Should People Have Children If They Cant Afford Them

supermassive

Mojisola wrote: »

Every society needs people who are willing to work at vital but lower paid jobs.

It's no good being a lawyer or doctor or politician if there's no-one driving lorries or working in childcare or working in factories.

If only the wealthy are allowed to have children and those children expect to go into well-paid aspirational jobs, society will either collapse or a large percentage of those children will be forced to go into the general workforce.

Not everyone with an upbringing that wasn't restricted in a harsh way due to funds, is going to be intellectually capable. Equally, if you're from a poorer family, and you have the best brain in the world, the financial side holds you back from achieving your full potential for your whole life. That's shameful.

I know some people who are not at all from a poor background that work in production factories etc, because they're simply not intellectuals. They're not cut out for anything higher.

It's a problem when intellectuals, people who could've achieved great things, are working part time at tesco because their family's finances didn't allow them to flourish.

meer53 wrote: »

Wow :eek:

I can't believe someone actually thinks this. Do you have children ?

Achieving great things doesn't require pots of money.

Even better than having children, I used to be one!

I'm not saying you have to be wealthy to have children, but it'd be irresponsible to have a child brought into your home if you aren't in a financial position to provide the best.

If your goal isn't to provide the best possible and to give a child the greatest opportunities in life, you should surely be questioning your motives for becoming a parent. Are those motives selfish?

I'm coming across a bit 'Katie Hopkins' here, but honestly, do any of you think bringing up a child in financial hardship is a good thing? Surely not.

Buzzybee90

supermassive wrote: »

Not everyone with an upbringing that wasn't restricted in a harsh way due to funds, is going to be intellectually capable. Equally, if you're from a poorer family, and you have the best brain in the world, the financial side holds you back from achieving your full potential for your whole life. That's shameful.

I know some people who are not at all from a poor background that work in production factories etc, because they're simply not intellectuals. They're not cut out for anything higher.

It's a problem when intellectuals, people who could've achieved great things, are working part time at tesco because their family's finances didn't allow them to flourish.



Even better than having children, I used to be one!

I'm not saying you have to be wealthy to have children, but it'd be irresponsible to have a child brought into your home if you aren't in a financial position to provide the best.

If your goal isn't to provide the best possible and to give a child the greatest opportunities in life, you should surely be questioning your motives for becoming a parent. Are those motives selfish?

I'm coming across a bit 'Katie Hopkins' here, but honestly, do any of you think bringing up a child in financial hardship is a good thing? Surely not.

I've never really understood what relation money has to educational opportunities in these statements... I feel I had the exact same opportunities as my peers - regardless of our family income.

supermassive

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

I've never really understood what relation money has to educational opportunities in these statements... I feel I had the exact same opportunities as my peers - regardless of our family income.

Earnings relate to the property you live in.
The property you live in relates to the schools nearby.
The school you attend is where you get your education.
If you attend school with people at the lower end of the scale - aka troublecausers, future prison cell tenants (like I did) then your education will suffer (like mine did).
If your education suffers due to this, which is very very common, then it all stems from finances.

I thought that'd be quite obvious.

I went to school in a poor area, and before I went to that school was a very high achiever. After being set on fire I moved to another nearby school (poor area, again). At this school, the children were tearaways, much like the other school. No education was achieved and my coursework was set on fire on the field with everyone elses.

If I'd been in a more expensive house, or even a less poor area, this would've been unlikely to happen.

Izadora

supermassive wrote: »

Even better than having children, I used to be one!

So did I (some would argue that, despite my advanced years, I'm still one) but that doesn't mean I agree with what you're saying.

I think that you're far too hung up on materialistic things and that, past being able to provide basic comforts, being indulged emotionally is far more important.

I grew up in a fairly poor area, my parents couldn't afford foreign holidays or the latest must-have fashion items and my infant and junior school had its fair share of no-hopers. However, I also had a mum who believed strongly in education and would spend hours reading various things to/with me so that I'd be able to get to a decent secondary school.

