Elderly parents, do they drive you mad!

Errata

margaretclare wrote: »

It's fatal to ask someone 'how are you?' unless you want it all, book, chapter and verse. .

That's quite a sweeping generalisation and frankly utter nonsense.

margaretclare

Errata wrote: »

That's quite a sweeping generalisation and frankly utter nonsense.

It springs from bitter experience.

lessonlearned

As you know my mum has just died. She was in a nursing home.

My sister works in a certain well known chemist in a small market town. Her customers have got to know her and they love and trust her. They often tell her far more than she wants to know, especially the more elderly ones but she has learnt how to be patient and kind to them. She has come to realise that many of them live alone and are just very lonely.

There was one particular gentleman who came into the shop who used to irritate her, always grumpy and moaning about his ailments., she admits she often used to duck into the back room to avoid having to serve him.

Then when mum went into the nursing home she noticed this gentleman sitting with a female resident. Despite being ill and frail he came to visit his wife who had advanced Alzheimer's every single day. She never recognised him and as sometimes happens in these cases, she was often horrible to him, verbally abusive, spitting at him, scratching him etc.

My sister then realised how sad this man was, how lonely and what a miserable existence he was living. She took him under her wing, would chat and laugh and joke with him, take him a bar of chocolate now and then and just generally be nice to him and show a bit of interest in him. He has really blossomed and cheered up and he's a lovely man.

As my sister says - you just never know do you. Now she makes a point of not being impatient when her elderly customers go into great detail about their ailments, she listens to them and chats with them and always tries to share a joke or a laugh with them.

Knit_Minion

margaretclare wrote: »

Yes, I agree that *some* older people do discuss medical details at great length. When we used to go to the Methodist Church there was a group of 3 of them sat on the back row and it was always 'been to the doctor, changed my tablets.....' and so on. The last time DH and I came back across the Channel we encountered a couple looking like our age-group, and instantly the woman backed me into a corner (we were looking for the refreshment area!) and I got her husband's entire medical history in about 3 minutes flat. I was a complete stranger!! It's fatal to ask someone 'how are you?' unless you want it all, book, chapter and verse. DH always says 'Never felt better in me life' and that usually shuts them up. Insides, though, are a different matter, far more embarrassing than a few tablets.

That is my dad, he is not only obsessed with his medical history but everyone else's. I cringe if I hear him on the phone sometimes as he practically interrogates family/friends on their medical problems.

I actually try not to tell him if I have to go to the doctors.

zygurat789

Knit_Minion wrote: »

That is my dad, he is not only obsessed with his medical history but everyone else's. I cringe if I hear him on the phone sometimes as he practically interrogates family/friends on their medical problems.

I actually try not to tell him if I have to go to the doctors.

My Dad used to tell me his medical problems until I pointed out that they were hereditary problems after that he wasn't so outgoing.