The KonMarie method

jaybee

I have had a massive purge of 'stuff' and the house is feeling a lot lighter for it (as am I). One thing, though: have any of you searched for something that you have turned out (and regretted)? I have ~sigh~!

Islandmaid I am interested in your *proper bras*. I too have had shoulder/neck probs since my 20s (I.m now 70!!!!!!) and have had lots of chiro and physio treatments. It would be great if a *proper* bra could even go halfway to relief!

GreyQueen

Glad it's not just me.

I'm finding consumerism pretty distasteful, to be frank. Not in a holier-than-thou-I'm-so-perfect superiority complex sort of way, but a general abhorrence for excess, almost a physical revulsion for Too Much Stuff.

It seems that I am seeing a lot of problems with Stuff, in personal life, in working life, in general life. I encounter families who have become estranged from each other over a few items. Knew of two mature women who fell out over who inherited Mother's button tin, FGS. And other things equally silly.

Seems to me that too many people are being owned by their possessions rather than the other way around.

There's an old saying; shrouds have no pockets. We're not taking it with us, lovely peeps, although I reckon some people would do a pharoah if given half a chance.

Here's a few bits of the inner dialogue between Primitive Brain (PB) and the rest of me, which is actually an intelligent and well-educated woman in her middle years. We'll call that version Higher Brain (HB).

On viewing the clothes situation;

HB It's not too bad, really, PB. It all fits on one 3ft rail, in one (unmassive) chest of drawers plus the jumpers in the airing cupboard. Not excessive by most people's standards. Could even get rid of some of the less-worn stuff, I think.

PB: There's not enough! We haven't got party clothes and posh frocks or sandals and there's only one pair of shoes. What if we want to wear a skirt or dress with flat shoes, we'll look like a duck! Badness! Insufficiency! Poverty! Lack! Want! Wahhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HB: But we don't like going to parties, do we? We like small gatherings of friends in their homes or an unpretentious pub. Anyway, the orthotics clinic said no heels higher than 1 inch and must be lace-ups. Plus didn't we swear off sandals after getting sunburned feet? On more than one occasion? Remember the 1980s Gladiator Sandal Stripy Sunburn Incident? That hurt like flip for two whole weeks, you'll recall. And it wasn't the only time, it happens every summer. Anyway, we don't have a posh frock lifestyle. If someone invited us anywhere which required one, we'd develop flu or something to get out of it. You know we would, we've done it many a time before. We hate dressing up, both of us.

PB; (sulkily) There;'s NOT ENOUGH. We wear the same thing a lot. People will think we're Poor and won't love us. We won't be Popular and will die alone and be eaten by our alsation dogs in our sad and lonely flat. It happens, you know?

HB: We're not dog people, PB. Highly unlikely to be eaten by a non-pet. And you know that you can barely spend an evening alone without the phone going several times, and friends and family are constantly checking up on you. We're popular enough already. Heck, between work and home this afternoon, we visited - by invitation - two separate friends for tea. One lot gave us chocolate biscuits! And another taught us to read some silver hallmarks. We've got friends!

PB: (even more sulkily) If you don't have lots of clothes, even if you don't want, need or wear them, it's a Bad Thing. You're a failure. Everyone knows this in their hearts. It's why you have to have lots of Stuff. Or you'll be cold and lonely and even naked. And your few clothes will be lonely for company and hate you.

HB: Now you're just being silly, PB. Do grow up!.

PB: Shan't! I'm the Primitive Brain, remember? I got stuck and didn't grow up with the rest of us. I saw white melamine in the chest of drawers yesterday, you know? Buy more clothes, pleeze, I'm feeling scared.

Islandmaid

jaybee wrote: »

Islandmaid I am interested in your *proper bras*. I too have had shoulder/neck probs since my 20s (I.m now 70!!!!!!) and have had lots of chiro and physio treatments. It would be great if a *proper* bra could even go halfway to relief!

Jaybee Now I,m not a small gal in the boob department - I went to a proper local ladieswear shop, the type I would never have dreamed of going in and asked for a fitting, they recommended a Playtex bra that could support an elephants bum - its not pretty, with huge thick straps. I,ve been wearing pretty underwired bra,s 36 DD for years, I,m now in a 40C 'over shoulder, boulder holder' and it feels great .

iQueen

GreyQueen wrote: »

YES!

I have stuff which isn't good enough to donate but which I can't bear to part with until it's utterly worn out. I actually feel glad when something clothing or household textile-wise fails in such a way that it makes the decision for me.

After work and mooching at home, I'm wearing a longsleeved tee which has seen better days (possibly better decades, even) and which is starting to wear out. When it's more knackered, it'll go for ragging, but until then, I need a few non-special things to loll around in at home/ garden in.

The trick is to try to control the inventory or you'll end up with more gardening/ decorating clothes than anyone other than a professional will ever need.