Given the choice between my upbringing and having parents who were rolling in it but palmed me off on the nanny and gave me material things rather than their time and support, I know which I'd choose.

Mojisola

supermassive wrote: »

Not everyone with an upbringing that wasn't restricted in a harsh way due to funds, is going to be intellectually capable. Equally, if you're from a poorer family, and you have the best brain in the world, the financial side holds you back from achieving your full potential for your whole life. That's shameful.

I know some people who are not at all from a poor background that work in production factories etc, because they're simply not intellectuals. They're not cut out for anything higher.

It's a problem when intellectuals, people who could've achieved great things, are working part time at tesco because their family's finances didn't allow them to flourish.

It is and always has been that way but being intellectual isn't the be-all of life. If our education system allowed the inventors, the engineers, the artists, etc, from every strata from society to achieve their potential, we would all find life was better.

Until the last few generations, most of the world's societies were happy to deny 50% of the population the opportunity to develop their potential and most still have a long way to go before women get treated equally.

I'm not saying you have to be wealthy to have children, but it'd be irresponsible to have a child brought into your home if you aren't in a financial position to provide the best.

If your goal isn't to provide the best possible and to give a child the greatest opportunities in life, you should surely be questioning your motives for becoming a parent. Are those motives selfish?

I don't equate the best possible start in life with money. If I'd grown up in a household with spare money, I would have had more opportunities but I don't think I would have turned out a better person.

Even if I'd had a very well-paid job when I had my children, I could still have developed the same health problems and been unable to continue working. Should my children have been taken away and given to someone who had more money so that they didn't miss out on all the opportunities?

Buzzybee90

supermassive wrote: »

Earnings relate to the property you live in.
The property you live in relates to the schools nearby.
The school you attend is where you get your education.
If you attend school with people at the lower end of the scale - aka troublecausers, future prison cell tenants (like I did) then your education will suffer (like mine did).
If your education suffers due to this, which is very very common, then it all stems from finances.

I thought that'd be quite obvious.

I went to school in a poor area, and before I went to that school was a very high achiever. After being set on fire I moved to another nearby school (poor area, again). At this school, the children were tearaways, much like the other school. No education was achieved and my coursework was set on fire on the field with everyone elses.

If I'd been in a more expensive house, or even a less poor area, this would've been unlikely to happen.

Not really, people at my school ranged from gigantic 'mansions' to 1 bed houses and everywhere in between. I'm sure there were people at your school that were more well off.

supermassive

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

Not really, people at my school ranged from gigantic 'mansions' to 1 bed houses and everywhere in between. I'm sure there were people at your school that were more well off.

Certainly not! If you were 'well off' at any school in my town it meant your parents had a car. 'Very well off' meant they had a mortgage - which they seldom could afford.

I think you're underestimating the true reality of being raised in poverty.

Mojisola

supermassive wrote: »

I think you're underestimating the true reality of being raised in poverty.

I think this is a problem that a lot of people have. If you haven't known real poverty, it's very hard to understand the reality.

meer53

I grew up on a council estate with my single mum (my dad died when i was small) We never went on a holiday abroad, we never had a car, we didn't have a telephone in the house until i was in my teens. My Mum showed me that not having money was no barrier to where you can go in life. It's up to you.

I never really got the chance to thank my Mum for where i am now. I'm really sad about that. It was her outlook on life and the way she brought us up that led us to where me and my brother are now. It had absolutely nothing to do with how much money we had. Because we had none.

Supermassive, your comments make you sound very bitter.

Buzzybee90

supermassive wrote: »

Certainly not! If you were 'well off' at any school in my town it meant your parents had a car. 'Very well off' meant they had a mortgage - which they seldom could afford.

I think you're underestimating the true reality of being raised in poverty.

Put your tiny violin away supermassive