sarahevie's single quest to mortgage freedom

sarahevie1

Another £8.50 spent today. Had to buy milk, bread. Used pass at play centre. Treat ed kids to sweets as it's Friday.

After school had tea at friends house then dd1 went to a brownie sleepover.

Ex told me he won't be a babysitter,, not sure where this came from as this week he's seen kids a total 2 hrs with 4 hrs planned tomorrow. He has never, ever had them overnight and he had the cheek to say that. This was after the if you want to go out sat you can as I'm not going out now. On the one hand he says he will help with children he's always here etc etc, on the other he gets on his high horse with comments such as I won't be a babysitter, I'm helping you out with childcare etc.

I've not contacted him at all this week as he told me he never wanted to speak to me again, amongst a barrage of abuse. Yesterday and today he's called for a chat. Lots of self pity and how he left me for my own good etc. Don't really want to see him tomorrow but will suck it up for the children.

beanielou

Lovely~~~not.

sarahevie1

Went really well with ex actually. I was super nice to him as he's just lost his dad and I feel sorry for him. I think a lot of the horrible stuff he says is because he's really hurting.

I accept I will never have a night off as I have the girls overnight 7 nights a week, but I don't envy ex his freedom, my main focus is the kids, they bring me so much more happiness than dates. Overall I'm happy with my life, it's not what I wanted or planned but I am so lucky with my kids, house, jobs.

Weekly food shop £36. Will try not to top up.

sarahevie1

Ex has agreed to start counselling, long overdue and I'm really optimistic it will lift him. Ive been so cross with his behaviour that ive lost sight of a fellow human who is hurting so im going to try to be much more sympathetic from now on. His mum has been in hospital this week which I only just found out and it sounds like she also has a terminal condition. Family wise this leaves him with a sibling, parent and the kids which is very upsetting for him and I realise that now. I can't understand when the kids are his closest family why he sees them the least, but instead of getting cross and defensive about it I'm going to be looking for ways to support and perhaps re engage him with the girls for all their sakes. Haven't thought about how to do it yet but I will hopefully find a way.

No social spends today, extra money from shift at supermarket, cancelled date with academic to support ex.

sarahevie1

Spending last seven days.

£120 social spends.
£60 food.
£45 petrol

Walked to church today twice. First for morning service, secondly for family craft session this afternoon. About 8 miles in total. Going to try and not use the car at the weekend from now on for health, wealth reasons.

sarahevie1

Spending last 7 days
£10 phone top up.
£14 two trips to cafe with friends and kids.
£10 birthday present
£7 top up shop.
£10 theatre drinks and interval snacks.
£36 food shop.

Pleased with this.
Today is the start of m my next 7 days and spent £29 in marks and Spencer. Thought I had a £20 gift card from a parent at school but it was only £10 when it swiped through the hand written card said £20 so it was a little odd. Spent £25 in aldi on fruit ma nd veg. £54 already on groceries so need to not spend anymore.

I've invited the accountant from 3 weeks ago over tomorrow as he's a nice person and it will be nice to have some adult company.

sarahevie1

Had a lovely evening with the accountant shared a bottle 8th w Wine. I really quite like him. Within b 3 hrs of deciding on second date with him ex wanted to give it another go. So confused!

Ex is the love of my life but it doesn't mean I think we are good together. I can't erase the heartache and I keep thinking about being referred to occupational health by my head over emotional abuse. Anyway seeing ex tomorrow to discuss his counselling, medicine, mum.

No spend day

beanielou

I wont say what I think!!

gallygirl

beanielou wrote: »

I wont say what I think!!

If you're thinking what I think you're thinking - I'm thinking it too :rotfl:.

Brodiebobs

gallygirl wrote: »

If you're thinking what I think you're thinking - I'm thinking it too :rotfl:.

me too, possibly with more swears :rotfl: