Gobsmacked!

hazyjo

My first husband cheated on me and left me for his secretary. He started it three days before our wedding and left me three months later. We'd been together over 6 years.


I spoke with his mum after he'd left and she had a go at me! ME! Said things like 'well, you didn't even iron his shirts - and he had to iron his own clothes for your honeymoon...'. (I work full time and was, at that time, in a stressful job - in fact, he'd allowed me to hand my notice in so I was job-hunting on top of it all.)


Really, I'm not gonna waste any more breath (typing) on it. You get my gist. Mothers will often defend their offspring - sometimes due to lies they've been told, sometimes just down to blood. I felt so desperate to let everyone know I wasn't in the wrong and HATE people thinking bad of me - it was extremely hard to just close that door and realise it didn't actually matter, I'd never have to see them again.


Jx

makeitstop

tea_lover wrote: »

There's a difference between having a good old whinge to your mum when you find out your bf is a lying cheat and getting your mum to send abusive messages on your behalf. A big difference.

How on earth do you know he had anything to do with what his mother wrote on FB.?

You don't, it's pure supposition.

He may have well only "whinged to his Mum" about his GF, and his Mum may well have taken it upon herself to get going on the spiteful hate filled crap she perhaps wrote on FB.

makeitstop

Izadora wrote: »

There were different responses because one person ran to mum for support while the other ran to mum to get her to fight his battles for him.

Sorry, but how do you know that.???

makeitstop

dawyldthing wrote: »

There's a fair share of women players, but I should imagine men count for a hell of a lot (only have to read on here sometimes and it's men that leave/ cheat etc. women can be just as bad, but I'd say it's mainly men

What utter tripe this is.

makeitstop

OP, I hope you and your daughter are ok and can move on and away from these people and this episode.

The lad (scumbag moron) and his Mum (if it's really her) sound like the sort of trash that should be placed into a metal container with the doors welded shut and dropped into the ocean.

Plop......sail home.

fin7

He always had an excuse about taking her to meet his mum, something I did say was strange, he was more than happy to spend time here. He would only take her to his house when no one was in, he wouldn't tell anyone they were together. I've told her something isn't right about him or the situation when he's acting like this, she's since found out it's because of the other girls involved.

I've told her that a guy that wants to be with her should feel happy for his family to know, or am I missing something?

marisco_2

fin7 wrote: »

After she sent it she blocked my daughter then unblocked her to send another one, I think the woman's got a screw loose somewhere. My daughter has now blocked her. I'm just shocked that someone could send something so vile.

OP I hope that your daughter is doing okay, after going through what must have been a nasty ordeal. It sounds as if she has handled things really maturely and will have benefitted from your calm support. Storms often just blow themselves out. Hopefully she will have no further problems from her ex or his mum, and can move on and be far happier for not having people like that in her life.

getmore4less

fin7 wrote: »

He always had an excuse about taking her to meet his mum, something I did say was strange, he was more than happy to spend time here. He would only take her to his house when no one was in, he wouldn't tell anyone they were together. I've told her something isn't right about him or the situation when he's acting like this, she's since found out it's because of the other girls involved.

I've told her that a guy that wants to be with her should feel happy for his family to know, or am I missing something?

OK they are good signs, family tends to be both or none.

The only hang out at home when others are out is a warning sign as is sex every time you meet.

She needs to get some male mates they will spot a dodgy one a mile off.

What were her friends boyfriends saying about him?
(they were hanging out with others if not that's a major warning sign)


Does she have a dad?

fin7

She has a big group of friends, both male and female, they've really rallied around, the males have said that if they'd been messing about with so many girls their mothers would not be sticking up for them, they'd be clipping them around the ear, lol.

The thing I found strange is, if anyone is stuck with their work they'll text her and ask her to come into college in her own time to help them, she'll happily go, she has no shortage of friends, this kid on the other hand, hardly anyone likes him, she said to me today that she hadn't realised just how much she wasn't hanging around with her usual crowd because he didn't like them and they didn't like him.

ciderwithrosie_2

Hate to be the one to mention it but if he's been with several girls at once, should your daughter be thinking about getting a check up at the GUM clinic?