The KonMarie method

iQueen

PollyWollyDoodle wrote: »

I highly recommend Bravissimo - fabulous service and a huge (in every sense!) range. And their fitting ladies are really friendly and put you at ease.

GreyQueen that has made me howl out loud ... but also made me pause for thought. I grew up in a home which was rich in many things but not in cash. Being the youngest, I rarely had anything new unless it was made by my mum; her dressmaking skills were fabulous but she was quite old-fashioned and until I began earning money, clothes were a constant source of anguish to me. I never looked 'right' and it's taken me years to overcome that and develop my own style and feel comfortable about it. I think I may have to have a conversation with my PB and find out what she's scared of.

You are so right about the sandals, though! Been there, done that. :rotfl:

Strangely enough, I did a post on this topic this morning on another website.

GQ's and everyone's PBs are powerfully influenced by survival strategies that were essential, since the advent of homo sapiens approximately 2-4 million years ago! It was natural to gather and store as much of life's essentials, in an attempt to live.

When we consider that homo sapiens has been doing this for so long, it is easy to see that the vastly increased abundance of life's essentials (plus unnecessary junk) over only 50 years or so, has not altered the primitive mindset, and it will be many, many generations before the urge to acquire and hoard evolves, if ever.

In terms of time, todays excess has caught us unawares, like letting children loose in a sweetshop, we don't know how to handle it. Especially with our PBs warning us to get, get, get, otherwise we will die!

People have the largest disposable incomes ever, and they use it to to buy carp, mostly, that they don't need at all. Also, credit is taken for granted. Back in the 50s and 60s, credit was anathema to most people: they saved for things, often for years. Things like their 'bottom drawer', (which obviously was empty at the start!), or a brand new three piece suite, which was usually purchased when the children were grown up, and was the only new one ever owned. Things were only replaced when (like GQ) they were literally worn out, or impossible to repair. (Where have all the cobblers gone?)

So, I guess we will be giving our PBs stern lectures, for the rest of our lives. And let's not forget that there are many people in the world, who still have to heed their PBs, in order to survive.

gallygirl

Anyone in the East Mids send me a PM - a great factory shop near me that sells Fantasie bras for £13, Fauve for £26 etc, plus swimwear and a free fitting service :T

iQueen

GreyQueen wrote: »

My self-consciousness about never looking 'right' lead me to a lot of unnecessary consumption as I tried to find the look which would make me acceptable, popular and whatever.

I eventually grew in self-confidence to the degree where I can hold this chatter of social anxiety at bay for a while, but it does leave me susceptible to the blandishments of the clothing industry.

Or it would have, if they bothered catering for gangly nearly-sixfooters who take a size 18 in clothing and a size 9 shoe. If more fitted me, I'd've probably spent a lot more than I have on clothing over the years.

PB is the Inner Brat, the part of my headspace which is like a truculent toddler with a greedy character. Not very evolved, is PB. Anthromorposising her gives me a chance to recognise, laugh at, and manage PB-driven desires and behaviours.

Ditto here, for no personal style! I grew up in the age when 'grown-up' meant wearing the same as your mother - smart and relatively classic, which was great as a teenager. It made you look grown-up! :dance:

But Boho came along and I think that I'm still Boho at heart. Trouble is it is more difficult to pull off, now I'm not so sylph-like and a shrinking 5 foeet 4 ins! And I can only wear compensating heels for rare (short) special occasions, and nowhere near the 4inch ones that I wore as a London clippie in the 60s!

But, hey, GQ now, you can probably afford (with the money that you are saving - you are saving by not acquiring, aren't you?) to buy better quality from shops specialising tall, beautiful women. The silver lining.

When you knock on my door, to help with my kondoing, I shall expect you to present a stunning, immaculately presented image!

iQueen

gallygirl wrote: »

Anyone in the East Mids send me a PM - a great factory shop near me that sells Fantasie bras for £13, Fauve for £26 etc, plus swimwear and a free fitting service :T

Aye up, me duck! I was brought up in Long Eaton! My oldest son still lives there.

What a shame! Recently kondoed my bras (Triumph Amourette - brilliant, have worn them for over 20 years!). I found that I had 17! Further kondoing turned up another 5, so I probably have enough to see me out!