Have started assembling the next chazzer bag, and have been tidying a few things away. Looking around, I feel as if I have crossed a rubicon of tidiness, somehow. It's gone from hell hole to almost tidy.

KM germs have clearly spread throughout my life, and not bringing anything more into the home, bar food and a few books (mostly library) is certainly helping.

Anyone else feel a reluctance to acquire in the knowledge that it will probably result in buyers' remorse and more decluttering down the line?

I have to agree about all this gardening/DIY clothing. WHY do we have to wait until they are completely unwearable, before we turn off the life support?

I am saving two sets of tatty clothes: one set of layers for gardening and a lighter set for decorating. Which means that most of the clothes that I have been wearing around the house will have to go, even though they're not great, but not rags.

I'm tempted to keep a lovely jacquard cardigan that I was living in, till a couple of weeks ago, when I noticed that the elbow had gone through... now I'm thinking of darning it... because I can, and I like darning! (OK, I can hear the roar of Konverts shouting " Get a life, woman!") :eek:

They're right.

Shabby clothes are fine for grotty activities, but as MK says, we should be lounging in proper lounging clothes and wearing nice clothes about the house. That way we will feel good all the time and (nearly) always approach life optimistically.

I'm certainly getting tougher all the time about allowing things into my home, from any source. No way do I want to end up in this state again. If I did, I probably wouldn't be physically or mentally able to cope. At my age, that way lies madness.

My home still has a long way to go, but the biggest change is ME. After quite a few years of literally 'waiting for the end', I'm now enjoying being alive and I'm truly happy again. I also have new ambitions, which didn't cross my mind before MK.

PollyWollyDoodle

I highly recommend Bravissimo - fabulous service and a huge (in every sense!) range. And their fitting ladies are really friendly and put you at ease.

GreyQueen that has made me howl out loud ... but also made me pause for thought. I grew up in a home which was rich in many things but not in cash. Being the youngest, I rarely had anything new unless it was made by my mum; her dressmaking skills were fabulous but she was quite old-fashioned and until I began earning money, clothes were a constant source of anguish to me. I never looked 'right' and it's taken me years to overcome that and develop my own style and feel comfortable about it. I think I may have to have a conversation with my PB and find out what she's scared of.

You are so right about the sandals, though! Been there, done that. :rotfl:

GreyQueen

My self-consciousness about never looking 'right' lead me to a lot of unnecessary consumption as I tried to find the look which would make me acceptable, popular and whatever.

I eventually grew in self-confidence to the degree where I can hold this chatter of social anxiety at bay for a while, but it does leave me susceptible to the blandishments of the clothing industry.

Or it would have, if they bothered catering for gangly nearly-sixfooters who take a size 18 in clothing and a size 9 shoe. If more fitted me, I'd've probably spent a lot more than I have on clothing over the years.

PB is the Inner Brat, the part of my headspace which is like a truculent toddler with a greedy character. Not very evolved, is PB. Anthromorposising her gives me a chance to recognise, laugh at, and manage PB-driven desires and behaviours.

gallygirl

I need your help ladies. I'm shortly to start packing to move from the UK to Spain. No furniture, all household goods and clothes. Plus Mr GG's golf clubs .

I've asked for quotes for 4 cubic metres, to include some pots for the garden. That is all I'm taking as I don't even have 4 cubic metres of spare storage.

Totting up in my head, there's probably 6 cubic metres of 'stuff'' so need to cut down by 50%. MKing my socks is not going to cut it :eek:. I'm not exactly the hoarder queen so there are no obvious easy wins

Wish me luck. I will need it :eek:.

maryb

these are THE most comfortable and supportive bras EVER!!
http://www.marksandspencer.com/total-support-moulded-smooth-oriental-floral-embroidered-b-e-bra/p/p22235784

You don't get any lumps and bumps under tee shirts and even at 60, the girls are nearer my armpits than my elbows

clippy_girl

gallygirl wrote: »

I need your help ladies. I'm shortly to start packing to move from the UK to Spain. No furniture, all household goods and clothes. Plus Mr GG's golf clubs .

I've asked for quotes for 4 cubic metres, to include some pots for the garden. That is all I'm taking as I don't even have 4 cubic metres of spare storage.

Totting up in my head, there's probably 6 cubic metres of 'stuff'' so need to cut down by 50%. MKing my socks is not going to cut it :eek:. I'm not exactly the hoarder queen so there are no obvious easy wins

Wish me luck. I will need it :eek:.

You can borrow my book when I am back from holiday or pay for me to fly out and I will bring it in my case?

clippy_girl

I would also recommend bravissimo for a fitting. You can get lovely bras that are supportive as well as plainer stuff. And swimwear. And clothes You can buy big bras in Asda etc but they just don't offer as much support.

Also once you are familiar with brands, styles and sizes you can pick them up on eBay (new) for cheap.