still here?

6) I have NEVER expressed grievance to having his children. I have said that he has them every other week and the weekends in between is where I get a noise issue. Di you comprehend this grossly inaccurate point you made?

7) you mentioned insulation as 'few hundred' - I take that as 300-500. Am I in the right enough ballpark to not know EXACTLY TO THE PENNY

YOU sound aggrieved that I didn't take to your (extreme) sound proofing idea

Feel free to read this post again. For your own sake. This issue is about NOISE POLLUTION and only that.

OK, so I missed out the ONE OTHER occasion out of the two times he played music not to your liking, and in your opinion, too loud. You did say you couldn't hear the music playing when you went into your lounge next to your bedroom, so the volume couldn't have been as loud as you're imagining - otherwise the whole block would have heard it...maybe even the nearby houses and other blocks too.

You DID say you found it disconcerting that he had his children staying over some weekends, and quite frankly, you sound a dreadful whinging neighbour who resents other people having a good time.

You come across extremely condescending, untrusting (you said the neighbours would only lie to you anyway), and suspicious. You talk down to people, and people who do that feel small, hence why they try to make other people appear smaller than they are. You've been rude to almost every person on this thread, scoffing at their suggestions and helpful advice, and calling them trolls or insulting their intelligence.

Your attitude is really bad. You have the audacity to complain about him entertaining friends, and then say with a great laugh that it's time you had a big party yourself. It's almost like you want to get on the wrong side of this man. I don't know what your other issues are but you should address those instead.

Goodnight.

Landofwood

catoutthebag wrote: »

Wrong wrong wrong

Have you not READ what I wrote?

1) there was LOUD music 2 weeks ago on a Friday night

2) there was QUITE LOUD Music 2 weeks later on Saturday night

3) both past midnight and enough to disturb sleep. ..

Are you still with me?

4) I have a social life which doesn't impact quality of life of others

5) I am conscious and courteous regarding my music volume

Still here?

6) I have NEVER expressed grievance to having his children. I have said that he has them every other week and the weekends in between is where I get a noise issue. Di you comprehend this grossly inaccurate point you made?

7) you mentioned insulation as 'few hundred' - I take that as 300-500. Am I in the right enough ballpark to not know EXACTLY TO THE PENNY

YOU sound aggrieved that I didn't take to your (extreme) sound proofing idea

Feel free to read this post again. For your own sake. This issue is about NOISE POLLUTION and only that.

I guarantee that within a few months your neighbours will have a bigger problem living next to you, than you will with them.

Your posts reek of bad attitude and angry little man syndrome. I imagine this is directly related to the problems you post about on the relationship forum.

All the best to your poor neighbours.