Do you put in for coworker's presents?

BigAunty

When I worked for BT many years ago, I was employed after industrial action. Some colleagues refused to chip in towards presents for strike breakers or s-c-a-b-s as they referred to them.

j.e.j.

We used to get this all the time, and it was doubly bad because we had quite a high turnover of staff, so giving everyone a leaving present was just ridiculous, really. Personally I wouldn't want a birthday gift from others, so I wouldn't want to feel pressured into contributing to gifts for them.

lulu_92

I'm so glad I'm not the only one who realises it's a lot of money. I give what I can but I'd rather put the money towards my savings.

There's also nights out and meals and parties, probably 3 times a month and I don't really want to go them for financial and personal reasons, yet I feel like I have to give justification for not going.

pickledonionspaceraider

Only if it is a close colleague. The most I have ever put in is a fiver...normally £2-£3 dependant on what is in my purse

j.e.j.

lulu_92 wrote: »

I'm so glad I'm not the only one who realises it's a lot of money. I give what I can but I'd rather put the money towards my savings.

There's also nights out and meals and parties, probably 3 times a month and I don't really want to go them for financial and personal reasons, yet I feel like I have to give justification for not going.

My job and co-workers were not my cup of tea to say the least, and I decided I was only going to be with them if I was actually paid to be there :rotfl: so if they wanted to socialise and they wanted me to go along it had to be within working hours. I didn't go to meals out of an evening and resented the pressure on people to do so.

lulu_92

j.e.j. wrote: »

My job and co-workers were not my cup of tea to say the least, and I decided I was only going to be with them if I was actually paid to be there :rotfl: so if they wanted to socialise and they wanted me to go along it had to be within working hours. I didn't go to meals out of an evening and resented the pressure on people to do so.

I hate the pressure of it. I'm perfectly happy going in, doing my job, getting on with the people I work with and going home. The amount of times I've been asked to "just book a hotel" for a night out is ridiculous.

It's fairly obvious that the people I work with have more disposable income than I do (I would too if I didn't save my socks off) or have different priorities. I would rather be able to afford to go out with my friends at home, or my OH, seeing as I don't see any of them that often now.

I do bake cakes and stuff to bring in every few weeks or so as I get bored on a Sunday and clear out my cupboards! That seems to shut people up.

browneyedbazzi

We don't have that many collections in my office - milestone birthdays, leavers and people going on maternity leave are about the limit.

I give depending on my relationship with the person - people I know well and like I give to, those I don't know or like I don't. It's never been an issue but no one stands over you to see if/what you put in.

I'm also a baker and often bring in cakes or treats to be shared out in the office - I think that is probably appreciated more than money in a collection that is inevitably used to buy something the receiver doesn't want/like.

Snakey

I like people who bake cakes for the office.

When I stopped being interested in getting drunk with my co-workers, I spent a few years making up excuses and worrying whether I was convincing enough and whether people thought badly of me and so on. When I decided to stop doing that one day, and just say "nah, not my sort of thing/don't fancy it", I was surprised how readily that was accepted by pretty much everybody.

From having been on the other side of the fence myself, I know that it can put a downer on a good night out if there are a bunch of people who clearly don't want to be there and begrudge the money and the time that they consider they're wasting. It must vary a lot between companies, but (as with the birthday collections) I do wonder how much of this "well, I feel I have to, really" is self-inflicted, especially in big departments.

Just say you're saving up for a house and don't have any spare money, and see what happens. It may be just fine and you'll wonder why you were ever stressed.

lulu_92

Snakey wrote: »

I like people who bake cakes for the office.

When I stopped being interested in getting drunk with my co-workers, I spent a few years making up excuses and worrying whether I was convincing enough and whether people thought badly of me and so on. When I decided to stop doing that one day, and just say "nah, not my sort of thing/don't fancy it", I was surprised how readily that was accepted by pretty much everybody.

From having been on the other side of the fence myself, I know that it can put a downer on a good night out if there are a bunch of people who clearly don't want to be there and begrudge the money and the time that they consider they're wasting. It must vary a lot between companies, but (as with the birthday collections) I do wonder how much of this "well, I feel I have to, really" is self-inflicted, especially in big departments.

Just say you're saving up for a house and don't have any spare money, and see what happens. It may be just fine and you'll wonder why you were ever stressed.

It is quite refreshing to read this.

Believe me, I've tried the house thing and they don't budge. They say "oh well when you move you will have more money!"

Liz3yy

I work for a large company with various departments. My department has around 25 people in it. With pregnancies, leavers, birthdays, weddings etc...there seems to be a collection every week, twice a week even. I've stopped putting money in as I simply can't afford it. When it comes to my birthday I'm not bothered at all if I recieve gifts or not from my colleagues. I was a little embarrassed last year when I was presented with a bag full of wine, chocolate, bath stuff and a purse. It was lovely but a card would have been more than enough.