Mothers-in Law

Icey77

My MIL thinks I'm wonderful (and I am, obviously!:rotfl:) so that goes a long way in the good relationship stakes!

DH is an only child so she's not going to get anymore in-laws and she'll only have our children as grandchildren. She and my FIL are both great, very generous and very nice to spend time with.

I'm not sure what my DH would say about my Mum. I find her hard work at times and at times I'd swear she likes the idea of being a Nanny much more than actually being a Nanny to two small grandchildren, but perhaps this will change as they get older.

I still feel very, very sad that DH or children didn't get to meet my Dad. He would have been besotted with our kids and would have been a fabulous Grandpa

Timpu

I have a great MIL and FIL, they are kind and thoughtful, never imposing on us. It's a genuine joy when they're able to come and stay or we're able to go and see them. I realise I'm very, very lucky.

My OH sadly got the raw end of the deal, my Mum may mean well but is often rude, demanding, patronising and manipulative, as well as being very old fashioned in her ideas (she wouldn't let us stay overnight at their place when we were unmarried as we were 'living in sin'. It was as if she'd suddenly discovered religion after all these years and assumed we had too but forgot to send us the memo :rotfl: :rotfl:). She seems to think the world needs a good lecture at every opportunity. My Dad does his best but after years of trying has given up. I can't say I blame him at all.

It does make for interesting visits, OH is brilliant in subtly pointing out to her he's not the massive idiot she assumes he is. I love him for doing it so carefully and effectively.

roobee13

My ex MIL (though me and ex weren't married) was lovely and I got on well with her, shame her son was an absolute tool!

My now OH's Mum passed away 18 months before I met him, so sadly I never got to meet her. However you can tell from the way OH and his Dad talk about her that she was completely adored. I'd like to think we would have got on.

Some of these MIL stories are horrendous, I'm quite stunned that people think its ok to act like that!

PenguinOfDeath

Timpu wrote: »

My OH sadly got the raw end of the deal, my Mum may mean well but is often rude, demanding, patronising and manipulative, as well as being very old fashioned in her ideas (she wouldn't let us stay overnight at their place when we were unmarried as we were 'living in sin'. It was as if she'd suddenly discovered religion after all these years and assumed we had too but forgot to send us the memo :rotfl: :rotfl:)

:rotfl: I have selectively a religious parent and MIL too, doesn't even cross their minds 99% of the time, but when it can cause a fuss, they can make the Pope look like an Atheist!

fairy_lights

My sort of mother in law (me and OH are not actually married) has very outdated views and beliefs, and I often have to bite my tongue when she's around.
She's homophobic; "I don't mind gays but it would break my heart if one of my kids was gay", racist; "I'm not being racist but they all smell of curry" and has very outdated views on gender roles; "I'm proud to say the toilet in my house has never been cleaned by a man, that's a womans job." :eek:
OH had indeed never cleaned a toilet until he left home, he didn't have a clue where to begin. I've had to teach him things that most 12 year olds can do - how to boil an egg, clean a toilet, change a bed etc, because his mother thought that as a boy, he didn't need to be taught these basic life skills.
She's not someone I would ever trust or call a friend and find her very difficult to be around sometimes when she starts ranting about something about immigrants that she's read in the daily mail.

Mr_Toad

My MIL law is a wonderful woman. :A

When my wife and me split up 11 years ago the only thing we argued about was custody of her mother. She acted as part time house keeper for us.

It started when the children were babies and she never stopped coming 'to help out'. :T:T

I won custody and she still comes to my place a couple of times a week and keeps me clean and tidy and does the laundry etc.

vesper

My Mil was a wonderful woman, she didn't get on with her husband and was blind so we spent a lot of time together. I used to take her on days out, in fact we spent more time together than she did with my oh.
Unfortunately my Fil is the complete opposite. He is controlling and only he is right. So much so that he tried to get oh to leave me, and when he wouldn't he banned me from the house and seeing my Mil.
Unfortunately I never saw my Mil again, she died from cancer 2 years later. I wasn't allowed to see her, I never forgave him that I wasn't allowed to say goodbye. Neither did oh, especially as he found out about her death on a social media page, even though they were in contact because of his mother.

My Fil is now facing his own battles but I haven't seen him in years, and don't plan to.i feel sad that it's come to this but I can't forgive him.

ben_m_g

Never had that bad a MIL or nightmare girlfriend's mother. Do have an auntie in law, who seems to fit the profile.

SO never sees her, but when she does, the topic is always switched to her darling son (who can do no wrong) and always draws a comparison between me and him (mostly because we work in the same field).

The big issue is that he went to uni, where I didn't (Aunty being a teacher, this is a cardinal sin or something.)

Of course he is so smart and going to do great things. and asks such delightful questions like "why couldn't go to university?" "Would not be able to cope?"

And of course her son is making "really good money", and she tells me that it's not too late to get my degree, so I can earn as much as him.

I've never told her but I've been earning more than him for the last three years at least, and make at least 10k more than him now.

University would have been nice but not an option, of course this falls on deaf ears.

Crabapple

Some really awful in-laws out there

Hubby's parents are split and each remarried so I've got two sets. Actual MIL is mad as a box of frogs but absolutely lovely and is wonderful with my children. She's quite religious but we don't have issues about it (although my protestant upbringing does sometimes mean the catholic norms go way over my head!). She was praying many years for my hubby to find a nice woman and have a family so she was very happy I came on the scene :rotfl: Her hubby is also lovely.

Step-MIL is an alcoholic. When she's 'up', ie not drinking too much, she's lovely. When she's down she and FIL avoid us, lie, fall out with everyone and generally are not people we want around, especially not round the children. It's a shame that people can let an addiction take over their lives to the detriment of not seeing their family (not just us, other children and grandchildren too). As much as we know it's the drink causing everything and it's not as easy as just stopping when you've relied on it for 40+ years, we still wish they could see what harm it is doing to everyone and ditch the demon bottle