The Garden Fence - help and support in tough times

Nargleblast

Baby steps, Mrs LW. I believe there will be a day soon when another animal comes into your life, and you will know when it's the right time and the right animal. In the meantime, accept you are going to have some less-than-good days and observe them as they pass, saying "that's another of those days done with!" Easy for me to say, I know, but I know how I would feel if I lost our two moggies. Get right under your skin, these animals, don't they?

Jazee

Morning fencers.

Sorry to hear you're having down days Mrs LW but it's perfectly natural after the loss of anyone/thing we love so much. I'm a great believer that the right dogs comes along to us at the right time. DH is saying he is ready for another dog 'of his own' as its over 18 months since SickDog died, but we're not going looking. The right dog will come to him at the right time.

This weekend is one of celebrations for us and I'm so glad the day is here. It has been a particularly fraught week in the build up so fingers crossed everything goes to plan. Keeping surprises is so hard.

Have a great day everyone.

mardatha

MrsL that's how I felt after the chickens went. They gave me something to get up for even on cold horrible mornings, a routine. I find retirement boring, and between the ME and our very rural location finding things to occupy my far too lively mind is very hard.

[Deleted User]

Thank you all very much for being kind and understanding, I feel more positive this morning but yesterday I think I looked into the void that Docky has left clearly for the first time since he left us and nearly fell in. We've been filling days with all the things that have needed doing that we couldn't do when we had him with us and being so busy has masked the emotions somewhat. Yesterday though that realisation truly came of his loss and had to be accepted, very hard to swallow but there is no alternative and it had to be done. I'm usually a very positive person so I WILL work through this and I'm sure find that place of balance again as soon as is possible but I'm also only human and know that some days will be bleak. Thank you for your caring, support and kindness it helps greatly and knowing you are all in the world gives me a staff to lean on when I need it, Lyn xxx.

ivyleaf

Jazee I hope everything goes brilliantly today and that you will be able to tell us about it when it's all over!

Popperwell Do go carefully won't you, don't want you wearing yourself out! but I daresay mcculloch will let you know if she thinks you're overdoing things.

Mcculloch Hope you will enjoy having your place to yourself

Lyn Thinking of you x My BIL and his wife have a darling Airedale, nearly 14 now and they are dreading the day he leaves them.

burtha

Hi ,quick post as feel like I am splashing around trying to keep my head above water .....just need another 10hours per day ....
Hope everyone has had a good weekend and hugs Lynn ,small hairy creatures leave a mess and a very big gap when they are gone.....xx

Popperwell

Interesting posts which all make sense to me...


Its who I am...on the way home from Durham on a crowded bus from the Durham Miners Gala someone gave up his seat for me(being I was loaded down with rucksack, folding chair and a walking stick)I say next to an elderly lady(when are we classed as elderly?)Suspect we never see it in ourselves. We got talking and I think by the time I reached my stop she had something to think about. Spends a lot of time at home alone. Its her birthday today(74)


I saw a lot of the Gala this year more than usual(my third)Heard/saw the speeches. Some of the bands marching through the streets at the start and end of the day. Where they all meet up in front of the hotel play their special "Party piece" to the guests watching on the balcony. Only missed what happens in the Cathedral. The place was heaving. Only bad thing...we all had a great view of the speakers and were close to the stage...if everyone had stayed as they were everyone could see.


When the first speakers came to podium five to seven people in front of us stood up and blocked our view and all we could see was the back of them. They took no notice/didn't care that they were blocking our view, just that they could see everything. otherwise the day was great.


Sunday I gardened again hedge cut, lawns strimmed. Stubborn weeds have had weed killer applied. I don't know how it takes to see them die. Next its lawn feed/moss killer to be applied and fences to be painted. Getting somewhere now.


I won £10 on the Domino card last night so the night out only cost £2.


This week free music events around the area(have to decide whether to miss the music club)as events clash. A concert on Thursday afternoon, entertainment all next weekend in Durham City and a poetry event with Ian McMillan, illustrations by Tony Husband who I follow and tweet with on Twitter.


I await to see what unexpected event messes things up...its all going too well.:rotfl:

shanks77

Wow Pops you don't half get around well done you. I am the opposite love to stay at home and enjoy my own company though I sometimes think I enjoy it too much as the thought of going out meeting people does not fill me with joy.
Mrs LW the pain eventually fades but it takes a long time and I find now many years after my last one passed that it's the silly small things that hurt the most but you do find yourself one day smiling more than you cry. We are here with shoulders if you need us xx.
Fairly quiet weekend here managed to fall down my stairs last night and bruise my coccyx and pride. Could have been worse but fortunately have a lot of padding to protect me so just tender which will heal soon enough.
Back to work tonight so will start mentally preparing all the the things I have to do. Maybe get round to it after another cuppa.
Have a good day folks xx

Jazee

Me again just to report that the big 50 celebrations on Saturday went brilliantly, couldn't have wished for a better day.

Supposed to be at paid stuff, just having a cuppa, so catch you all later.

moneyistooshorttomention

Popping in again to say that I've now put in my official claim to my State Pension (as I retired at my Retirement Age of 60 and in receipt of work part of my pension - but my revised State Pension Age is later than that darn it).

So - cue for me on the phone today and putting in my official claim for the rest of my pension to start up shortly - at last:T

Official at other end duly quoted me a figure that is about £20 more per week than the full Basic State Pension. I'm due for some Serps pension and a teeny little bit of Graduated Pension on top of that full Basic State Pension.

Last time I saw a Pension Forecast was a couple of years back (ie before I retired) and I swear I recall that my Extra Pension (ie that Serps and Graduated pensions) was about £30 per week and, obviously, there has been about 2 years worth of inflation since then.

Cue for more paperwork and I have to look out those last Pension Forecasts - to check whether it was about £30 per week of Extra Pension and just how much my inflation rises have been on that part of my pension since then. DWP official at other end of phone was busily saying that the word "estimate" is used on those Pension Forecasts as an excuse for them trying to pay me less than I expected. I obviously wonder whether the Government has come up with some excuse to "freeze" cost of living rises on Extra Pension bits like Serps in between a womans Retirement Age (ie the 60th birthday my generation expected) and her Revised State Pension Age and somehow they've managed to (quite officially) nick £10 odd per week of my income level I am shortly to have and my inflation-rises-I-should-have-had on it.:mad:

So - more blinkin' paperwork to do - ie in order to check my figures. Must see whether something has gone wrong and then figure out (if so) whether its been by accident or design.

Has anyone had anything similar done to them - and what happened about it? (I do know I'm due for the work pension I have had since my Retirement Age of 60 and a full State Pension and my Serps/Graduated Pension should have had their cost-of-living rises since I retired at 60).

I know there is a Triple Lock arrangement of Basic State Pensions are supposed to rise annually in line with either 2.5% OR inflation OR salaries (whichever is the higher) and I presume extra bits of pension (like Serps/Graduated Pension) have some sort of legislation laid down that they have to have the same (even if the person has retired at Retirement Age - but this isn't due until a later revised State Pension Age)????