The East Midlands used to be brilliant for market clothes, because most were manufactured fairly locally, and all the decent seconds were sold on markets.

Oh, for the days when I could get brilliant, quality shoes for 19/11.

june89

I was watching a YouTuber who has discovered Kondoing. She did her vanity and wow, SO much stuff - even in the after! Quite an impressive cut down though. It's very long, but may be interesting. She also did her wardrobe which is probably linked from that video...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-pR6D3xtytE

It did inspire me to take a second look at my makeup drawer. I'd already cleared it out a few months ago but pre-Kondo. This is what happened...

Before:


After:


I probably could have gotten rid of the palettes tucked in the back (and therefore the brushes, since that's what I use them for - everything else is in travel friendly crayon/pencil format) but they make me happy to look at. So for now, they're staying.

I did clear out enough space to move my hair things (also Kondoed) into those empty dividers so all of that stuff is in one drawer now.

springdreams

jaybee wrote: »

I have had a massive purge of 'stuff' and the house is feeling a lot lighter for it (as am I). One thing, though: have any of you searched for something that you have turned out (and regretted)? I have ~sigh~!

Islandmaid I am interested in your *proper bras*. I too have had shoulder/neck probs since my 20s (I.m now 70!!!!!!) and have had lots of chiro and physio treatments. It would be great if a *proper* bra could even go halfway to relief!

MK says that most people will regret throwing out around 3 things, but they soon get over it.

I took another 2 full bags of books to the chazzer on Saturday, and have another one ready to drop off this coming weekend. Hopefully I will have filled another bag or two by then too. Progress is slow as I can only kondo over weekends, but at least there is progress being made.

I've not yet got to the stage of not bringing new things into my home ...

VJsmum

I had a strange conversation with my brother's girlfriend at the weekend. Bear in mind that i am 51 and she is 25 (he is 44 - but that's a whole other thread!:D). She was trying to choose a dress for a night out, and sighing that the one she liked was £35

"well" said I, "that's not bad for a nice dress"
"no", she said " but when you are only going to wear it once...." :eek:

"come again?"
"I only wear a thing once for a night out, cos there will be pictures and stuff so i can't be seen in it again"

I can't tell you how shocked i was - this is a girl who has very little money but won't wear something twice, even if she loves it, even if she feels fab in it. Unbelievable...

freyasmum

VJsmum - that's a sign of the times. SO many of my friends are like that - even my sister to a degree. I find it such a ridiculous waste! :eek:

I'm just back from ice skating, it was brilliant - we had the rink to ourselves :dance:

In other news, my car needs a new engine It's not even old - JUST 6 years So it's a good job I've cut down a LOT of unnecessary spends! I've been looking at cars for most of the evening.

After spending most of the morning 'researching' holidays. Well, that's that hit on the head for another year Typical!

I'm not doing any kondoing tonight, just going to go to sleep. To recover Thank you for the advice earlier

MyHappinessProject

GreyQueen wrote: »

Here's a few bits of the inner dialogue between Primitive Brain (PB) and the rest of me, which is actually an intelligent and well-educated woman in her middle years. We'll call that version Higher Brain (HB)...........

Oh GreyQueen that was fab! It made me laugh but hit the nail right on the head. The internal struggles that we are all having...it is good to divide it up into the Primative brain and Higher brain... makes it more clear somehow.
Please keep on posting everyone, it is so encouraging when i am struggling with all my insecurities about letting go of all these prcious things/ carp.

MyHappinessProject

iQueen wrote: »

My home still has a long way to go, but the biggest change is ME. After quite a few years of literally 'waiting for the end', I'm now enjoying being alive and I'm truly happy again. I also have new ambitions, which didn't cross my mind before MK.

iQueen, that is wonderful. I am so pleased for you!
I too am finding the book well worth its weight in gold. I am so glad I invested in it and did not wait in the library queue for it, even though at the time I could ill afford it. It has changed the way I feel about things. So although I have still a long way to go( still fighting my way through the paperwork!) I am already feeling like a different person, lighter and stronger somehow. I am so grateful to Marie Kondo for writing her book and I am proud to have kondoed things that have been hanging around for years , blocking my life. Go us!