Should People Have Children If They Cant Afford Them

bluelass

balletshoes wrote: »

nope - if she wants to kit her child out in designer everything, she foots the bill.

im saying she is a cheeky moo that's what and if anyone else agrees with me and give me advice. She even thinks we should let them live in our house rent free yes really. They lived at her parents for 3 years then when she got preggers she wanted a rented house.The deposit they saved for an house whilst at her parents was spent by her on baby things pate de jour anyone?.

bluelass

bluelass wrote: »

im saying she is a cheeky moo that's what and if anyone else agrees with me and give me advice. She even thinks we should let them live in our house rent free yes really. They lived at her parents for 3 years then when she got preggers she wanted a rented house.The deposit they saved for an house whilst at her parents was spent by her on baby things pate de jour anyone?.

When I said live in our house I meant she wants me and my hub to move out and find somewhere so they can have it all to themselves. And oh she thinks if and when my hubby snuffs it our house should go directly to them and me out on my ear.

System

sulphate wrote: »

An argument on the other side, my cousin works full time and pays a mortgage on his own house, whilst his girlfriend doesn't work and lives in a 4 bedroom council house with 3 children (although one of them is now an adult and in the army). If my cousin lived with her all the time she would lose most of her benefits so he goes back to his house a couple of nights a week. .

So she's claiming as a single parent even though she technically isn't?

bluelass

TBeckett100 wrote: »

And why not? Society is a business. The system needs tax revenues to keep the whole thing going. what is the point in having a load of no hopers breeding like rabbits?

Take Africa. What Bob Geldof should have given them was the snip. No point 30 years later still banging on about it, some places on earth are very inhospitable. It's the process of natural selection

I am certainly not racist in any way but certain countries shun sex education and contraception because they say god should decide how many children they have. Granted the RC church didn't approve of contraception not so long ago, times change and have to. Tis earth is way too over populated yes have a child if you want to but it should be limited to one per couple, and if the man remarries or meets another girl then he cant breed again.

VfM4meplse

kingfisherblue wrote: »

My husband left me and our children to start a new family elsewhere.

I really feel for you, this must have been incredibly tough to deal with in top of everything else.

But I also feel sorry for him, a man without any scruples. He certainly didn't take his vows seriously.

VfM4meplse

bluelass wrote: »

I am certainly not racist in any way but certain countries shun sex education and contraception because they say god should decide how many children they have.

I think the universal problem is the failure of men to keep it in their pants. It's nothing to do with race or religion.

mgdavid

*max* wrote: »

This got 5 "thanks" (at the time of posting, no doubt it'll be more!).

Awesome. Really, awesome. This makes me so, so glad I chose the UK as my home.

Your choice may be re-assessed and changed at any time you like.

AubreyMac

meer53 wrote: »

I don't know anyone who would do this ?

This would vary in culture.

My colleagues (they're mothers) was having a conversation about childcare. One colleague pays her parents to help babysit as in her culture that is the expectation. Another colleague was shocked at this believing parents should help our for free as that's what parents should do.

haras_nosirrah

Surely the easiest answer would be to cap child related benefits to two children. That would stop the baby breeders as they wouldn't get paid to have more but I don't believe that only rich people should be able to have children as that would be incredibly unfair.

kingfisherblue

VfM4meplse wrote: »

I really feel for you, this must have been incredibly tough to deal with in top of everything else.

But I also feel sorry for him, a man without any scruples. He certainly didn't take his vows seriously.

Yes. times have been tough. Emotionally, I was a wreck for a long time. We had been together for 19 years, married for 16. However, I am the lucky one. My ex sees the children once a week for a few hours, or at least, he sees our disabled son every week. Our daughter has her own life and sees him maybe a couple of hours a month, and our other son wants to spend Saturdays with his friends, rather than with his dad (who spends quite a bit of time in the bookies instead of with his kids). I see them every day, and have watched them grow. I have been there with them through good times and bad, and my two non-disabled children have little respect for him.


Our daughter is due to give birth any day now. At 23, she has a decent job and her own home with her partner. I'm going to be a big part of my grandchild's life, my ex less so.


I'm happy, although life is difficult at times. My ex...... well, only he knows if he is happy or not, but he is struggling with the fact that our son doesn't want to spend as much time with him any more.


I feel blessed that I have a great relationship with my kids. I just feel sorry that their relationship with their dad isn't as good as I had always dreamed.